I'm disappointed because of my atheism

[OlderFitterWiser]

In continuation to THIS thread, I'll tell you about my (lack of) religious beliefs.

Until two years ago, I believed in God. Not necessarily in a specific religion; my faith was without hard and fast rules.

I was still a bitter asshole, but at least back then, my belief in some sort of God and afterlife gave me hope. The hope that someday, in another world, I would get to experience all the things I missed out on in this life, either because of my own mistakes or because of the circumstances.

Until I watched a video on Youtube that made me realize how stupid the arguments I based my faith on were, that I had no more evidence to believe in God than I had to believe in fairies, unicorns etc.

And now, without a God to give me hope, I don't know where to go from here. There are times I have nightmares. The thought that I'm doomed to perish in the grave comes in my sleep and causes me to wake up and be unable to sleep again.

Other atheists tell me that I shouldn't feel like that, that the finality of death makes our finite existence all the more worthwhile. Maybe that's a way to see it, but for me it's not enough. Ever since I found out there is nothing after death, everything seems meaningless to me.

Maybe I can still get friends. Maybe I can still start a relationship with my parents and siblings. Maybe I can still find myself a girlfriend. So what? Will any of this matter in my eternal nonexistence? Will it matter whether I lived my life to the fullest or wasted it?

I can't get over that feeling of hopelessness.

Check out Jeffery Mishloves; New Thinking Allowed channel on YouTube.

Definitely lots of evidence of an afterlife.

 

[Wat_Tyler]

Judaism and atheism are quite compatible.

And his preoccupation with an afterlife is very Christian.

Ask a rabbi about the afterlife and you’ll probably be told to stop worrying about what happens after you die, and start thinking about how to live RIGHT NOW.

Jesus' teachings was far more Eastern than what the church bombards its adherents with. Hell, they forget that Jesus was Jewish. Too bad that most spiritual pursuits are mislabeled as religion. And most so-called atheists are mislabeled as well. They are really anti-theists. A true atheist doesn't give a fuck what you believe or even if you believe.


Just. Be. Present. It's not all that difficult, really . . . .

 

[ToPleaseHim]

I’m an atheist and I have not previously encountered another atheist lamenting the way you are. I suspect you are actually at odds with yourself, logically concluding that there is no omniscient creator while also having (and clearly wanting) faith that there is one. I would encourage you to read more, explore more content than one YouTube video. (FWIW, I have also never heard a Christian become atheist after watching one video. Please share that link - it must be a doozy!)

Like others have mentioned, I think you are likely struggling with depression and should seek help for that from your Dr or a psychiatrist.

Finally, one thing I think is great about churches is the community. I found a local organization called “Freethought ________ (insert name of city in the blank).” I haven’t gone to their meetups in years, but when my kids were little it was great for us and we would meet up for casual gatherings, volunteer work, etc.

 

[Bob_Bytchin]

I mean, what's the point of having relationships with friends, family, and women when you know that death will tear you apart forever?


I was raised in a Christian environment, but since my mid teens, the Bible stories seemed too childish for me to take seriously. Nevertheless, in the greatest part of my life, I believed in God in general. I still want to believe. I wish there were a God, but wanting something to be true does not make it true.

I was raised in a Christian family, and my second wife was a Pentecostal. So you're having an existential crisis, and with your logic, nothing matters. Yes, everything comes to an end, and eventually everyone who knew you will die, so there will be no memory of you on Earth. So what?

Go back to your church already.

 

[RoryN]

Or a troll post.

I'm starting to think you're right.

 

[JohnSm123]

On this side, I have lived a life with faith, hope and love, and using the bible as a directive, have been a much better person. Yet if there is no external life on the other side, I have not lost anything.

On the contrary, I lost a very young son, and I have this hope that I will see him again someday, that is a hope and peace that no atheist can lay claim to. If they are right, then it is what it is and it is just a false hope...

But here is the big part; if atheists are wrong; than that is a mistake that they will eternally regret.

As a side note, you are disappointed because you lost hope. I am disappointed too; I have a headstone where my son's life should be, but I have hope at least that I will one day see him in heaven. Because of that, I am not nearly as disappointed as I could be. More so, I can help give hope to other parents who have lost children, so they are not so disappointed. They in turn can do the same. But atheists? All they can do is mock me for being "stupid". Go ahead, if I am right, I have won twice...

I tried to adopt a similar way of thinking soon after I became an atheist. "I can just hope. Maybe, against all odds and logic, there is a God, I will get reincarnated someday yada yada." However, the next moment, I realized all that was the third stage of depression: bargain. (The five stages of depression are: denial, anger, bargain, despair, and acceptance.) Is it really healthy to stay in a bargain phase for the rest of my life?

 

[JohnSm123]

I’m an atheist and I have not previously encountered another atheist lamenting the way you are. I suspect you are actually at odds with yourself, logically concluding that there is no omniscient creator while also having (and clearly wanting) faith that there is one. I would encourage you to read more, explore more content than one YouTube video. (FWIW, I have also never heard a Christian become atheist after watching one video. Please share that link - it must be a doozy!)

