✨Highlights and Bombshells💥

[Love_Is_Blonde]

Thinking even more about this… what do you need when you are upset? How are you comforted?

People need different things when they are upset.

When some people are upset, they want company and attention and things done for them. They are able to delegate jobs and chores. They get comfort from the constant house full of people. They don’t want to be alone. They are not self-conscious about mourning or being upset publicly. (I’m thinking about one of my college roommates and also my sister, specifically).

When I am upset, I want to hide. I hate to be so vulnerable unless it is with someone I am very close with. Even then, I feel like I’m being a complete nuisance. I just want to be a hermit and sleep. I don’t want to disrupt anything or anyone. I pretty much just want everyone to act as if I’m not there. Eventually I seek out help if I need it. I go to counseling if I feel it will help.

It’s interesting to me how differently people react.

What made me think of this question… idk but I’m going with it.

 

[BreukelenAnima]

What do you need when you are upset? How are you comforted?

I'm just finding this thread and immediately see its value and importance in dialoging and learning from each another. I hope it's Ok to lend my opinion to this question?

When I am upset, I do seek to be alone -- not so much to hide, but to reflect on what is bothering me, or causing me pain... or if it's a difficult situation -- how best to handle it. I tend to be quiet by nature and I agree with Love_Is_Blonde, I don't like others to see me vulnerable... I hate it, in fact.

In solitude, I can best understand the situation and own up to my involvement and act from that position, and I do consider it a postion of personal strength: What did I do wrong? Where does the fault lie within me? What can I do to change or remedy the situation?

I do strive to live in a world where I can be a positive influence for others and to seek happiness and contentment. Both are interconnected. The world sometimes seems designed to create unnecessary drama and conflict for me at every turn, though, so sometimes being alone helps me navigate my path forward... and I need that on occasion.

 

[Mei5ter]

It’s really hard to find a good therapist. You have to try on a lot before you find a good fit. And also just bc one comes well recommended, that doesn’t mean they will be a good fit.

Therapists and bras alike. Support matters.

 

[SimonSex]

Thinking even more about this… what do you need when you are upset? How are you comforted?

On average I am a pretty calm and measured dude. The odd moments when I am truly upset set me off center in a big way. Mostly I seek validation for the thoughts I am thinking when I am upset. Wifey is my best friend and sounding board, so she is the go-to pretty much always. She’ll tell me if I’m off base or spot-on with love and objectivity. For better or worse I have zero problems with confrontation, so it’s good to have a coach telling me to pull some punches now and then.

 

[hotwords229_A]

when you are upset? How are you comforted?

https://media4.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2lkPTc5MGI3NjExa3dpc3Fjb2lua2VhenpmZGxwMmF6YWNoejZyN3N4aGphbTBzMDZ1MCZlcD12MV9pbnRlcm5hbF9naWZfYnlfaWQmY3Q9Zw/11h1hxZvlj0W9q/giphy.gif

Gear up. Go directly to the source. Sort it out.
When I’m angry (my version of upset) I want it to stop immediately.

 

[Endless_Night]

So human Xanax is a desirable trait in Enny friends. Everything is starting to make sense now

Everything? What is "everything"?

 

[smtst5]

Thinking even more about this… what do you need when you are upset? How are you comforted?

People need different things when they are upset.

When some people are upset, they want company and attention and things done for them. They are able to delegate jobs and chores. They get comfort from the constant house full of people. They don’t want to be alone. They are not self-conscious about mourning or being upset publicly. (I’m thinking about one of my college roommates and also my sister, specifically).

When I am upset, I want to hide. I hate to be so vulnerable unless it is with someone I am very close with. Even then, I feel like I’m being a complete nuisance. I just want to be a hermit and sleep. I don’t want to disrupt anything or anyone. I pretty much just want everyone to act as if I’m not there. Eventually I seek out help if I need it. I go to counseling if I feel it will help.

It’s interesting to me how differently people react.

What made me think of this question… idk but I’m going with it.

When I’m upset, I withdraw from everyone and everything until I have a chance to process what is bothering me.

 

[Endless_Night]

Thinking even more about this… what do you need when you are upset? How are you comforted?

I hate to be so vulnerable -

This^.

It really depends on what has gotten me upset.

I either shut down and want to be alone. Huddling on the couch with dark chocolate watching old black-and-white mysteries or bad sci-fi. Or, I lose my temper, scorch the earth, then shut down and head to the couch to do above, emotionally exhausted.

