Anybody want to help give feedback on my first story?

C

cum_dump_whore86

Guest
I've written my first erotic story ever and I'm pretty sure it sucks. I'm not very good experienced at this though and I'm not sure what I could do to make it better or more realistic. I thought that instead of sifting through the thousands of 'volunteer editors' who may or may not be active and interested in the type of story I wrote, I thought it might be easier to find one through this forum. Its a story told from the first person perspective from the standpoint of a slut who is basically addicted to cock and makes it her life purpose to worship cock and be a receptacle for cum. If that's the type of thing you're into or at least willing to read (the feminist inside me was definitely pretty horrified by some aspects of the story), send me a private message and I'll figure out a way to send it to you either on here or we can exchange e-mail addresses. It definitely needs help with organization, wording (it gets redundant), and plot development/details. Thank you!
 
I've written my first erotic story ever and I'm pretty sure it sucks. I'm not very good experienced at this though and I'm not sure what I could do to make it better or more realistic. I thought that instead of sifting through the thousands of 'volunteer editors' who may or may not be active and interested in the type of story I wrote, I thought it might be easier to find one through this forum. Its a story told from the first person perspective from the standpoint of a slut who is basically addicted to cock and makes it her life purpose to worship cock and be a receptacle for cum. If that's the type of thing you're into or at least willing to read (the feminist inside me was definitely pretty horrified by some aspects of the story), send me a private message and I'll figure out a way to send it to you either on here or we can exchange e-mail addresses. It definitely needs help with organization, wording (it gets redundant), and plot development/details. Thank you!

Here you go! Editor's Forum
 
I've written my first erotic story ever and I'm pretty sure it sucks. I'm not very good experienced at this though and I'm not sure what I could do to make it better or more realistic. I thought that instead of sifting through the thousands of 'volunteer editors' who may or may not be active and interested in the type of story I wrote, I thought it might be easier to find one through this forum. Its a story told from the first person perspective from the standpoint of a slut who is basically addicted to cock and makes it her life purpose to worship cock and be a receptacle for cum. If that's the type of thing you're into or at least willing to read (the feminist inside me was definitely pretty horrified by some aspects of the story), send me a private message and I'll figure out a way to send it to you either on here or we can exchange e-mail addresses. It definitely needs help with organization, wording (it gets redundant), and plot development/details. Thank you!

Love to give some feedback - pm me!
 
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