Kinkiest mainstream print books you have ever read.

[MediocreAuthor]

Okay, this sort of doesn't count, but I'll include it. At the local book store, I found a compilation of the 'Cannon' graphics novels by Wallace Wood.

The back cover of the book compared the character of Cannon to Archer, (which is a hilarious spy comedy) so I picked it up.

Reading through it, it was absolutely FILLED TO THE BRIM with female T&A, to a degree which had me absolutely rolling with laughter. It was beyond excessive, hilariously so.

I remember a particular page where a woman strips butt naked to get into her wetsuit, swims for one panel, and then gets butt naked again taking the wetsuit off. The villains and plots were all absurdly over the top. It was hysterical.

'Clearly,' I thought, 'This is the work of a comedic genius, who is lampooning the over-sexed, ridiculous spy thriller genre.'

It was one of the funniest comedies I ever read... it was so fucking over the top, but it never broke character. It played everything incredibly deadpan.

You know why? It isn't a comedy. I found out later. All of those absurd nude scenes? The ridiculous over-the-top plots? Cartoons villains? They were not intended to be funny. It was all supposed to be serious.

That makes it even funnier, if you ask me.

 

[Winter_Fare]

Archer! I forget that exists off to binge watch right now.

 

[gunhilltrain]

Crash, by J. Ballard--about a group of people who find sexual ecstasy in being involved in car crashes.

Crash struck me as anti-erotic. Not that it was against sex, but rather that it was mostly about our fascination with technology and machines and our almost unconscious wish to destroy it all. I'm wondering if one of the many causes of wars is the - satisfaction? - of destruction for its own sake.

 

[amber1312]

Jedders land Maureen o’donoghue

 

[djrip]

Palimpsest by Catherynne Valente

But I don't really read a lot of kinky books oddly enough...

hm, that one's on my shelf. Better get to it...

 

[djrip]

Okay, this sort of doesn't count, but I'll include it. At the local book store, I found a compilation of the 'Cannon' graphics novels by Wallace Wood.

The back cover of the book compared the character of Cannon to Archer, (which is a hilarious spy comedy) so I picked it up.

Reading through it, it was absolutely FILLED TO THE BRIM with female T&A, to a degree which had me absolutely rolling with laughter. It was beyond excessive, hilariously so.

I remember a particular page where a woman strips butt naked to get into her wetsuit, swims for one panel, and then gets butt naked again taking the wetsuit off. The villains and plots were all absurdly over the top. It was hysterical.

'Clearly,' I thought, 'This is the work of a comedic genius, who is lampooning the over-sexed, ridiculous spy thriller genre.'

It was one of the funniest comedies I ever read... it was so fucking over the top, but it never broke character. It played everything incredibly deadpan.

You know why? It isn't a comedy. I found out later. All of those absurd nude scenes? The ridiculous over-the-top plots? Cartoons villains? They were not intended to be funny. It was all supposed to be serious.

That makes it even funnier, if you ask me.

Okay that one I've got to look for.

Edit: Oh, good!

 

[Euphony]

Oh my goodness! I remember that book. I haven't thought about it for years. That's the one where Grover implores readers not to keep turning the pages, because there's a monster at the end, but of course they keep doing so.

Not very "kinky," though. Unless muppet monsters are a thing for you.

Non-conning helpless monsters REALLY turns my crank.

 

[MediocreAuthor]

Non-conning helpless monsters REALLY turns my crank.

View attachment 2264793

Did you ever considered that you are, in fact, the monster?

 

[MediocreAuthor]

Okay that one I've got to look for.

Edit: Oh, good!

As you read it, with all of its ridiculous over-sexed nonsense, just remember that I read the whole thing too, cackling like a psycho... safe in the knowledge that it was the most hilarious, tongue-in-cheek humor imaginable. Finding out that it was all created sincerely was an absolute shock to me.

I mean, ffs, there aren't very many pages that don't have an inexplicably naked woman. Haha

 

[Euphony]

Did you ever considered that you are, in fact, the monster?

This memorandum is to notify you a written warning has been issued and will be added to your permanent HR file.


Sincerely,
E

 

[djrip]

As you read it, with all of its ridiculous over-sexed nonsense, just remember that I read the whole thing too, cackling like a psycho... safe in the knowledge that it was the most hilarious, tongue-in-cheek humor imaginable. Finding out that it was all created sincerely was an absolute shock to me.

