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Squealz said:
Any guys that try to pick a fight in a bar by being bitchy deserve to have a Justa slap them down, cool story, very amusing.
Flashing security cams is funny but you do it every time and it becomes boring!!!
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yeah idk, not that cool but my bitchy ass thought it was funny.

regularly flashing security cams can totally be funny. In middle and high school, one of my best friends lived in a house between a trailer park and a metal factory (clearly we were all upper class and shit). Her parents were both super strict and total lenient. Like she had to be home by 9pm, but anything went in the house. We could drink and smoke, guys could stay all night, whatever. anything highly illegal had to move to the back yard. Given she could never come out, I went there a lot to see her. So one night during truth or dare, I was dared to flash the metal factory's security camera. It became a thing. Like every time I walked by. If I forgot, someone reminded me. must have flashed that thing 1000s of times over the years.

Anyway one day, I was in the mall (it was where people bought clothes back then), and this man comes up and is like "hey, I know you". I have no idea who he is but try to play it off, oh hi, how are you. he says I am good, I work night security at the metal factory. so yeah, oh so there is actually someone there at night working security, the place isn't just empty,,,,um ok Hi.

Yeah still flashed it every time I walked by after. It had to be done, it was tradition. And we still thought it was funny. Of course we were stoned a lot and though the pink flying elephants and water were funny (hey, it was the 90s)



whenagain said:
I’d watch tv with you.
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well thanks, though the goal of that outfit is usually to get my husband to hang out with me and not watch tv, but i watch tv while i wait.
 
AlliaPotestas said:
Love this! Never understood why people can’t just live and let live ffs - life’s too short to worry about how anyone else live’s their life. Never stop being you :rose:

psst - don’t be getting too jealous of men, we multi-orgasm way easier than they do - so they can keep their peeing standing up, I think we win in the battle of the sexes :D
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thanks,

yeah I do feel really bad for men and the whole multi-orgasm things. I mean I am surprised sex would even be all that fun cumming only once or twice. seems like a lot of effort for not so much reward. I think sex has to be way more fun for us.
 
Justadesperatewifeandmom said:
they weren't even the screws that came with the product (I know by sight), likely been reusing the same screws for 30 years lol, and yeah I didnt even touch them before I saw I had a big problem and no drill.

FYI though, when women whine, they don't normally want to be told how to fix them problem. Most want sympathy and reassurance. Personally, I want "haha, sucks to be you, but hey at least your day didn't involve rats, go ahead ask about my day" then I want to laugh at how it sucks to be you too.

yeah I am fun like that. When it sucks to be you though, I will happily try to top with a funny story about how it sucks to be me.

And thank you, yes my boobs can be fun for those into the whole cartoon character massive beach ball thing.
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From reading your thread you didn't strike me as the type to seek sympathy and reassurance.

So, sucks to be you, at least your day didn't involve fire ants!
 
vwnut said:
From reading your thread you didn't strike me as the type to seek sympathy and reassurance.

So, sucks to be you, at least your day didn't involve fire ants!
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oh those fuckers. yeah I may be known to torch, randomly poison, or just take a scoop from one mound and move it to another just to piss them off. The first time I came down south, I learned ants could bite, before then i ignorantly believed there were only sugar ants (I was a kid). It has been war ever since (a losing one on my property). gotten them in my shoes, pants legs, ugh.

though saw one chick get them in her bathing suit bottom while sitting on the ground, the dance and screaming was not so pretty, but maybe a little funny if you are bit sadistic, so does your day beat fireants in a bikini bottom.
 
Justadesperatewifeandmom said:
thank you



Well thanks. glad I am not boring (Yeah I feel boring lol)

Yeah, I actually have a huge list of who I screw criteria that guys who work out excessively often don't meet. i mean many do, but a lot don't. I guess I am old school and out of touch, but I kind of have some strict gender roles when it comes to what turns me on and off about men. I like my men to be more masculine than me. (Yeah I am apparently self absorbed as most of my criteria, I am the base line) So I like men who are stronger than me, have more body hair than me, do not have better groomed eyebrows than me (that annoys me), do not wear more make up or hair products than me, do not take longer to get ready than me, do not want to screw men more than me, have more stereotypical male hobbies and mannerisms than me, do not cry more than me, do not bitch or whine more than me, are not more emotional than me, are not more afraid of common things than me, are not more bat shit crazy than me, do not have sluttier underwear than me, do not walk better in heels than me (that one really annoys me), do not smell girlier than me, do not get falling down drunk quicker than me, are not more into fashion than me, do not own more jewelry than me, do not watch chick flicks more than me, etc etc. In general, I expect men I screw to be tougher (or at least fake it well), less feminine than me. I wanna be the girlie one all the time I am with a man.

