What is it with younger women liking older men?

[ADIDAS00]

I hate to say it but it may not be that they're hitting on you.

It may be that you are now so much older than they that they no longer see you as someone who is apt to hit on them just because they talk to you. So, they are nice to you in the way they are nice to their friends parents.

But If you were closer to them in age, they might feel they have to be guarded so their friendliness won't be misconstrued.

True, maybe I’m just taking it that way? Maybe I think they’re hitting on me and they’re just being friendly. Good point

 

[Britva415]

maybe if you’re comfortable with being nice to others, it comes across as confident. And maybe younger guys lack that?

I hear a lot that younger guys might be too nice.

I hear it from girls complaining that guys don't pursue them, aren't forward enough. And from a guy's point of view, this represents those guys who think that being "nice guy" is attractive.

It's not, but, we're talking about guys who don't know how to be more exciting than a "niceguy" without just being a pig.

That right there absolutely comes with maturity.

In short: "nice" doesn't equate to "confident" at all.

 

[Britva415]

I think I’m gonna stop questioning it and just enjoy it and be flattered.

Would you ever take any of them up on it?

 

[Britva415]

True, maybe I’m just taking it that way? Maybe I think they’re hitting on me and they’re just being friendly. Good point

Like I was saying - maybe find out by flirting back and see if there really is mutual flirt-energy feeling happening?

It's super easy to tell, if it's not there and she's not interested. No big whoop, just drop it like a gentleman.

If it is there, it might be super easy to tell, or sometimes she may have a way of kind of concealing some of it, but she won't conceal all of it. She wants you to guess, but she also wants you to keep it up.

 

[sweetlydeviant]

I think this has been the case for a very long time. Older men have always been more interesting to me, easier to talk to. Mainly due to maturity (although not always the case) and I’ve found usually more empathetic than younger men close to my own age. I’ve always had deeper connections with older men, felt a sense of security as well and tend to find them more attractive sexually as well.

 

[ADIDAS00]

Would you ever take any of them up on it?

Probably not. It’s flattering but it seems like it would just be a mistake

 

[J D Danger]

I think this has been the case for a very long time. Older men have always been more interesting to me, easier to talk to. Mainly due to maturity (although not always the case) and I’ve found usually more empathetic than younger men close to my own age. I’ve always had deeper connections with older men, felt a sense of security as well and tend to find them more attractive sexually as well.

well said

drop me a DM sometime

 

[ADIDAS00]

I think this has been the case for a very long time. Older men have always been more interesting to me, easier to talk to. Mainly due to maturity (although not always the case) and I’ve found usually more empathetic than younger men close to my own age. I’ve always had deeper connections with older men, felt a sense of security as well and tend to find them more attractive sexually as well.

Out of all of that, empathy really stood out. Can you expand more on that? I think that might be a big aspect

 

[sweetlydeviant]

Out of all of that, empathy really stood out. Can you expand more on that? I think that might be a big aspect

My guess, albeit a simple one, is life experience.
I’ve found it easier to open up and engage in more meaningful conversations with older men. There’s a certain depth to their experiences and perspectives that makes it feel less superficial? They tend to approach conversations with more of a calm confidence and understanding, no fake bravado etc, which creates a comfortable space where I don’t feel rushed or ever judged.
Meanwhile with people my age, the conversations often seem more surface-level - obviously this is case by case.

 

[Britva415]

Probably not. It’s flattering but it seems like it would just be a mistake

Late 20s/early 30s? Seems fine, 28-38 is a real sweet spot.

Plus, I mean, they don't have to be your girlfriend. Hell, they don't even have to be a one-and-done.

I flirt just for the fun of it even without anticipating that it will go anywhere. And if it does go somewhere, I have boundaries and I tell them what they are beforehand. No mistakes - unless they make one.

Try getting numbers without any plan to even use them You think you feel flattered now? Imagine what getting a number will feel like, even without any plan to ever use it.

 

[calmlikeabomb]

Based on personal experience (offline and ladies here) the fact that older men are supposed to be more mature, more patient, and have an aura of power and experience about them is what makes them attractive.

And in many ways, I can relate. Age, experience and wisdom has allowed me to slow down and appreciate what is in front of me. I suppose younger women (especially early 20s) are still at that stage of life where they are expected to be conformists, and yet have their own individuality. They wish to be "seen and heard" for who they are and who they want to be, and an older man, who doesn't just spout stuff he heard in a podcast, who has lived experience under his belt, could be as patient and kind as they deserve.

And to be honest, it works the other way too. As a younger man, one of my lovers was an older woman. She was almost twice my age, and she was my guide in many things in life. She was "comfortable" and I felt like I could open myself up completely to her with no judgement.

 

[Veronica_Flora]

My grandma was 10 years younger than my grandpa and she kind of told me the man was supposed to be older than the woman and I think that had a big influence on me liking older men.

 

[PapaRomantic]

In the last year, I’ve had at least 5 or 6 women in their late twenties to early thirties hit on me. It happened again today. Like, they openly hit on me. They didn’t hide it. Has it always been this way? I never remember younger women hitting on older men when I was younger. It just wasn’t a thing…that I know of.

I mean, I have gray stubble so I don’t look young at all. I always thought when I got this age, NO younger women would ever even look at me. I find it flattering but my mind is perplexed. It seems like something has shifted in the universe, lol. Are older men in style these days? What’s happening?

