What is the least helpful feedback you have ever got?

[MediocreAuthor]

An infinity-way tie for second place is "ANAL MEANS GAY SO FUCK YOUR GAY STORY IN ITS GAY ASS," except, you know, never quite that clever.

Wait, I am super confused.

Did they want a gay story and not get it? Or did they get gay story but not want it? I must know. Why was this person angry?

 

[ElectricBlue]

Wait, I am super confused.

Did they want a gay story and not get it? Or did they get gay story but not want it? I must know. Why was this person angry?

He no doubt was desperately trying to deny his true reaction, which was, "Fuck, yeah, I liked that," but won't admit it.

 

[MediocreAuthor]

He no doubt was desperately trying to deny his true reaction, which was, "Fuck, yeah, I liked that," but won't admit it.

That reminds me of Hannibal Buress' joke about racist comments on porn videos.

"Are you seriously being racist and masturbating at the same time?"

 

[Jmanchu]

I had an "anonymous" limped dicked, baby carrot sporting, moldy, diseased riddled, douche nozzle say this to me,

"Do the world a favor and kill yourself. Your family would be better off without you around."

Of course, I reported it to Laurel.
I don't know if anything came about from it.

"Aww projecting a little bit there, anon buddy? Well I hope you do world a favor and <i>not</i>kill yourself. As a fellow human being on this shitty planet I love ya too, no homo. Try spreading some positivity because you matter. "

 

[Seadog777]

"Aww projecting a little bit there, anon buddy? Well I hope you do world a favor and <i>not</i>kill yourself. As a fellow human being on this shitty planet I love ya too, no homo. Try spreading some positivity because you matter. "

Thanks.

 

[Jmanchu]

Thanks.

Hey no problem, my dude. I know how the internet be. While you deal with shitheads like that, sometimes kill em with kindness.

 

[tenyari]

I've received several in years past that were just completely blank. Back when ASSTR was live and you could upload your own webpage there, I had a page with a form and it was up there for many years without a function check to be sure anything had been typed into the text box... so every few months someone would go through the trouble of clicking my confirmation box to confirm they were an adult, fill in something in the email box, and then write no comment...

Even outside of that, I've gotten a few blank comments on other sites...

More recently I've gotten at least one that was just:

 

[Duleigh]

It's hard to say, most of the LEAST helpful feedback come from some guy named Anonymoose or something like that. But recently he sent me an email to convince me that my recent W was illegitimate. I had vowed to back off from contests, but then I got that email, I actually took it serious, but I don't run away, I ain't that kind o' dog, so it ended up being the most motivating feedback I ever got.

 

[MediocreAuthor]

It's hard to say, most of the LEAST helpful feedback come from some guy named Anonymoose or something like that. But recently he sent me an email to convince me that my recent W was illegitimate. I had vowed to back off from contests, but then I got that email, I actually took it serious, but I don't run away, I ain't that kind o' dog, so it ended up being the most motivating feedback I ever got.

Dude, I'm gonna say this outright... Your win was 100% legit.

Quality is all subjective, but your story was far and away my favorite of the winners. (No offence to 1st or 3rd lol)

 

[HordHolm]

The least helpful feedback has to be publishers who... don't give feedback. I understand why, sort of, but if they want to save themselves some time in the long run, some brief feedback is sometimes warranted even if it takes up a couple of minutes of their time.

 

[Kumquatqueen]

Where do I start?
One of my first on this site: "Mediocre poker story."
Mediocre, quite possibly, but there was no poking of any sort in the whole thing: Tell me what you want (it's all talking about what our MFC likes from kinky sex)

Or Denying Alex which not only triggered the incels (how sad!) but yielded gems like "Just No."

And "Good premise.
Disappointing story.
Simply listing what happened, not describing it in detail.
Two stars."

Yes, it was a 750-word story, announced as such at the top.

Sigh. Tbh I preferred "the author is the real sociopathic piece of shit" on the same story. I did add my own comment after that:
"Note to self: 'Rapeyfucker McBastardface' is clearly too subtle a way to describe a man as a *fucking* *bastard* *rapist*..."

 

[Zenith77]

Mmm. I could share much the same.

This thread suggests to me that we need an option to 'disable anonymous comments'.

In fact, better still, I'd like to see the site disable anonymous comments, by requiring an account to be able to read here.

 

[BobbyBrandt]

I found this one hard to beat (pun intended):

by Anonymous user on 01/15/2023
Pathetic junk written by a chronic masterbater for chronic masterbaters. 5 stars

I don't get many negative or abusing comments and I don't ever delete comments. I prefer to leave them for other readers to counter-attack on my behalf. Although, I have experienced comments being deleted by Laurel.

 

[alohadave]

I think Laurel must have seen it, and just thought it a little inappropriate.

Someone else may have reported it. I'll report comments that are abusive to the author.

 

[Bramblethorn]

Mmm. I could share much the same.

This thread suggests to me that we need an option to 'disable anonymous comments'.

It already exists.

In fact, better still, I'd like to see the site disable anonymous comments, by requiring an account to be able to read here.

This idea gets proposed every couple of months. It's overkill (most anon commenters are fine), it doesn't fix the problem (there are plenty of assholes quite willing to register an account if that's what it takes to be shitty) and it would probably kill the site (lots of readers don't want to create a record of their porn-reading habits).

