Senna Jawa
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- May 13, 2002
- Posts
- 3,272
-
wh,
2014-10-10
-
when i die
my decease will die with me
and our dreams
my decease will die with me
and our dreams
wh,
2014-10-10
-
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I've read this a few days ago in my trips
and I don't really understand it but it makes me melancholic.
Why?
I hope all is well.
I quite like this poem. It expresses (as I interpret it) my own agonsticism/atheism, but also one of the effects of death--that everything of myself ceases with my death, but that what we share with our loved ones also dies there as well. The last line makes the poem.-
when i die
my decease will die with me
and our dreams
wh,
2014-10-10
-
[...] (as I interpret it) my own agonsticism/atheism, but also one of the effects of death
I do find the lowercase "i" irritating, though. It's stylistic, but it draws attention to itself, which detracts from the poem.
Now let's go back to the issue. Simplicity and the default should be the lower case only. One should introduce the upper case only when there is a poetic reason for this--be it a proper name or grammatical "I", etc. Thus a mature poetry reader should understand that unless there is a special artistic reason, it is the upper case "I" which is irritating, draws attention to itself, detracts from the poem. Prose is prose, and poetry is poetry.
I could make finer points, I could go on and on but ... never mind .
placebo kills poetry
There is a beautiful poem from the early Internet (r.a.p.) which made me think about entropy. In my private correspondence with the author, he agreed with me, and even said that's what poetry is about in this example, or even in general. Since then I pay attention to entropy. I consider entropy to be one of important artistic means.I've read this a few days ago in my trips
and I don't really understand it but it makes me melancholic.
Why?
I hope all is well.