I suspect my kind of sex would be comforting, but it can be hard to access when needed.

 

[Apisto42]

Thinking even more about this… what do you need when you are upset? How are you comforted?

A taco. Then a change. Something different to experience.

I’m old enough to have a lot of really shitty life experiences (though many of them were at a young age). And I suppose I learned at a young age, that the adage “this too shall pass” is true. There will be more shit, but this shit will be over at some point. Or I’ll be dead. In which case it won’t matter.

So eat a taco, smell the flower, put on my big boy panties, and keep going.

 

[birdy]

What do you need when you are upset? How are you comforted?

I tend to withdraw when upset but it's to process rather than avoid. Once I've sorted my own stuff out I'll open up to others if needed. My sister is my sounding board and she has helped me see things from different perspectives in a way that doesn't invalidate my feelings, but helps me see things in a more well-rounded way.

Like @Apisto42 said, I have the mindset of "it will be okay". You just have to get through it. I am a list maker and like to break problems down in steps. Thinking of things in small parts rather than an overwhelming whole helps me work through the situation with less anxiety.

 

[Apisto42]

What do you need when you are upset? How are you comforted?

I tend to withdraw when upset but it's to process rather than avoid. Once I've sorted my own stuff out I'll open up to others if needed. My sister is my sounding board and she has helped me see things from different perspectives in a way that doesn't invalidate my feelings, but helps me see things in a more well-rounded way.

Like @Apisto42 said, I have the mindset of "it will be okay". You just have to get through it. I am a list maker and like to break problems down in steps. Thinking of things in small parts rather than an overwhelming whole helps me work through the situation with less anxiety.

If your lists are in color coded spreadsheets, then I might have to start flirting with you.

 

[cheekygirl75]

If your lists are in color coded spreadsheets, then I might have to start flirting with you.

Me too!

 

[birdy]

If your lists are in color coded spreadsheets, then I might have to start flirting with you.

They are mostly on color coded sticky notes.

 

[Love_Is_Blonde]

*peeks in*

Did someone say color-coded spreadsheets???


https://media0.giphy.com/media/55aXMRvbaFJT68EThn/giphy.gif?cid=9b38fe91phfws2bdnca0r25m2qaxfqwf2oi9av6ncqte1aex&ep=v1_gifs_related&rid=giphy.gif&ct=g

 

[Love_Is_Blonde]

Let’s talk about… ummm
​

Do you have the gift of gab? What topics do you like to discuss? Or does it depend on who you are talking to? Are there topics that you actively avoid talking about— understandably there are some touchy topics and those count if you want to mention those. (No mud slinging or else time out chairs galore!) but what are subjects that you would and would not like to discuss and with whom- why and why not? (Oof what a terrible sentence!)

How about here on Lit? Anything you like to talk about? Anything extra naughty? Do tell!

What about those interests that you have that you can’t find a partner who shares that interest? Maybe someone here has that same hobby! You never know. I wasn’t sure if anyone would be interested in some astrology conversations and I was pleasantly surprised!

Anything on the tip of your tongue?

I have a ton of things but it’s my bedtime. I will be sharing plenty later.

G’night, All. (I think I may be turning into a night otter!)

 

[SimonSex]

It is not lost on me that I have gained some valuable insights and perspectives from chats and posts on this, a porn site forum. There is a wide variety of people and lived experiences here that I find quite enjoyable, sometimes irritating, but always enlightening. Whether you have come here to write naughty stories, show off your titties or find a hook-up, on the forum you usually end up with more interpersonal interactions than you bargained for. I appreciate that there are a lot of intelligent and thoughtful folks here. Again, I find all of this quite interesting because of the risqué nature of this site. Always have.

We give you a pass on your run-on sentence, @Love_Is_Blonde ! You ask a lot of questions, and I think the most sincere form of flattery is to ask someone about themselves.

 

[hotwords229_A]

Do you have the gift of gab?

I do not. I do have the gift of listening and maybe throwing in a funny or insightful comment here and there. The only problem I have with listening is, if I’m bored with the topic, then, like Homer Simpson, I can actually hear my brain get in a car and drive away.

What topics do you like to discuss? Or does it depend on who you are talking to?

Totally depends on who I am talking to. For me, my interest sometimes depends on the person’s interest. I like hearing people talk about something they love, even if I don’t understand it.

Are there topics that you actively avoid talking about— understandably there are some touchy topics and those count if you want to mention those. (No mud slinging or else time out chairs galore!) but what are subjects that you would and would not like to discuss and with whom- why and why not? (Oof what a terrible sentence!)