 

[Zenith77]

It already exists.

Oh, thanks.

This idea gets proposed every couple of months. It's overkill (most anon commenters are fine), it doesn't fix the problem (there are plenty of assholes quite willing to register an account if that's what it takes to be shitty) and it would probably kill the site (lots of readers don't want to create a record of their porn-reading habits).

Fair.

 

[neuroparenthetical]

Wait, I am super confused.

Did they want a gay story and not get it? Or did they get gay story but not want it? I must know. Why was this person angry?

There's a rather large group of people, worldwide, who believe that any dude having anal sex of any kind is "gay" in a profound, overarching, fourth-wall-transcending way. If you write a story about a guy having anal sex with a girl - even giving, not receiving - the guy is gay, any man who enjoys reading about it is gay, and the author, if a man, is also gay. Further, the author has committed an unforgivable offense by spewing out the gayness into ostensibly non-gay parts of whatever smut site the loud, dumb, angry bigot is visiting.

I try to remember that a lot of those people are uninformed, misinformed, and even brainwashed - victims, to at least some extent. Plato's allegory of the fuckin' closet, am I right?

Of course, then I remember that the very same brainwashing that tells them that ANAL=GAY probably has something to say about them visiting a smut site in the first place.

 

[Zenith77]

I try to remember that a lot of those people are uninformed, misinformed, and even brainwashed - victims, to at least some extent. Plato's allegory of the fuckin' closet, am I right?

I think it reminds us that homophobia is merely an unwillingness to admit that, actually, not-a-small part of them is bi-curious.

 

[CyranoJ]

Can you beat this? I suspect the answer is likely to be yes.

I'm not sure, your example is pretty freaking funny.

My feedback experiences have been mostly positive, luckily for me. Anytime I've received feedback through Lit's private feedback system, or otherwise by e-mail about other stories elsewhere, it's usually been from appreciative readers. Where shenanigans have tended to happen from time to time is in the comments sections of stories.

In general, reader comments I will generally delete as unhelpful are people coming into a story category to tell me they're too virtuous to read the story I posted there, or to otherwise signal that my kinks are Wrong And Bad. These actually aren't strictly-speaking "unhelpful," as they're an unfailing signal that I made the story hot and dirty enough for someone to go out of their way to lie in public about how they're Totally Not Into That, Honest. But they're tiresome otherwise and basically qualify as spam.

Likewise, any story I post that has "interracial" elements is usually written from an angle that takes the piss out of racism and racist characters and specifically excludes the kind of bestial stereotyping a certain kind of IR is known for, and I know I've succeeded whenever someone shows up in the comments to shrill at me about being The Real Racist. But as a genre of feedback, Projection From Bigots is also otherwise more tiresome than useful and something I otherwise treat as spam.

I actually feel kind of bad about what my most solid contender for "least useful" is, because the example actually comes from someone who was working hard to be either "helpful" or.... just authoritative. But I got a very long "how you must rewrite this" comment -- two of them, actually, but one was an obvious example of sockpuppeting and was redundant, so I deleted it -- on a piece that I had made clear had long ago been written, edited, published in an anthology, and run its course. That's why it was appearing on Lit. Aside from that basic confusion, they also had some pronouncedly odd ideas, such as apparently believing that character development can only happen through dialogue. So, that was a weird one. Didn't have the heart to entirely delete it, though.

 

[EmilyMiller]

I'm not sure, your example is pretty freaking funny.

I have to read some of your stuff. I hate the black guy as savage beast aspect of interracial with a passion. Makes me want to vomit.

Em

 

[MediocreAuthor]

If you write a story about a guy having anal sex with a girl - even giving, not receiving - the guy is gay, any man who enjoys reading about it is gay, and the author, if a man, is also gay.

That is such a strange concept. Women and men both have hands and mouths... If a person believes all anal is gay, then would handjobs and blowjobs also be considered gay?

 

[Bramblethorn]

That is such a strange concept. Women and men both have hands and mouths... If a person believes all anal is gay, then would handjobs and blowjobs also be considered gay?

There are people out there who believe masturbation is gay because it gets a guy used to having a man's hand on his cock. There are people who believe washing one's arse is gay because it involves somebody (oneself) touching one's arse. And so on. Anything you can imagine, somebody out there has an argument for how it's gay.

 

[MediocreAuthor]

Alright, I got some pretty useless feedback today, on my story Fucky Friday, of course from an anon:

The idea of swapping sexes is great.
The rape is not.

If you don't like reading noncon/reluctance I TOTALLY understand. But why the heck would you read a noncon story? Particularly when the tagline is:

"Husband and wife switch bodies. Payback is a pain in the ass."

If you can't tell where that story is going from the tagline, I don't know what to tell you.

 

[RetroFan]

With a comment title of 'STUPID' the comment about my story was 'This was a stupid story. Such a stupid story.' Unfortunately, the commenter didn't say what aspects of my story they found stupid so I could hopefully avoid writing any more stupid stories in the future.

 

[Djmac1031]

I wrote a brother / sister incest story and received feedback from not one but two Anonymous individuals suggesting the brother expressed far too much reluctance at the idea of interacting in a sexual way with his sister, as if wanting to fuck your own sister should be the default position.