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Be proud old guys!

So @NeonSubtlety reminded me yesterday that not everyone knows all the various names and titles @NRJLIVES4ever has tried out on his cock. Therefore, today seems a good day to recount some of them.

As noted, he originally called it the Dodge Ram. Damn copyright issues.

Second one wasn't very original or inspiring: Poke-her. Followed by his obsession with Pokémon: Poke-she-mound.

His third effort was much better, although still somewhat juvenile: The Schlong of Sasquatch.

As you can see, they ran the gambit from juvenile to copyright infringement to alliteration. He started focusing more on that and I would include them in stories to try:

Wondrous Wang
Skin Saber
@NRJLIVES4ever 's Big Johnson
Dong of Danger
Killer Cock
Pussy Plumber

Once, when an adjunct for a college class on Physics of all things, the coeds had a name for him: The Nutting Professor.

He still plays around with names, hoping to find that one that sets him apart from everyone for eternity. But it will have to be the epitome of the prowess that @NRJLIVES4ever strives for and what women expect.
 
So some of you might not know this, but Leonardo Dicaprio is friends with @NRJLIVES4ever . When you think about it, it makes sense. But how did this happen?

Scrolling through the archives, I found the diary @NRJLIVES4ever kept in the times before he met me. They were not well written and the doodles were worse than Helen Keller would draw.

Anyway, I decided to go to the archives today. It was in the late 90s and our hero had found his stride in getting with the babygirls. Still new to it, but starting to get recognized for his prowess.

One day, he's roaming Hollywood and slams a young babygirl like he was tenderizing a T-bone. After he left HIS growing pains all over her face, she said her mother was in the TV business and invited him to a reunion special.

While there, he met the cast and crew behind the show as well as Leo as everyone called him. They were comparing war stories when another young hottie approached them. They decided to share instead of penis wrestling. (Like arm wrestling, but with your penis).

They both attacked her like two scurvy pirates fighting over and devouring the first orange they've seen in months. The poor girl was ravaged and savaged senseless and both men were asked to leave.

They did and discussed this problem over coffee. How could they both live on the same planet and fuck women like that? Clearly not as a dynamic duo of domination as they had hoped.

Finally, they compromised. @NRJLIVES4ever would take babygirls between 18 and 19 while Leo would only be banging babes from 20 to 25. After 25, it was a grab and growl, no holds barred. Although they found they rarely did that.

Now you know why @NRJLIVES4ever focuses on babygirls the way he does.

The more you know...
 
I know the babygirls training in @sallysparrow23 's academy are not old enough to remember, but once upon a time,there was a Friday night lineup of TV called T.G.I.F.

Most people have used that abbreviation for Thank God It's Friday. ABC used it that way too although sometimes they tried to use the word Funny instead. This was a weekly occurrence during school year Friday's for many years and it was generally good TV.

I know, I know: What does this have to do with @NRJLIVES4ever and the babygirls he's banged for his legend?

Well, like all things surrounding the mystique of @NRJLIVES4ever...there is a story.

Remember the Leo Dicaprio story? That was not his only venture into television or the MILF producers. He had actually seduced one years earlier.

While relaxing in between bouts of love making (after all, older women are beautiful lovers), she was talking about work. @NRJLIVES4ever was mainly listening for anything relating to 18 or 19 year old babygirls on set and was only halfway paying attention.

The MILF suggested some snazzy promotional lines, but she could see they fell on deaf ears. She kept trying more and more, some absolutely ludicrous. But @NRJLIVES4ever was not moved to support any.

Finally, he had enough and told her it was time for more. As only @NRJLIVES4ever can do, he pleased her like a blanket fort makes @barefootgirl69 swoon. This time though he took the MILF's ass and she was rowdy.

Afterwards, exhausted and finally broken, she asked about the promotional thought again.

"T.G.I.F, baby," he responded and zipped up. She looked confused and he sighed, "Thank God It Fit." She was processing, thinking if he meant that the shows aligned correctly to be in the lineup. He shook his head and smacked her ass...and THEN she got it.

"I can't put that on ABC!" She was mortified. @NRJLIVES4ever shrugged and left.