Certainly. I avoid politics and religion like the plague. There are very few people I know who I can actually discuss these things with. Most people are so incapable of having a real discussion about these things without turning it into a team event, where their team is better than my team, and I’m not even on any of those teams!

I have a crazy notion that nobody knows what’s right and everyone is allowed to think what they want as long as they don’t push it on me. But we should be able to have a normal conversation about religion and politics without all the “I know better and you’re evil” bullshit.

How about here on Lit? Anything you like to talk about? Anything extra naughty? Do tell!

Sex, cocks, boobs, cum, pussies, nudity and buttholes mostly.
I am a simple man.

What about those interests that you have that you can’t find a partner who shares that interest? Maybe someone here has that same hobby! You never know. I wasn’t sure if anyone would be interested in some astrology conversations and I was pleasantly surprised!

This is a tough one. I find that my kinks (vanilla as they may be) don’t often fit the “kink genre” they belong to. Does that make sense? I like aspects of certain kinks, but not other parts and that rarely fits with others who like those kinks.

It’s hard to find just the right person, so I don’t try.

 

[Apisto42]

Let’s talk about… ummm
​

View attachment 2536212
Do you have the gift of gab? What topics do you like to discuss? Or does it depend on who you are talking to? Are there topics that you actively avoid talking about— understandably there are some touchy topics and those count if you want to mention those.

Like @hotwords229_A, politics, religion, and I’ll add in money. I was raised to not talk about those. They just cause problems.

I do like to just chat about whatever though. I know a little about a lot of things, so it’s fun to get going on one thing, talk about a bunch of other stuff and then somehow find yourself back in the first topic.

(No mud slinging or else time out chairs galore!)

There are some true twatwaffles on here. Should we name names? What’s the time out chair like? Is it fun?

but what are subjects that you would and would not like to discuss and with whom- why and why not? (Oof what a terrible sentence!)

How about here on Lit? Anything you like to talk about? Anything extra naughty? Do tell!

Most of the relationships I have on here started out talking about sex and while we may occasionally talk about sex now, it’s usually more wide ranging than just boobs.

What about those interests that you have that you can’t find a partner who shares that interest? Maybe someone here has that same hobby! You never know. I wasn’t sure if anyone would be interested in some astrology conversations and I was pleasantly surprised!

I did have a fun conversation one time where we talked about painting gaming miniatures and terrain building.

Anything on the tip of your tongue?

You?

I have a ton of things but it’s my bedtime. I will be sharing plenty later.

G’night, All. (I think I may be turning into a night otter!)

I do love me some otters.

 

[hotwords229_A]

it’s usually more wide ranging than just boobs.

So . . . nipples too?

 

[SimonSex]

Living in the DC area, it is a challenge to avoid political discussions both with folks nearby and others far away who wonder just what the fuck is going on. I will engage on any topic and old enough to consider openness and sensitivity to those who do not share my views.

Case in point: There’s a dude here who leans hard right politically whereas I am way left on damned near every social and political issue.
Some of our posts reflected our views and I messaged him to say hello. Come to find out we have a great deal in common aside from our political leanings, and I have respect for his views (as wrong as they may be).

 

[Apisto42]

So . . . nipples too?

And ass curves.

 

[Love_Is_Blonde]

It is not lost on me that I have gained some valuable insights and perspectives from chats and posts on this, a porn site forum. There is a wide variety of people and lived experiences here that I find quite enjoyable, sometimes irritating, but always enlightening. Whether you have come here to write naughty stories, show off your titties or find a hook-up, on the forum you usually end up with more interpersonal interactions than you bargained for. I appreciate that there are a lot of intelligent and thoughtful folks here.

You come for the porn (literally and figuratively? Ok ok bad joke) and you stay for the people and the engaging conversation. It sneaks up on you, doesn’t it? Where else can you discuss baseball, books, and blowjobs all within the same few threads of each other??

Totally depends on who I am talking to. For me, my interest sometimes depends on the person’s interest. I like hearing people talk about something they love, even if I don’t understand it.

I get this. If someone is super passionate about something, even if I really don’t know what they are talking about, their excitement is contagious.
I might draw the line at car maintenance or lawn work or if someone is a Phillies fan.

I do like to just chat about whatever though. I know a little about a lot of things, so it’s fun to get going on one thing, talk about a bunch of other stuff and then somehow find yourself back in the first topic.

