thanks for sharing your experience, that sounds awesome!
Well said... the hard part is finding that one regular buddy, and harder depending where you are living. I have to believe that there are guys out there who share the same interests but keep it to themselves that make it hard to meet them.Amen to that!
In the early days I did take risks and met up with a number of different guys. It was a real thrill (nerve racking as hell though) to meet a new person - the anticipation and curiosity (how good will they make me feel? What is their cock like?) was a real turn on for me.
As I settled down and sort of satiated a lot of my curiosity, I began searching for one guy that I could be regular with - less risks, higher comfort level, more enjoyable to be with someone I knew and liked.
THAT has been incredibly difficult (nigh on impossible) to find!
I got incredibly lucky to stumble across one a number of years ago and all was great until I switched jobs and could no longer meet at his house.
Essentially been trying to find that again ever since.
These days I spend a ton of time trying to get a sense of someone before meeting, hoping to find that "right" guy. That is how I landed here on Literotica, hoping that the men here might be a better match for me -- more communicative and expressive.
I can host and identify as 'top' or 'versatile' (though as I've said previously I dislike labels because they don't even paint a fraction of the picture and likely you just got an idea of me in your head from those two words and I bet that idea isn't very close to the mark). Even with those two things going for me its still crazy difficult to find someone.
Example: I met up last month with a guy I had been chatting with a lot. He wrote well, was happy to exchange a lot of ideas, fantasies, etc, and in real life did have a good personality. Afterward he misunderstood a reply I wrote and got super negative and pissy (thinking I was rejecting him). Maybe my expectations are simply too high but I want to be with someone like myself - I don't love rejection but I at least try to understand the other person's perspective and I absolutely won't get mad about it. That is pretty darn narcissistic to think I would be a perfect match for everyone!
Sigh. Again I have rambled on. My point was to relate and say "me too!" and to add another side of it -- one where even when a few of the "big" things align it can still be frustratingly difficult to find the right person for me.
Couldn't agree more though - it truly is like the proverbial needle in a haystack!
Last thoughts:
1) As long as I'm not carrying on too many conversations at the same time I don't mind chatting about All Things Sexual with anyone - its a turn on to read (and write) about experiences, desires, etc. So feel free to reach out if you'd like.
2) I'm in west-central MA if anyone is near, available weekday late morning, and interested in striking up a conversation to see if we might be a match
3) I'm meeting someone next week so keep your fingers crossed for me! =) (in a neutral public space first to gauge interest before taking the plunge)
I agree that sites like doublelist have their share of less than desirable candidates, and does come with a fistful of risks. However there is also that chance of finding that diamond in the rough. One has to keep in mind when using those sites, to be careful and not put themselves completely out there to mitigate those risks.
For this sub-thread, does anyone think a new thread would be helpful? We could gather suggestions about which sites are lowest risk, how to go about using them (like using a new email address), and success/failure stories. If people here think it's a good idea, I'll start one.
67 M in TX.. would love to make the plunge from curious to experienced. Love to hear from like minded.
Absolutely. If I knew guys were clean and safe, I'd have to change my Lit name to ExperiencedinPennsylvania.
... and knowing who those guys were in addition to being clean and safe would help
Yes, but, you can't always guarantee discretion with people you know. Unfortunately, people talk.
interesting take on that, and I agree with you.
I do understand... as with most things more than a "pinky swear" is required.
My thoughts exactly... the stronger the friendship the more discretion there probably would be
Agreed, but how do you keep your private life from becoming public?
Absolutely! The only way I was ever able to play locally was with a guy I met on a business trip. Turned out we were both from the same town, attending different conferences.
Honestly I think this and Reddit are probably the best ways to meet up with people for a more stable relationship.
What you describe is why I almost exclusively play on business trips. Hosting in a hotel is so much better than getting busted in a car, bathroom, or trail.
Yeah I don't go on business trips I work local so car is usually my way and during summer, trails.
Mind if I PM you? No intention of being ever to meet in real life, just talk / share stories.
Also curious in the Vancouver area. I may try Steam1 (New West) in the future but a little worried I may be seen. Really want to explore though.