As we see, the MILF used the acronym, but changed the associated words little, no one any the wiser and her looking like a genius.

I caught up to her recently as I detailed the life of @NRJLIVES4ever and asked her about this story from his diary.

She admitted that the original meaning was about her ass. But she changed it to Friday because that's the day of the week she was nailed by @NRJLIVES4ever

She's never had sex since as a vow of atonement to his cock and her way of thanking God that it fit.
 
The legend of @NRJLIVES4ever and his wundersclong is growing bigger than Paul Bunyan's endowment. I'm not sure which head is swelling faster, but from the sounds of it, the lower one never shrinks.

He may need to start claiming Scottish descent so he can switch to kilts. Even the baggiest jncos won't be able to hide it before long.
 
ZfrkS62 said:
The legend of @NRJLIVES4ever and his wundersclong is growing bigger than Paul Bunyan's endowment. I'm not sure which head is swelling faster, but from the sounds of it, the lower one never shrinks.

He may need to start claiming Scottish descent so he can switch to kilts. Even the baggiest jncos won't be able to hide it before long.
Click to expand...
His head isn't swollen. @NRJLIVES4ever forever just has big heads. :p

And he had to stop wearing kilts after he kept tripping waitresses.
 
I know that many people find these totally true stories of @NRJLIVES4ever to be fictional. However, they are totally true and confirmed. Not just by me, @sallysparrow23 , or @barefootgirl69 , but by legions of well-stretched former babygirls.

While some stories are fun and some are sad, others even confuse and bewilder @NRJLIVES4ever himself. In fact, the story of the original babygirl is one of them.

A few weeks ago, @NRJLIVES4ever was minding his business, walking around town. Suddenly, he got a text message from an unknown number:

"Call me. I'll help you cum Daddy"

The next text told him where to go and when to be there. A picture followed and it was definitely a hot babygirl, although somehow familiar. But with all the banging of babygirls over the years, how can you remember just one?

He shrugged and headed out. He came to a house in a nice neighborhood. He knocked and the girl opened the door, more or less wearing dental floss as a bikini.

She smiled and led him to the couch. She set him down, handed him the PS5 controller and a Zima, before putting her hair up and going down on the massive member she let loose from his pants.

@NRJLIVES4ever stared at her, noticing her technique was fine, but what was he supposed to do with a controller and a Zima? Zima...? What was it @ToPleaseHim had said one time about Zima?

Then it hit him!

"You're @Amybear0416! You're not real!" He whipped his wang from her mouth, knocking her sprawling as her two front teeth scattered around the room.

Suddenly the back door slammed open. "Daddy's home!" And who should stroll in but @Pwhalen4415!

"You don't exist!"

He Whips out his cock and @NRJLIVES4ever was in the jock joust of his life as the babygirl on the floor tried to find both teeth.

"You weren't real! You both were fake!" @NRJLIVES4ever shrieks as he slams his salami in a thrust that the other can't quite parry.

@Pwhalen4415 falls backwards over the babygirl and @NRJLIVES4ever forever smashes the Zima bottle over his head. It passes straight through!

"There's no such thing as ghosts! @NRJLIVES4ever yells, running from the house as he frantically stuffs his trouser snake back in his pants.

A voice over stops him in the yard:

"You'd best start believin' in ghost stories, Ms. Turner. You're in one!"


"What the fuck!?"

And @NRJLIVES4ever wakes up on his couch, THE PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN playing on TV. He breathes heavily and calls up a babygirl. He needs a cleansing fuck after that. He fucked one who was honored by the booty call and he slept like a baby.


The next dat, he went to the address. No house, just an empty lot. But as he looks around he sees it...a smashed bottle of Zima....
 
So I have some stories still to tell, but I wanted to jump ahead to today's story while it was fresh in mind.

Being the father of young boys, I often associate their belligerence and competitive nature with the yesteryear of the playground. (Ironic considering where this thread is housed here).

Anyway, shortly after a certain post by @LustfulIntentions2 about his penile prominence, @NRJLIVES4ever reached out.

"Do you think it's true about his prominence?"

"Most women will tell you that guys are prone to exaggeration," I remind him.

