Charlie's Pervert Circus and Smartass Emporium

[SmokingFap]

Hello all. I've decided to start somewhat of a repository for my kinks, perversions, and fantasies, as well as my smartass commentary on life, pics of myself when I'm feeling naughty, links to videos I find arousing, links to music that I love, questions about sex that may not otherwise have threads on here, random thoughts on everything from blowjobs to football to music and cooking, and hopefully some fun interactions with my fellow perverts, smartasses, and otherwise fun folks. All are welcome, except just plain rude assholes. If you want to poke fun at me, at least make sure it's actually funny.

I'm absolutely shameless when it comes to sex, so feel free to ask me anything or share your own stories related to kinks, perversions, memories, and fantasies posted on here. Let's just make sure to keep everything within Lit rules. Most of the mods love me, but even they have red lines.

This may go over like a turd in a punch bowl, but if nothing else, it's something for me to do when it's slow on here or all of my friends have gone to bed. And at most, it could be fun for everyone.

So welcome to the circus, friends new and old.

Lit's biggest pervert and smartass,

Charlie

 

[Breaking_Dawn_Fantasy]

 

[SmokingFap]

For those who haven't seen me yet.

View attachment 2472769

 

[SmokingFap]

So, I'm a huge fan of vintage porn. And this is one of my favorite scenes from any movie. Annette Haven was an absolute goddess. And oh, to live in a world like this. Oral sex in the middle of busy restaurants...

https://xhamster.com/videos/barbara-broadcast-01theclassicporn-com-2299887

 

[SmokingFap]

From a post on a different thread. Just my one cent.

I prefer very large breasts, D-cup or bigger. But smaller ones are perfect on the right frame. To me, it's mostly about proportionality. And large, well-defined, and especially puffy areola are my ideal, whether on large or small tits.

And I'm not one of the guys on here who says that every pair of tits posted is perfect in its own way. That actually implies that all breasts are average. I believe in the bell curve. Most tits are in the average range (in terms of attractiveness, not just size). But there are many gorgeous and even perfect tits (for my tastes). And there are also many below-average and even ugly tits out there. I think it's lame and dishonest to claim that all breasts are amazingly beautiful.

 

[Hornymwtxn]

Let those of us who haven't received a bj in a crowded restaurant while classical music plays be the first to cast a stone of disapproval.

 

[SmokingFap]

Let those of us who haven't received a bj in a crowded restaurant while classical music plays be the first to cast a stone of disapproval.

I'd be happy to give one in a crowded restaurant with classic grunge music playing.

 

[SmokingFap]

This is one of my favorite new-ish songs.

 

[Hornymwtxn]

I'd be happy to give one in a crowded restaurant with classic grunge music playing.

Nirvana?

 

[Hornymwtxn]

I think this is right up your alley.

 

[SmokingFap]

Nirvana?

Sure! But I'm not as big a fan of Smells like Teen Spirit as most people. I prefer In Bloom. Would definitely go to town to Soundgarden or Pearl Jam, though.

 

[SmokingFap]

I think this is right up your alley.

Never heard of them before, but that's pretty hot, both musically and lyrically. But it makes me think of maybe the sexiest song I've ever heard.

 

[SmokingFap]

View attachment 2472785

Oh, fuck. You know me too well.

 

[SmokingFap]

For those who might be interested, here's how I wake up on most mornings.

https://postimg.cc/PCMZHTWK

 

[Hornymwtxn]

For those who might be interested, here's how I wake up on most mornings.

https://postimg.cc/PCMZHTWK

I told ya to go see Dr. Alice,
Not see Alice.

 

[SmokingFap]

View attachment 2472800

That's one of the hottest things I've ever seen.

 

[SmokingFap]

Its so fucking good, I mean can be discussed at length for a long while.

We could definitely write a story about that to publish on here. Or make it too twisted and just keep it to ourselves.

 

[SmokingFap]

For those of you who don't know, I'm the inventor, director, and producer of the infamous Dicks of Lit compilations. My last compilation, version 3.0, for some reason didn't include the music when I posted it. So I decided to go ahead and add music and post it again here. Also, since Lit now censors Dropbox links, I just put it on my Google Drive for all. Enjoy!

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1DhrlwWXLPGPoWk7b82pb2MiBd30WLIXg/view?usp=drivesdk

 

[SmokingFap]

And if folks would like me to repost versions 1.0 and 2.0 here, from my Google Drive for easier access, let me know.

 

[SmokingFap]

I may as well post my laundry list of fetishes, for those who might want to talk about mutual interests.

So. I'm obviously greatly aroused by pretty women smoking. Incest is my second biggest fetish. Both thanks to a very pretty mother who was very liberal about nudity around the house when I was growing up, and never without her Virginia Slims menthols.

In addition, I'm greatly turned on by pregnant and lactating women, watersports, fisting, anything anal, feminine transwomen, bisexual couples, hotwives, threesomes of any kind, orgies gangbangs and bukkake, exhibitionism, especially public masturbation, deepthroating and throat pies, extreme masturbation (huge or unusual objects and methods), light to moderate BDSM (no blood, but yes to tit and pussy slapping, nipple torture, and choking), Asian women doing anything, redheads doing anything, and a couple other things that might violate Lit rules. And any and all combinations of the above.

Please let me know if you share any of these kinks. And while this isn't a Personals Ad thread, PMs are always welcome.

 

[Hornymwtxn]

Tldr

Tits
Labias
Dicks
Rimming

 

[SmokingFap]

Tldr

Tits
Labias
Dicks
Rimming

Those all obviously do it for me, as well.

 

[Hornymwtxn]

Those all obviously do it for me, as well.

Well....
Rimming is kind of a no way in hell for me but had trouble coming up with anothe sex act starting with a R

 

[ImpishSeraph]

And if folks would like me to repost versions 1.0 and 2.0 here, from my Google Drive for easier access, let me know.

Do it, ya perv! This perv would enjoy it .."Thar she blows!"

 

[SmokingFap]

Do it, ya perv! This perv would enjoy it .."Thar she blows!"

For you, anything, my dear. Good to see you again. Need to hit your thread again, catch up on all your naughtiness.