Masturbation for comfort

Recently I realized that sometimes even when I'm not in the mood I'll still diliberately try to get myself aroused so I can masturbate to give myself some kind of comfort or ease loneliness. That sounds kind of sad lol but I think everyone gets lonely at times. Being unattached and free is fun and allows me to have casual encounters and all kinds of adventures and I love it but sometimes you lay alone late at night and the lack of connection hits you. Has anyone else experienced this before?

I've been with my wife for 10 years, and when you're going through a rough patch you can sometimes be lying there with your partner beside you and still feel a profound lack of connection.

As far as masturbation goes, I started at 12 and the only period of my life since that I havent done it at least once a day was when I went through Basic Training.

SassyLady87 said:

Recently I realized that sometimes even when I'm not in the mood I'll still diliberately try to get myself aroused so I can masturbate to give myself some kind of comfort or ease loneliness. That sounds kind of sad lol but I think everyone gets lonely at times. Being unattached and free is fun and allows me to have casual encounters and all kinds of adventures and I love it but sometimes you lay alone late at night and the lack of connection hits you. Has anyone else experienced this before?

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This is pretty much normal.

SassyLady87 said:

Recently I realized that sometimes even when I'm not in the mood I'll still diliberately try to get myself aroused so I can masturbate to give myself some kind of comfort or ease loneliness. That sounds kind of sad lol but I think everyone gets lonely at times. Being unattached and free is fun and allows me to have casual encounters and all kinds of adventures and I love it but sometimes you lay alone late at night and the lack of connection hits you. Has anyone else experienced this before?

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It's worse when there's someone, but they're 1000 miles away. The snuggling is nice, when I was single I had women literally KICK me outta bed. Sex is fun, balls to the wall (literally, lol), broken furniture, orgasms till dawn fucking is GREAT...but snuggling on a Sunday morning dawn is rare, and ever moment needs to be remembered.

Then a brunch Mimosa and back to orgasms again

TheWhiteBull said:

I've been with my wife for 10 years, and when you're going through a rough patch you can sometimes be lying there with your partner beside you and still feel a profound lack of connection.

As far as masturbation goes, I started at 12 and the only period of my life since that I havent done it at least once a day was when I went through Basic Training.

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I guess what you could call what I'm going through with my wife a 'rough patch'. I have found myself many times lying beside her in bed, feeling disconnected, and I've masturbated lying right there beside her (it is a king size bed). I guess I do get a bit of comfort from it.

SassyLady87 said:

Has anyone else experienced this before?

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As I get older, masturbation when feeling as you describe only accentuates the unmade connections and lonely feelings.

More power that it somewhat comforts you.

SassyLady87 said:

Recently I realized that sometimes even when I'm not in the mood I'll still diliberately try to get myself aroused so I can masturbate to give myself some kind of comfort or ease loneliness. That sounds kind of sad lol but I think everyone gets lonely at times. Being unattached and free is fun and allows me to have casual encounters and all kinds of adventures and I love it but sometimes you lay alone late at night and the lack of connection hits you. Has anyone else experienced this before?

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Works great for stress too

SassyLady87 said:

Recently I realized that sometimes even when I'm not in the mood I'll still diliberately try to get myself aroused so I can masturbate to give myself some kind of comfort or ease loneliness. That sounds kind of sad lol but I think everyone gets lonely at times. Being unattached and free is fun and allows me to have casual encounters and all kinds of adventures and I love it but sometimes you lay alone late at night and the lack of connection hits you. Has anyone else experienced this before?

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interesting observations. even when my wife was in baby-making mode, she just wanted, for the most part, to get "it" over with. so, even when I was getting "it" on a regular basis, something was missing.

now, after years in a sexless marriage, I've become adept at masturbating and masturbate according to my mood ... to provide what I am missing. I love to edge and edge and can do so for hours, or I can give myself a satisfying "quickie." There's a need to satisfy or, as you might say, an area that needs to be comforted. Yes, it does feel lonely if you are alone or attached, but it does satisfy a need and allows for a measure of relieving stress or it provides much needed sex play with someone you love.

I say: continue to have fun -- give your body and mind what you need.

SassyLady87 said:

Recently I realized that sometimes even when I'm not in the mood I'll still diliberately try to get myself aroused so I can masturbate to give myself some kind of comfort or ease loneliness. That sounds kind of sad lol but I think everyone gets lonely at times. Being unattached and free is fun and allows me to have casual encounters and all kinds of adventures and I love it but sometimes you lay alone late at night and the lack of connection hits you. Has anyone else experienced this before?

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For me personally, I'd be very careful to attach masturbation to loneliness in my mind. I would much rather attach it to empowerment. All it takes is a simple switch in the mind - it's a shift in mindset, and outlook.

RacyWilde said:

For me personally, I'd be very careful to attach masturbation to loneliness in my mind. I would much rather attach it to empowerment. All it takes is a simple switch in the mind - it's a shift in mindset, and outlook.

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I understand what you're saying and reading back I think I didn't explain it correctly. It's more of missing having a connection and feeling alone then using something that makes you feel good and fulfilled (like masturbation) to connect with yourself in a deeper way. That strong connection you make with yourself drives away, to some degree, the feeling that you are alone. Does that make sense? It's too early for my brain to work properly lol

There are times that I do it out of habit and there are times I do it for the base enjoyment of giving myself pleasure, all depends on my mood, if I've had sex with my wife recently etc..

