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UnquietDreams said:
I prefer the Stop Light: green is go, yellow is hold on, we'll talk a bit, red is full stop, done. Gives some flexibility.

Of course, I was with a partner I nicknamed Red. It became " green, yellow, rutabaga."
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I like a combination of the two. I think the safe word is the ultimate, sometimes easiest to think of in some moments. I also think this is an easier method for a submissive to utilize when he/she notices their dominant is needing that full stop.

A lot of people assume a submissive is the only one with things that would trigger a halt in play, or is the only one experiencing the massive surge of Adrenalin, serotonin, and other neuro chemicals that makes safe words or stop lights a requirement. But that is far from the truth.

Only, a dominant often does not have someone checking in on their needs during scene play. Which is another reason I’m a fan or utilizing a safe word in addition to the stop light method.

Dominants and submissives both experience issues, top space and drops. I’ve safeworded a dominant, I’ve been safeworded, and I’ve used a safeword for myself.

I love the stop light method. I agree with you and love the flexibility in it. This also allows for post scene play conversation to talk about what worked, didn’t work, what might need to change one way or the other.

I’m also a huge fan of checking in during play with yes or no questions when one thing changes and other begins, or breathing changes are noticeable, or you see changes in response. These yes or no question can be easily answered if you use the stop light method by responding green, yellow, or red.

Again, I nerded out. I can also go into all kinds of sciences. That’s another nerd-out though.
 
BrendaBear said:
I hope you are nice and comfy with “want”.. ‘cause my MamaBear senses are on full alert… the brats are all cubs to me as far as I am concerned….

https://media1.tenor.com/m/3nGczyTThUAAAAAd/shrenu-parikh-ek-bhram-sarvagun-sampanna.gif

*** okay, you are quite safe… I already know you are a good man… ***
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absolutely no harm in watching out for the folks you care about!!

But also, thank ya for the kind words in the aside. I do my best to be decent :)

Sleep well, y'all, I have a 12 hour in the office day ahead of me tomorrow, so it's about that time.
 
LustfulIntentions2 said:
absolutely no harm in watching out for the folks you care about!!

But also, thank ya for the kind words in the aside. I do my best to be decent :)

Sleep well, y'all, I have a 12 hour in the office day ahead of me tomorrow, so it's about that time.
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Joking and posturing aside, I truly think you are a good man and my comments were actually nothing to do with you… I hope you know that.

Now…sleep well… and I hope you have a wonderful, ice cold pepsi waiting for you when you awake!

….unless you are one of those coffee or tea types… 🙄🙄… then I hope you have one of those. 💋
 
Speaking of fuck me running, I think the entire gym turned around to watch a rather attractive young lady run on the treadmill in (how do I put it kindly) non-supportive wear.

I just left the gym. And there are random dudes all working out near the poor girl. She is going to need a translator for all the bro pick me up language she’s about to experience. God bless the young folk.
 
Rj_1954 said:
@UnquietDreams
I would tell you My safe word but my Domme commands me not too, she says...
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RJ…. Your safe word is “ unsalted-peanuts-with-a-light-coating-of-cheese ”! We all know this! We just keep trying to get you to negotiate changing it to “coffee-is-for-jackwagons”. Or… maybe that is just me suggesting that. 🤷‍♀️
 
Sammysub07 said:
I like a combination of the two. I think the safe word is the ultimate, sometimes easiest to think of in some moments. I also think this is an easier method for a submissive to utilize when he/she notices their dominant is needing that full stop.

A lot of people assume a submissive is the only one with things that would trigger a halt in play, or is the only one experiencing the massive surge of Adrenalin, serotonin, and other neuro chemicals that makes safe words or stop lights a requirement. But that is far from the truth.

Only, a dominant often does not have someone checking in on their needs during scene play. Which is another reason I’m a fan or utilizing a safe word in addition to the stop light method.

Dominants and submissives both experience issues, top space and drops. I’ve safeworded a dominant, I’ve been safeworded, and I’ve used a safeword for myself.

I love the stop light method. I agree with you and love the flexibility in it. This also allows for post scene play conversation to talk about what worked, didn’t work, what might need to change one way or the other.

I’m also a huge fan of checking in during play with yes or no questions when one thing changes and other begins, or breathing changes are noticeable, or you see changes in response. These yes or no question can be easily answered if you use the stop light method by responding green, yellow, or red.

Again, I nerded out. I can also go into all kinds of sciences. That’s another nerd-out though.
Click to expand...
During play, I do a lot of wellness checks as well, and will use a simple "red or green?" when we come to a point that is appropriate.

And I have "rutabagaed" out as well. (I also let the most submissive woman I was ever with tie me up, call me names, and rail me with a strap-on, but that is another story...) Yes, especially as the Dom, you have to really keep track of where you are, mentally.

It all goes into trust. I really have to trust someone before I can get into that type of relationship. (I am not a ONS guy in any sense. Hell, I have to get to a certain level before I even send a spicy DM here.) But that trust is what I am in it for. Beyond all of the pleasure, all the fun, all the intensity, it is having a person trust me, and me them that does it for me. And I have ended really fun relationships because that trust went away. I think I told the story in here, but I had a rope bunny who lied to me during wellness checks while I was tying her. She lost feeling in her arm, but didn't tell me as she liked the sensation. Scared the ever loving fuck out of me, but she was fine. Could have been nerve damage. Still shakes me, sometimes. But that was the end of that.
 
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