Ask your wife. Supposedly she's chatting with an older man.

 

[Ciceri]

A young woman in the apartment bldg next door let me know she was interested in me. I enjoyed spending time w her but deliberately did not ask her age. I didn’t really want to know but I found out at her birthday party. She was 23 - exactly half my age. The sex was fantastic. She’d visit most nights. Many of my references went over her head and I found myself omitting details of my life that underscored our age gap. She didn’t seem to mind tho. She was one of nine children so I think she missed having father/daughter time. I also think she liked the fact I own my own house. She’d been in abusive relationships and I think she was ready for a mature partner

 

[dougmva]

Few years ago one of the girls at work tried to get me to go out with her and she was at least 20 years my JR. Only issue I had was she had two young children from a previous marriage, and I'm like nope been there done that before.. not happening again.

 

[ThatIrishGirl]

It has never been an age thing really, more how guys of a certain age carry themselves. Younger guys now have grown up in an Instagram age where social media dictates how they act. Instead the people they interact with should dictate that.
There really is nothing worse than being out and about to have to fend off a guy who's approach is like a how to get a girl short story. The ability to be yourself instead of being a persona is lost on most men under 30.

 

[urbangentleman]

I think I’m gonna stop questioning it and just enjoy it and be flattered.

I just truly just don’t get it. Everytime I try to make it make sense in my head, I get confused.

I will join in saying I’m wired to be nice and it’s taken a lot of talk to have me just accept they are getting what they want and just enjoy making us feel good. I talked to 3 more younger women on lit yesterday evening that echoed this.

 

[urbangentleman]

It has never been an age thing really, more how guys of a certain age carry themselves. Younger guys now have grown up in an Instagram age where social media dictates how they act. Instead the people they interact with should dictate that.
There really is nothing worse than being out and about to have to fend off a guy who's approach is like a how to get a girl short story. The ability to be yourself instead of being a persona is lost on most men under 30.

This hits straight on. I couldn’t “act” different if I tried. I live by the golden rule and try to bring positivity.

 

[urbangentleman]

Ok - Any guys have the opposite? I hooked up with a 44 yr old when i was 27. Full on cliche hotel naughty. It was awesome and we still talk on socials. I also had the creepy experience with a GFs mom openly discussing that i was bigger than her husband. Seems like an ego trip but at the time much more WTF? moments.

 

[Morton81]

That you know of Do you think it would happen right in front of you?

Here’s another thing to think about: I don’t know if you’re like me in this regard, but when I was young I missed a LOT of come-one and signals. Now I know it when I see it, and I see it a lot when I’m paying attention or when I’m sending my own signals.


“I donno, but I like it!”

Nah, I don’t mean that. I do believe I know. I do like it - I’m mid 50s and I’ve pulled 20somethings and 30somethings in the past few years. Any younger than that and I’m just not interested, but I can see their attention and curiosity about me.

I believe younger women have always been into older men. If today they are being more forward and proactive about it, maybe it’s because today’s younger men could be less attractive than previous generations of young men.

I don’t know whether it’s a generalized truth or a false stereotype that young guys today are less studly, masculine, confident, energetic, funny, or are unattractive in other ways than previous generations of young guys. Maybe the older guys always experienced this asymmetry.

I know I missed a lot of signals when I was younger. Younger females and females my own age. Divorced at 40 and still missed a lot of come ons. When I was 46 my wife basically picked me up. Didn't realize she wanted sex the night we met. She left alone. A few nights later after meeting each other a few more times we ended up in bed. Nothing more than me going down on her that night. She said she knew I was good after that.
Looking back I realize that there were quite a few occasions that I missed out because I didn't catch the signals that were being sent my way.

 

[ADIDAS00]

Ask your wife. Supposedly she's chatting with an older man.

That’s true, she is!! I’ve asked her and she doesn’t have a good answer other than older men just turn her on.

 

[ADIDAS00]

It has never been an age thing really, more how guys of a certain age carry themselves. Younger guys now have grown up in an Instagram age where social media dictates how they act. Instead the people they interact with should dictate that.
There really is nothing worse than being out and about to have to fend off a guy who's approach is like a how to get a girl short story. The ability to be yourself instead of being a persona is lost on most men under 30.

Interesting! I can see what you mean. It’s probably tough being a younger man and only knowing what you see on tik tok. It must be difficult to know how to act and just be yourself

 

[Cool88]

The real deal it seem's to me they need some good nasty mature fucking or some body to really eat,lick and suck that pussy hole. It seem's many young guys will not suck pussy like these young women want it done real erotic and nasty.

 

[ThatIrishGirl]

The real deal it seem's to me they need some good nasty mature fucking or some body to really eat,lick and suck that pussy hole. It seem's many young guys will not suck pussy like these young women want it done real erotic and nasty.

I'll have to disagree. In my experience younger guys may not have the right skills to approach a guy yet but when you find someone you can chat to, they will listen and you can teach. Women of any age have expectations. Skill manners and respect are the same as someone saying "I'll suck your pussy hole" not so sure that approach would work with any female I know regardless of age

 

[MaturemanAJ]

I can only tell you what I have been told by females. They are tired of self absorbed, video game playing man childs. They want a real man and can only find them in mature men.