There are some true twatwaffles on here. Should we name names? What’s the time out chair like? Is it fun?

Yeah sometimes you meet someone with whom banter comes easily. Conversations flow. They keep up their end of the discussion, ask questions, laugh at jokes… they are able to give and take. It’s really hard if it’s always one-sided.

 

[Love_Is_Blonde]

Let’s talk about… ummm


Do you have the gift of gab? What topics do you like to discuss?

There are so many things I like to talk about. So many things I’m curious about. But like others have already said, the number of topics I want to discuss seems to multiply when I’m speaking with certain people.

Or does it depend on who you are talking to?

Yes absolutely!
Conversations sound like this, “…yes! Oh but wait!… Another thing! …Yes that’s exactly what I was thinking! …But did you hear about..? I know!!!…I read that too!…” and so on.
It’s like you each spark more ideas in each other. It’s so special when you find a friend like that.

Are there topics that you actively avoid talking about— understandably there are some touchy topics and those count if you want to mention those.

Not with the right people. I think it’s important to discuss these topics when I’m in the right frame of mind. I have to limit it though. There so so much going on right now. And much of it is heart wrenching to me. So, while I think it is important to discuss because how else will change occur, I have to take small bites at a time.

How about here on Lit? Anything you like to talk about? Anything extra naughty? Do tell!

Fantasies, things that are a new discovery about themselves. Something that makes them feel alive, on fire, passionate. Or a lesson learned, boundaries pushed.

Hobbies:

Baseball, trying to stay in shape, dogs, reading, crochet, cooking, traveling
I’ll talk about just about anything though.

 

[cheekygirl75]

Let’s talk about… ummm
​

View attachment 2536212
Do you have the gift of gab? What topics do you like to discuss? Or does it depend on who you are talking to? Are there topics that you actively avoid talking about— understandably there are some touchy topics and those count if you want to mention those. (No mud slinging or else time out chairs galore!) but what are subjects that you would and would not like to discuss and with whom- why and why not? (Oof what a terrible sentence!)

It totally depends on who I’m talking to. I don’t do superficial chat very well. I have ADHD and am an INFJ (if you believe in Meyers-Briggs, which I know is really pseudo science, but it seems to fit me) both of which mean small talk is painful for me

I actively avoid politics because it’s just depressing. I’m open to talking about religion, though. Maybe not if the person is a rabid whatever (and that includes if they believe what I do, which is to say nothing, because a person rabid about any religion/belief is boring)… But one of the best nights I ever had was staying up really late in a hotel room in Singapore discussing religion with a very varied group. I think we represented most view points but it was still respectful and interesting.

How about here on Lit? Anything you like to talk about? Anything extra naughty? Do tell!

I’m open to talking about most things, though I’m probably more uptight than some Litsters. I’m not good at the harmless flirting that so many do here.

What about those interests that you have that you can’t find a partner who shares that interest? Maybe someone here has that same hobby! You never know. I wasn’t sure if anyone would be interested in some astrology conversations and I was pleasantly surprised!

Anything on the tip of your tongue?

Can’t think of anything at the moment, but my mind is a bit mushy tonight

 

[Love_Is_Blonde]

It totally depends on who I’m talking to. I don’t do superficial chat very well. I have ADHD and am an INFJ (if you believe in Meyers-Briggs, which I know is really pseudo science, but it seems to fit me) both of which mean small talk is painful for me

I actively avoid politics because it’s just depressing. I’m open to talking about religion, though. Maybe not if the person is a rabid whatever (and that includes if they believe what I do, which is to say nothing, because a person rabid about any religion/belief is boring)… But one of the best nights I ever had was staying up really late in a hotel room in Singapore discussing religion with a very varied group. I think we represented most view points but it was still respectful and interesting.


I’m open to talking about most things, though I’m probably more uptight than some Litsters. I’m not good at the harmless flirting that so many do here.

Can’t think of anything at the moment, but my mind is a bit mushy tonight

I’m an ENFJ (heavy on the F) - I used to be an ENFP when I first took it as a teen and I was so upset when I “turned into a J”, and I remember my mother telling me that that just meant that I was now “a woman who knows what she likes”. . I liked that description very much and ever since then, I didn’t mind being a J.

I also liked what you said about those special conversations that happen and you look back on them years later and think, wow that was really unique and unusual. It sounds like your late night discussion about religion was a real learning experience. I’m envious. I want to have those deep, bare-your-soul talks, but it has to be the right mix of people. What a great memory.