I mean, ffs, there aren't very many pages that don't have an inexplicably naked woman. Haha

skimmed first 14 or so and haven't found a clothed woman yet...

 

[SimonDoom]

Non-conning helpless monsters REALLY turns my crank.

View attachment 2264793

Hmmmm. Grover kink. Should we worry?

 

[SimonDoom]

Did you ever considered that you are, in fact, the monster?

We're all the monster, kid.

 

[Euphony]

Hmmmm. Grover kink. Should we worry?

Grover got off easy.

I made Snuffleupagus DISAPPEAR.

 

[MediocreAuthor]

skimmed first 14 or so and haven't found a clothed woman yet...

So thanks to you I found what I was referencing.

I remember a particular page where a woman strips butt naked to get into her wetsuit, swims for one panel, and then gets butt naked again taking the wetsuit off.

So she takes her clothes off to get in her wet suit

And she swims for one panel:

Aaaand... Naked again. Lmfao

 

[Euphony]

So thanks to you I found what I was referencing.

So she takes her clothes off to get in her wet suit
And she swims for one panel:

Aaaand... Naked again. Lmfao

In her defense, she damn near HAD to rush out of that suit.

It's clearly suffocating her phat ass.

 

[MediocreAuthor]

In her defense, she damn near HAD to rush out of that suit.

It's clearly suffocating her phat ass.

I'm not entirely convinced she didn't just paint it on.

Poor girl... It's riding STRAIGHT up her all her cracks. Most unpleasant, let me tell you.

 

[Euphony]

I'm not entirely convinced she didn't just paint it on.

Poor girl... It's riding STRAIGHT up her all her cracks. Most unpleasant, let me tell you.

What I am desperate to know is why an armed nuclear sub clearly stocks a child's medium wetsuit.

Labor laws aren't enforced 12+ miles out?

 

[Euphony]

I'm not entirely convinced she didn't just paint it on.

Poor girl... It's riding STRAIGHT up her all her cracks. Most unpleasant, let me tell you.

Please, say more on your MULTIPLE ass cracks.

Also, how's your sister been?

 

[MediocreAuthor]

Please, say more on your MULTIPLE ass cracks.

Also, how's your sister been?

View attachment 2264799

My assertion was that a suit that tight would ride up in other places too.

If you catch my -incredibly unsubtle- hint

 

[Euphony]

My assertion was that a suit that tight would ride up in other places too.

If you catch my -incredibly unsubtle- hint

I will feign ignorance for comedy on the regular.

Looking dumb for smarter comedy is my offering to my gods.

*Church of Barry Zuckerkorn*

 

[Euphony]

My assertion was that a suit that tight would ride up in other places too.
View attachment 2264800
If you catch my -incredibly unsubtle- hint

Your pussy has callouses?

She getting it on the page and off!

 

[MediocreAuthor]

I will feign ignorance for comedy on the regular.

Looking dumb for smarter comedy is my offering to my gods.

*Church of Barry Zuckerkorn*

View attachment 2264803

We appreciate your sacrifice!

 

[Inthesewalls]

Not sure how mainstream these are but I got them on Amazon - H.D Carltons Haunting Adelaide series. Woman inherits a haunted house, catches the attention of a vigilante hitman who becomes obsessed with her. Theres non- con, at one point he uses the butt of his gun to pleasure her, ghost, very rough sex, some sex trafficking, it goes on and on. Its pretty popular which is how I came across it. The first book is pretty good, the second one was insanely dark.

Pretty much any book by Charity B has all the trigger warnings. One of them (Skeleton King)is a sex based retelling of Nightmare Before Christmas with the focus on Jack being a body snatcher. That one has necro- fair warning. Then RIP which is brother sister incest where sister hears voices and ends up killing people. They are rescued by their cousin who also is criminal and sort of joins their relationship with his current gay lover. It suprised me how far Amazon let them go with some of these.

I read Anne Rices Beauty series at way too young of an age but thats fairly graphic as are most of her novels at some point.

 

[Euphony]

We appreciate your sacrifice!

It's also good cover for times when I'm legitimately stupid.

Best.Religion.EVAR.