MiddleAgedMan
Preoccupied writer
- Joined
- Sep 29, 2015
- Posts
- 93
Hi, chapter one is out, please have a read here: Bloodlines Ch.01
Quick summary: Garth awakwens from a savage beating to discover his uncle is invovlved in it. Their bloodline is has granted them powers of mental influence over others. Who knows how a young man would choose to use such a power?
As some of you may have seen from my previous forum posts over the last couple of weeks, this story was originally written as fanfic, based on Brandon Sanderson's Mistborn series. But since Mind Control by default has an element of noncon, I hit my head against the proverbial brick wall of Laurel's very strict guidlines. While I still somewhat disagree with the rejection, I thought it a fight not worth spending energy on and redesigned the plot to one of my own making. Thank you, Sextified, for pointing that out to me. For those familiar with Mistborn, this will be evident, I think, but that is mostly because I am lazy and did not want to do a complete re-write of my some 30.000 words already on paper.
However, backdrop aside, I wanted to start a thread for two purposes. I wanted to be able to have a proper discussion about my writing style and ways of improving it. Not to be arrogant, but I'm quite confident in my grammar, though I know I tend to write long sentences, the kind with lots of commas rather than separate sentences, as I have been warned against. (See my point?)
I also want to get an active discussion going about story developement, I have lots of plans and ideas, some more or less contradictory, and I have som major plot twists planned, though depending on where the story goes, those twists can be set for a later date.
Chapter two is all but finished, I have written all of it, I just need to adapt it to my own plot as it is currently written for my Mistborn fanfic. This is less of a job than it might seem, though it will likely take a few days; a couple of scenes need to be completely rewritten as well.
The future of this series is something I very much want you all to help me mold, I want to write this as something you want to read and appreciate. My intention is for young Garth to stumble and fall a few times, that is more or less taken care of in the next couple of chapters, but for the longer term, I intend to send him down a spiraling descent into depravity, culminating in a plot twist that takes the whole series to a new stage, so to speak. Again, this mostly penned out, if only in my mind yet.
What I want to know from you is: What should Garth be doing in the chapters leading up to the plot twist? Does he start playing with the local college students? Does he corrupt his little gang of friends? Maybe he just sits down at a cafe and start messing with random people passing by? Lots of options, many of them possible to combine.
Chapter two will also introduce a few more optional paths for him to go down, but my overall take is the good old saying, the way to hell is paved with good intentions. Garth has powers of influence after all, and some people could use a little adjustment, for their own good, of course...
I hope we can work together to make this a long and entertaining story, my depraved mind has all sorts of fun encounters planned out, and while this all sits comfortably in the MC category, I am very much fascinated by EV, BDSM, Anal, noncon (Kind of mandatory in MC), group sex and lesbian encounters. Maybe some twins sisters will appear at some point, and perhaps Garth can use his powers to make them act on their secret desire for each other?
I have some hard limits however, and comments suggesting this will simply be ignored; no generational incest (father/daughter, uncle/niece and so on, that power dynamic repulses me), no scat/wet sex, only mild fetish (at my discretion) and no mature characters in sexual contexts, not my cup of tea. I have no problem with some gay activity, though none of my male characters swing that way. However, in a twenty-person orgy, there's bound to be some that swing both ways at least.
With that, I leave the comment field up to you.
Njoy!
Quick summary: Garth awakwens from a savage beating to discover his uncle is invovlved in it. Their bloodline is has granted them powers of mental influence over others. Who knows how a young man would choose to use such a power?
As some of you may have seen from my previous forum posts over the last couple of weeks, this story was originally written as fanfic, based on Brandon Sanderson's Mistborn series. But since Mind Control by default has an element of noncon, I hit my head against the proverbial brick wall of Laurel's very strict guidlines. While I still somewhat disagree with the rejection, I thought it a fight not worth spending energy on and redesigned the plot to one of my own making. Thank you, Sextified, for pointing that out to me. For those familiar with Mistborn, this will be evident, I think, but that is mostly because I am lazy and did not want to do a complete re-write of my some 30.000 words already on paper.
However, backdrop aside, I wanted to start a thread for two purposes. I wanted to be able to have a proper discussion about my writing style and ways of improving it. Not to be arrogant, but I'm quite confident in my grammar, though I know I tend to write long sentences, the kind with lots of commas rather than separate sentences, as I have been warned against. (See my point?)
I also want to get an active discussion going about story developement, I have lots of plans and ideas, some more or less contradictory, and I have som major plot twists planned, though depending on where the story goes, those twists can be set for a later date.
Chapter two is all but finished, I have written all of it, I just need to adapt it to my own plot as it is currently written for my Mistborn fanfic. This is less of a job than it might seem, though it will likely take a few days; a couple of scenes need to be completely rewritten as well.
The future of this series is something I very much want you all to help me mold, I want to write this as something you want to read and appreciate. My intention is for young Garth to stumble and fall a few times, that is more or less taken care of in the next couple of chapters, but for the longer term, I intend to send him down a spiraling descent into depravity, culminating in a plot twist that takes the whole series to a new stage, so to speak. Again, this mostly penned out, if only in my mind yet.
What I want to know from you is: What should Garth be doing in the chapters leading up to the plot twist? Does he start playing with the local college students? Does he corrupt his little gang of friends? Maybe he just sits down at a cafe and start messing with random people passing by? Lots of options, many of them possible to combine.
Chapter two will also introduce a few more optional paths for him to go down, but my overall take is the good old saying, the way to hell is paved with good intentions. Garth has powers of influence after all, and some people could use a little adjustment, for their own good, of course...
I hope we can work together to make this a long and entertaining story, my depraved mind has all sorts of fun encounters planned out, and while this all sits comfortably in the MC category, I am very much fascinated by EV, BDSM, Anal, noncon (Kind of mandatory in MC), group sex and lesbian encounters. Maybe some twins sisters will appear at some point, and perhaps Garth can use his powers to make them act on their secret desire for each other?
I have some hard limits however, and comments suggesting this will simply be ignored; no generational incest (father/daughter, uncle/niece and so on, that power dynamic repulses me), no scat/wet sex, only mild fetish (at my discretion) and no mature characters in sexual contexts, not my cup of tea. I have no problem with some gay activity, though none of my male characters swing that way. However, in a twenty-person orgy, there's bound to be some that swing both ways at least.
With that, I leave the comment field up to you.
Njoy!