Like others have mentioned, I think you are likely struggling with depression and should seek help for that from your Dr or a psychiatrist.

Can a psychiatrist save me from eternal nonexistence?

Finally, one thing I think is great about churches is the community. I found a local organization called “Freethought ________ (insert name of city in the blank).” I haven’t gone to their meetups in years, but when my kids were little it was great for us and we would meet up for casual gatherings, volunteer work, etc.

What I don't like about those communities is their denial of truth. Whenever you bring up something that challenges their beliefs, they get mad. One time, I was hanging out on a religious forum, and when I brought up something that proved there are contradictions/errors in their "holy" book, I was instantly banned permanently. (At least that time I knew why I was banned. )

 

[BrightShinyGirl]

Can a psychiatrist save me from eternal nonexistence?


What I don't like about those communities is their denial of truth. Whenever you bring up something that challenges their beliefs, they get mad. One time, I was hanging out on a religious forum, and when I brought up something that proved there are contradictions/errors in their "holy" book, I was instantly banned permanently. (At least that time I knew why I was banned. )

It’s hard work to convert to Judaism, but at least Jews won’t get pissed off if you point out contradictions in the scriptures. Arguing over Torah is expected and welcomed.

There’s an old saying: “Two Jews, three opinions.”

 

[Martles]

I’ve been an atheist about as long as I’ve been bisexual. Probably no connection except my identity.

But religion then didn’t welcome boy-boy sex though their institutions certainly practised pederasty.

Ive no big regrets about either but still don’t think male only ‘Christian’ schools are a healthy idea.

Dava

 

[HumpDayHoratio]

John, it seems to me you’re crying out for help.

My suggestion. Go seek professional help. You‘ve gotten some good commons sense advice over your two threads but you seem to not heed any of the sage advice given.

At the risk of offending my fellow Shithouse Phycologists here (I’m including myself as one), seeking advice for making friends off an anonymous sex site seems to be a cry for help. In my professional opinion…

Seek out a professional.

Having said all that. I’ll give you my two cents. Start small. Get a dog. Love the dog. The dog will love you back. Take dog to dog park. Meet like minded doggy people. Make a friend on common ground of dogs. If you can’t make a friend, at least you have the dog. Dogs love unconditionally…

Above all, DON’T BE AN ASSHOLE.

If for some reason you don’t like dogs, or are allergic. Then find another hobby to try to build a bridge.

As for the great beyond, and the great spirit in the sky? Roll the dice brother. Once you break on through to the other side…what does it matter if it’s lights out or you’re walking through the pearly gates?

What‘s the line from the old song? I HOPE there is no heaven and I PRAY there is no hell!

 

[Wat_Tyler]

That’s because you get to make up whatever version of God suits you.

Don’t be dismayed. It’s total BS, but a lot of denominations cater to it to put asses in seats and coins in coffers.

Easy-Believeism is the religion of today.

I learned more about a god trying to help some poor bastard in a nut ward or a prison than I ever did sitting in a church pew. The first thing to understand is, if I could understand god, then s/he wouldn't be god.

 

[Wat_Tyler]

That is a good start. Most people today are looking for a God that is so tiny he can be fully understood, and taken out and put away as needed

And that ain't god . . . .

 

[gunhilltrain]

You mean to delude myself into believing fairy tales? Is there a point? Will that save me from eternal death in the end?

John, you still have answered my questions from the other thread.

1. If you did have this eternal life, what would you do with it? What would you like to do with it? Since you don't seem to be doing that much in this life, what do you hope to accomplish in the next one? Would you accept eternal damnation, if that was the option imposed on you?

2. Do you really want to deal with your friends and relatives - their souls, anyway - even a thousand years from now? What you you talk to them about at that point? News from back on Earth? "Did you see that the Yankees won the AD 3,024 World Series?" Probably they'd be on their sixth or seventh Yankee Stadium by that point.

Eternity is a long time, and yet a lot of people yearn for it anyway.

https://www.manhattantimesnews.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/09/Photo322-768x679.jpg

 

[gunhilltrain]

"Even if mods tell me they won't ban me, I still know they will, because there were other forums in the past in which mods told me the same thing, and I still ended up banned without knowing why and without anyone ever responding to my emails. My verdict is that I lack social skills. But it's too late to get them in my 36 years of age. It's not something specific I do in real life or a specific rule I break online: it's the general aura I emit that puts off people around me."

If lacking social skills and being annoying got people banned on Lit, then most of the membership on here would be gone in about four months. That is not it. Way back, at the beginning, you admitted that you were flouting Lit's age limit rule. That is more likely a cause.

 

[TallMan69]

“Most people today are looking for a God that is so tiny he can be fully understood, and taken out and put away as needed”

That’s actually pretty profound. And I’d agree with that. A sad statement on religion/theology nowadays. Even our religion is transactional! Funny and sad at the same time?! Hmmm

 

[JohnSm123]

1. If you did have this eternal life, what would you do with it? What would you like to do with it? Since you don't seem to be doing that much in this life, what do you hope to accomplish in the next one? Would you accept eternal damnation, if that was the option imposed on you?

