Women of Lit: A Safe Place To Share

Body part pics are always a huge risk. The culture on each individual thread is different here, but as always it only takes one asshole….

Oh the river cruise sounds wonderful!
The history and the architecture are amazing! Most of the cities we saw were founded more than 350 years before the Plymouth Colony here in the States. Hubby was very interested in the WWII history, and I found some of the memorials to the Jews to be very touching. In particular, the "Stumbling Stones".
 
I'm as close as I've ever been to being truly content... so long as I stay in my house and don't access outside information. 🙄

And I agree the river cruise sounds amazing. My roomies from college are organizing a Caribbean cruise for this fall, and I'm not sure it sounds like my kinda thing. I'm much more a cabin in the woods than beach kind of girl, which is probably why the European river cruise seems like it would be fire AF but I'm very 'meh' about the Caribbean cruise. But I said i'd go, because I don't want to be the only one who doesn't go. 🫤
 
I'm as close as I've ever been to being truly content... so long as I stay in my house and don't access outside information. 🙄

And I agree the river cruise sounds amazing. My roomies from college are organizing a Caribbean cruise for this fall, and I'm not sure it sounds like my kinda thing. I'm much more a cabin in the woods than beach kind of girl, which is probably why the European river cruise seems like it would be fire AF but I'm very 'meh' about the Caribbean cruise. But I said i'd go, because I don't want to be the only one who doesn't go. 🫤
Its good for you to get out and make the best of it. Just think of the ship as an all-inclusive cabin on a lake!
We have been on an Alaska cruise. Totally different vibe. On the river cruise, it was a new port every. Always busy. The ship only moved in the evening & overnight. On the ocean cruise there were days at sea and it was a slower pace overall. A Caribbean cruise isn't attractive to us since we are not beach people.
 
We have been on an Alaska cruise. Totally different vibe. On the river cruise, it was a new port every. Always busy. The ship only moved in the evening & overnight. On the ocean cruise there were days at sea and it was a slower pace overall. A Caribbean cruise isn't attractive to us since we are not beach people.
And I agree the river cruise sounds amazing. My roomies from college are organizing a Caribbean cruise for this fall, and I'm not sure it sounds like my kinda thing. I'm much more a cabin in the woods than beach kind of girl, which is probably why the European river cruise seems like it would be fire AF but I'm very 'meh' about the Caribbean cruise. But I said i'd go, because I don't want to be the only one who doesn't go. 🫤
I will toss in that you (either of you) might want to consider a Maine Windjammer cruise. It's an entirely different vibe from cruise ships, much more rustic, gorgeous scenery, generally great food (I'm not a lobster fan but I have been assured that the fresh lobsters are amazing) and a wonderful time.
 
I will toss in that you (either of you) might want to consider a Maine Windjammer cruise. It's an entirely different vibe from cruise ships, much more rustic, gorgeous scenery, generally great food (I'm not a lobster fan but I have been assured that the fresh lobsters are amazing) and a wonderful time.
See, I think I might like something like that. But my ex-roomie organizing the trip goes on cruises all the time with her husband, so she wants all of us ex-roomies to go on one together as a kid of reunion. She picked the cruise. 🤷‍♀️

Anyway, I agreed to go despite my initial reservations that it would be boring for me since I'm several years sober. But I've been assured there are fun things to do that don't involve drinking.
 
See, I think I might like something like that. But my ex-roomie organizing the trip goes on cruises all the time with her husband, so she wants all of us ex-roomies to go on one together as a kid of reunion. She picked the cruise. 🤷‍♀️

Anyway, I agreed to go despite my initial reservations that it would be boring for me since I'm several years sober. But I've been assured there are fun things to do that don't involve drinking.
I've found that if you have low expectations then the event can turn out better than you feared. I totally understand the peer pressure, but stand your ground - if they want to party with booze, cheer them on but let them know you can't drink. That way you don't come across as a Debbie Downer.
 
I will toss in that you (either of you) might want to consider a Maine Windjammer cruise. It's an entirely different vibe from cruise ships, much more rustic, gorgeous scenery, generally great food (I'm not a lobster fan but I have been assured that the fresh lobsters are amazing) and a wonderful time.
I'll look into that!
 
I am not, genuinely, upset about the lazily dehumanising lines like "so what's your cup size" or "get on your knees slut" or porn links in lieu of hello. Those are easily ignored. I'm not even all that miffed about men who "take the time to get to know us" and despite a fairly pleasant back and forth they immediately block us when we don't turn out to share their kink. About Doms who ignore our limits, repeatedly, or insist we submit when we've already politely explained that we're just not feeling it.

Don't get me wrong, everything above is annoying as hell, but it's a faceless screenname we've barely started engaging with; we'll recover.

What really sticks in the gut are the long-time chatters. The ones you're always happy to see online. You hit it off right away and they are so easy to talk to. You've talked about all sorts of shit from sexy to fun to serious to really personal. You don't exchange photos (hell, maybe you do) but you have a pretty good idea what they look like. You even imagine being friends in real life. They become the main reason you log onto LIT and the first thing you search for.

They had you thinking you were friends. That the Internet is a pretty cool place when anonymous strangers can build a comfortable connection of trust.

Then one day they flip out at you. Go off on you for not asking about them enough. For not being in the mood to talk sexy one day, or for RP-ing with other chatters but not with them. You find yourself arguing--actually arguing--with a stranger on LIT, defending yourself for god-knows-what.

And this little corner of the Internet loses its gleam again. It was never a safe space where you were seen as an actual human being. You've just received a shitty reminder of the dingy, shameless, single-minded glory hole that it really is, where all you're good for is turning someone on and getting them off or GTFO, and hate yourself for being naive.
 
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And this little corner of the Internet loses its gleam again. It was never a safe space where you were seen as an actual human being. You see it for the dingy, shameless, single-minded glory hole that it really is, where all you're good for is turning someone on and getting them off of GTFO, and hate yourself for being naive.
This right here is the worst part.

There are some wonderful people on here (those of you on this thread for instance!) but the constant worry that even the most sociable and of partners doesn’t see you as fully human is so draining and demoralizing.

<hugs> Mandy I’m so sorry you have to go through this bullshit. That any of us do
 
Then one day they flip out at you. Go off on you for not asking about them enough. For not being in the mood to talk sexy one day, or for RP-ing with other chatters but not with them. You find yourself arguing--actually arguing--with a stranger on LIT, defending yourself for god-knows-what
Yeppers. This is one of the reasons I keep up my emotional barriers. I had similar experiences my first year or two here, and I learned to keep things casual. So while I share a lot in the forums (kind of verbal exhibitionism sometimes), I can be standoffish in PMs because I don't want to get close like that. We have to protect ourselves first.
 
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