SassyLady87 said:

I understand what you're saying and reading back I think I didn't explain it correctly. It's more of missing having a connection and feeling alone then using something that makes you feel good and fulfilled (like masturbation) to connect with yourself in a deeper way. That strong connection you make with yourself drives away, to some degree, the feeling that you are alone. Does that make sense? It's too early for my brain to work properly lol

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Yeah, I understand. I actually have this guy that I love to watch masturbate and I'm a little jealous of how much he enjoys himself...lol. He does it on his own and sends me the videos afterwards. The vids are totally amazing... How he enjoys himself -
he's so sensual and sexy, the way his body moves, his noises and what he does to himself. It is never just the plain old lay on the back and working the cock with his hand - blah. He is on his knees and active, rubbing his hands all over his body, squeezing his balls and playing with his ass... He's very vocal too. He makes me crave him. He has actually taught me a lot about enjoying myself.

RacyWilde said:

Yeah, I understand. I actually have this guy that I love to watch masturbate and I'm a little jealous of how much he enjoys himself...lol. He does it on his own and sends me the videos afterwards. The vids are totally amazing... How he enjoys himself - he's so sensual and sexy, the way his body moves, his noises and what he does to himself. It is never just the plain old lay on the back and working the cock with his hand - blah. He is on his knees and active, rubbing his hands all over his body, squeezing his balls and playing with his ass... He's very vocal too. He makes me crave him. He has actually taught me a lot about enjoying myself.

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More, please!

spawnofdavey said:

There are times that I do it out of habit and there are times I do it for the base enjoyment of giving myself pleasure, all depends on my mood, if I've had sex with my wife recently etc..

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There are times when I've left the bedroom, unable to sleep, after having had sex with my wife only hours (or even minutes) before and then have masturbated in my recliner in the living room. It's not that the sex with my wife wasn't satisfying, it's just that she's rarely up to more than one go at it anymore and, at 60, I'm still pretty insatiable. It's even more erotic when her scent is still on my penis, and I then smell it on my hand throughout the session.

I also use it for "comfort" in another way. I had a cervical spine injury many years ago, and subsequent fusion surgery at C5-6 and C6-7. I got about two years relatively pain free after surgery before additional problems developed above and below the fusions (to be expected). At this point, my neurosurgeon says it's not bad enough for further surgical intervention and I'm not sure I'd let them to it again anyhow. So, I just cope with the pain, sometimes take NSAIDS, and even more rarely a narcotic pain reliever/analgesic. There are times when, not wanting to medicate, I have found that masturbation and the accompanying release of endorphins will be me enough pain relief to get me over the hump so I can fall asleep. So, I guess I'm self medicating, with endorphins, and the delivery method is masturbation.

UnderMyKilt said:

I also use it for "comfort" in another way. I had a cervical spine injury many years ago, and subsequent fusion surgery at C5-6 and C6-7. I got about two years relatively pain free after surgery before additional problems developed above and below the fusions (to be expected). At this point, my neurosurgeon says it's not bad enough for further surgical intervention and I'm not sure I'd let them to it again anyhow. So, I just cope with the pain, sometimes take NSAIDS, and even more rarely a narcotic pain reliever/analgesic. There are times when, not wanting to medicate, I have found that masturbation and the accompanying release of endorphins will be me enough pain relief to get me over the hump so I can fall asleep. So, I guess I'm self medicating, with endorphins, and the delivery method is masturbation.

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Check out quietlylooking's "Arousal during migraines?" thread, at http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?t=1179679.

makes

SassyLady87 said:

I understand what you're saying and reading back I think I didn't explain it correctly. It's more of missing having a connection and feeling alone then using something that makes you feel good and fulfilled (like masturbation) to connect with yourself in a deeper way. That strong connection you make with yourself drives away, to some degree, the feeling that you are alone. Does that make sense? It's too early for my brain to work properly lol

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Makes perfect sense to me. Gotta love yourself!!!

RacyWilde said:

For me personally, I'd be very careful to attach masturbation to loneliness in my mind. I would much rather attach it to empowerment. All it takes is a simple switch in the mind - it's a shift in mindset, and outlook.

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Agreed Racey

During my pregnancy, my partner sometimes had to be out of town and I missed him very, very much. At night I would get into bed naked, and roll onto his side of the bed where I could smell his scent on the sheets and pillow and masturbate thinking of him. I had some very intense orgasms.

MeredithEighty8 said:

During my pregnancy, my partner sometimes had to be out of town and I missed him very, very much. At night I would get into bed naked, and roll onto his side of the bed where I could smell his scent on the sheets and pillow and masturbate thinking of him. I had some very intense orgasms.

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That's quite hot...

I certainly understand where you're coming from, Sassy. Sometimes, masturbation makes me feel whole. In times of pressure, stress or lonliness, it allows me to tune out the world for awhile and focus solely on my own needs and pleasure. Sometimes, I liken it to making love to myself.....not just a quick orgasm or release, but a time when I can feel.....really feel...I don't know what I'd do without it.

michael2956 said:

I certainly understand where you're coming from, Sassy. Sometimes, masturbation makes me feel whole. In times of pressure, stress or loneliness, it allows me to tune out the world for awhile and focus solely on my own needs and pleasure. Sometimes, I liken it to making love to myself.....not just a quick orgasm or release, but a time when I can feel.....really feel...I don't know what I'd do without it.

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That is lovely.