2. Do you really want to deal with your friends and relatives - their souls, anyway - even a thousand years from now? What you you talk to them about at that point? News from back on Earth? "Did you see that the Yankees won the AD 3,024 World Series?" Probably they'd be on their sixth or seventh Yankee Stadium by that point.

I'll open another thread about that soon, because that too is too complicated to mix with this thread's topic.

 

[Beholders_Eye]

In continuation to THIS thread, I'll tell you about my (lack of) religious beliefs.

Until two years ago, I believed in God. Not necessarily in a specific religion; my faith was without hard and fast rules.

I was still a bitter asshole, but at least back then, my belief in some sort of God and afterlife gave me hope. The hope that someday, in another world, I would get to experience all the things I missed out on in this life, either because of my own mistakes or because of the circumstances.

Until I watched a video on Youtube that made me realize how stupid the arguments I based my faith on were, that I had no more evidence to believe in God than I had to believe in fairies, unicorns etc.

And now, without a God to give me hope, I don't know where to go from here. There are times I have nightmares. The thought that I'm doomed to perish in the grave comes in my sleep and causes me to wake up and be unable to sleep again.

Other atheists tell me that I shouldn't feel like that, that the finality of death makes our finite existence all the more worthwhile. Maybe that's a way to see it, but for me it's not enough. Ever since I found out there is nothing after death, everything seems meaningless to me.

Maybe I can still get friends. Maybe I can still start a relationship with my parents and siblings. Maybe I can still find myself a girlfriend. So what? Will any of this matter in my eternal nonexistence? Will it matter whether I lived my life to the fullest or wasted it?

I can't get over that feeling of hopelessness.

If you are serious about resolving your dilemma, I recommend this book:
"Mere Christianity" by C.S. Lewis. Treats the subject without reference to 'religion' or 'dogma' or 'denominations'. Has been my go-to reference for many years. Available from many sources (probably your local library even). This URL is from Amazon. I dare you....

https://www.amazon.com/Mere-Christi...e+christianity'&qid=1691181790&s=books&sr=1-1

 

[TallMan69]

That is a classic for sure and by about as famous of a theologian and good writer as you can get. I was just thinking about re-reading the Narnia series. Here’s one less hurdle to reading it for your edification if interested. This is a link to a free e-book of that one in PDF format.

http://ntslibrary.com/PDF Books/Mere Christianity - Lewis.pdf

 

[Beholders_Eye]

That is a classic for sure and by about as famous of a theologian and good writer as you can get. I was just thinking about re-reading the Narnia series. Here’s one less hurdle to reading it for your edification if interested. This is a link to a free e-book of that one in PDF format.

http://ntslibrary.com/PDF Books/Mere Christianity - Lewis.pdf

Handy e-book reference there. And, I am in the midst of re-reading the Narnia books for perhaps the nth time. It feels like every few years I have to go back to Narnia. I like to read them in the order they were published, as opposed to the modern numbering based on Narnian chronology; I am 'old-school' on that.

 

[Wat_Tyler]

William James wrote a heavy tome called The Varieties of Religious Experience. I call it "the vagaries of religious experience", but it indicates that for those who want to believe, it matters more that they believe than what they believe.

 

[FGB]

I don't have it in me to be an atheist. I have seen too much, heard too much and had to deal many times with God's insertion into my life. Oh, when I first joined up I could give any heathern sinner here a run for the money!
That started changing when I asked Jesus to come into my life.

I had ignited the fuse on some serious dynamite and like most people did not realize it. It is not a membership easily left behind... if you are on the list YOU stay on the list! If God has to get your attention, he has many ways to do it some you may not like, and ALL will freak you out.

To experience raw power of that magnitude exercised for what seems to me very little reason other than I belong to him is very sobering and thought provoking.

There is nowhere to run to and no way to hide!

 

[gunhilltrain]

I'll open another thread about that soon, because that too is too complicated to mix with this thread's topic.

John, how many threads are you going to start? Frankly, the ones you already have mostly ain't that interesting. If you don't even believe in the afterlife any longer, then don't worry about it. Start a thread about the history of major league sports facilities, which might actually be worth talking about.

 

[JohnSm123]

John, how many threads are you going to start?

Is there a limit to how many I have the right to open before I get banned? Come to think of it, was that the reason I got banned on the other forums? Had I opened too many threads?

 

[JohnSm123]

I don't have it in me to be an atheist. I have seen too much, heard too much and had to deal many times with God's insertion into my life.

Tell me about those times. Back when I was a theist, I too interpreted some incidents in which I got lucky as divine intervention, but as I gradually became an atheist, I realized they were nothing more than coincidences. But if you can convince me your stories were not coincidences, I'm listening.

 

[gunhilltrain]

Is there a limit to how many I have the right to open before I get banned? Come to think of it, was that the reason I got banned on the other forums? Had I opened too many threads?

Jesus H. Christ, John, you are either the world's most persistent troll (and not a particularly good one at that) or you're completely nuts. No, I don't think the number of threads will get you banned. Although you could try an experiment and open a couple hundred of them and see what happens. You got anything better to do?

Maybe you really are an AI entity as someone suggested.