"I don't. "

"Yes, but that's because you've had mastery over your bulbous boner longer and have greater control. @LustfulIntentions2 must have recently grown into his." Knowing that @NRJLIVES4ever is the reigning babygirl lover, I'm not sure where this is going.

"Should I find out?"

"Does it matter?" I ask. "What if he's more so? Are you ready to cede your throne?"

You could see him wrestling with it...ultimately deciding that he wanted to see about truth in advertising.

He called out @LustfulIntentions2 on the playground. He arrived with their entourages in tow. @barefootgirl69 , @OrdinaryPerson , @sallysparrow23 , and others on the side of @NRJLIVES4ever with members like @Wand3rlust and @SalaciousMonkey22 on the other. @AmberLGreen was roaming around too, but she mainly stayed on the swings.

Both men met in the middle of the playground and whipped out their skin sabers, both extensive in length like boner broadswords. They gripped them firmly and jousted all over the playground.

The whipping of those large lady lightning rods brought 40 mph gusts of wind and chilled to the bones all the spectators, especially the women who were now showing their distracting...points...

The men turned and twisted, parried and thrusted. Finally, the duel was at end as @LustfulIntentions2 was vanquished, lying exhausted on the ground as his sword shrank to more manageable size.

"You are an admirable foe," @NRJLIVES4ever graciously noted, "but there can be only one. Learn to use your cock wisely and it will reward you for years to come." @LustfulIntentions2 nodded in respect and hobbled off the field.

@NRJLIVES4ever smiled and invited all the ladies for a ride on his well-serviced schlong...and you've never seen happier women on a merry-go-round like that.
 
Last edited:
13Fantasies said:
So I have some stories still to tell, but I wanted to jump ahead to today's story while it was fresh in mind.

Being the father of young boys, I often associate their belligerence and competitive nature with the yesteryear of the playground. (Ironic considering where this thread is housed here).

Anyway, shortly after a certain post by @LustfulIntentions2 about his penile prominence, @NRJLIVES4ever reached out.

"Do you think it's true about his prominence?"

"Most women will tell you that guys are prone to exaggeration," I remind him.

"I don't. "

"Yes, but that's because you've had mastery over your bulbous boner longer and have greater control. @LustfulIntentions2 must have recently grown into his." Knowing that @NRJLIVES4ever is the reigning babygirl lover, I'm not sure where this is going.

"Should I find out?"

"Does it matter?" I ask. "What if he's more so? Are you ready to cede your throne?"

You could see him wrestling with it...ultimately deciding that he wanted to see about truth in advertising.

He called out @LustfulIntentions2 on the playground. He arrived with their entourages in tow. @barefootgirl69 , @OrdinaryPerson , @sallysparrow23 , and others on the side of @NRJLIVES4ever with members like @Wand3rlust and @SalaciousMonkey22 on the other. @AmberLGreen was roaming around too, but she mainly stayed on the swings.

Both men met in the middle of the playground and whipped out their skin sabers, both extensive in length like boner broadswords. They gripped them firmly and jousted all over the playground.

The whipping of those large lady lightning rods brought 40 mph gusts of wind and chilled to the bones all the spectators, especially the women who were now showing their distracting...points...

The men turned and twisted, parried and thrusted. Finally, the duel was at end as @LustfulIntentions2 was vanquished, lying exhausted on the ground as his sword shrank to more manageable size.

"You are an admirable foe," @NRJLIVES4ever graciously noted, "but there can be only one. Learn to use your cock wisely and it will reward you for years to come." @LustfulIntentions2 nodded in respect and hobbled off the field.

@NRJLIVES4ever smiled and invited all the ladies for a ride on his well-serviced schlong...and you've never seen happier women on a merry-go-round like that.
Click to expand...
giphy.gif
 
13Fantasies said:
I know it seems like she's applauding my journalistic integrity, but really she's been begging me to find a fun way to use the word "boner" and "boner broadsword" is her favorite alliteration about @NRJLIVES4ever 's cock to date.
Click to expand...
Beautiful babygirl babes beg to be boned by @NRJLIVES4ever 's behemoth boner broadsword with bluesy boner jams blaring in the background.
 
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