A lot of the guys who work out excessively, also groom excessively, take forever to get ready etc etc. and whine a shit ton. It starts to read as more feminine than me, and I no longer find them attractive. of course, some men can totally do the athletic thing without crossing into metrosexual. I like sweaty hard working men, please go cut down something, build or fix something, get dirty etc etc, just yeah, if your bath products are taking up more space than mine, it isn't going to work for me (not a big fan of a mans clothes taking up more space in the closet than mine either. fuck the whole big closest is mine....fine you can have like 7 inches in the backside (I'll take 7 inches in the backside later...k ..thanks)

Yeah I totally suck, and I am a totally politically incorrect, have total double standards etc. Two women making out is hot, two men turn off. Masculine men are attractive to me, and feminine women are attractive to me. Now don't get me wrong, I have gay and more effeminate male friends and some really butch lesbian friends who i love spending time with very much, I'm just not screwing them (well 99 times out of 100 anyway). I wouldnt think they would be into me for that matter, I am likely not girlie enough.

hum, now i might share what I thought was a funny story about a night I was in a redneck bar (ok that isn't all to uncommon, but the events in the bar were interesting)


thank you


thank you
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Your words are pretty much an exact echo of my wife’s thought when I first met her, and they ring true to this day. Thank you for sharing.
 
Justadesperatewifeandmom said:
thanks,

yeah I do feel really bad for men and the whole multi-orgasm things. I mean I am surprised sex would even be all that fun cumming only once or twice. seems like a lot of effort for not so much reward. I think sex has to be way more fun for us.
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I can multi-orgasm--sometimes. :p But probably only through masturbation.
 
Shaughn2323 said:
Your words are pretty much an exact echo of my wife’s thought when I first met her, and they ring true to this day. Thank you for sharing.
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I think it is something many women feel. Some of my circle of friends, well me as a career computer geek married to a concrete finisher (then stay at home dad as made the most financial sense) now carpenter, the biologist married to the carpenter turned stay at home dad back to carpenter, the business exec with the mechanic turned stay at home dad back to mechanic, the biochemist with the line layer, veterinarian with the linesmen, ad exec with the mechanic. White collar women in positions usually held by men, switching from dating white collar men, to and eventually marrying blue collar men. Idk maybe I just run with weird chicks who like men who are good with their hands and get real dirty.

EndlessNameless said:
I can multi-orgasm--sometimes. :p But probably only through masturbation.
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Ok but can you do it 10 to 20 or more times in a session given the time. See why I want an Enrique. Idk, I have met men who could a couple times maybe, but not to the completely lost count and you practically forget where you are, your name, and maybe how to breathe level lol.
 
Justadesperatewifeandmom said:
so at work, bored, about to go on a noon conference calls (which was only scheduled last night, i have no idea what it is about so I don't know if i need to pay attention) usually little notice but some notice calls tend to be about why we suck (projects get more notice, emergency problems get no notice)

I have no fun ideas at the moment, so will just default to same old same old

http://i.imgur.com/dnPdj5Tm.jpg

hopefully my meeting give me ideas lol
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oh my goodness gracious, how gorgeous!!
 
I enjoyed your security cam story, especially since I work for a company that develops software for CCTV systems. I have been on site many times, usually trouble shooting ip network infrastructure, I can tell you all control rooms have a stash of clips of people like you flashing the cams, having sex in front of cams, masturbating in full view of cams and other activities. Nice to know someone that contributes to making those guys shifts more interesting 😊
 
jc1213 said:
oh my goodness gracious, how gorgeous!!
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Well thank you.


Squealz said:
I enjoyed your security cam story, especially since I work for a company that develops software for CCTV systems. I have been on site many times, usually trouble shooting ip network infrastructure, I can tell you all control rooms have a stash of clips of people like you flashing the cams, having sex in front of cams, masturbating in full view of cams and other activities. Nice to know someone that contributes to making those guys shifts more interesting 😊
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Yeah I think I might have liked it better when I thought no one ever watched the feeds unless some crime or something happened. Now I am wondering if I have porn videos that I didn't film with my own crap cameras. Guess that depends on if someone watches hotel elevators, hotel stairwells, and parking lots. Maybe some others. I guess something to think about haha.
 
Justadesperatewifeandmom said:
so at work, bored, about to go on a noon conference calls (which was only scheduled last night, i have no idea what it is about so I don't know if i need to pay attention) usually little notice but some notice calls tend to be about why we suck (projects get more notice, emergency problems get no notice)

I have no fun ideas at the moment, so will just default to same old same old

[url]http://i.imgur.com/dnPdj5Tm.jpg[/url]

hopefully my meeting give me ideas lol
Click to expand...

wow..... always a very sexy look right there
 
Ok, firstly, sorry to all the guys in CCTV control rooms, I have blown that whistle.
Secondly, the systems are much smarter than people know. If there is movement on a cam it will trigger an alert to the control room, so even if no one is actively watching the screens they will see the list of alerts when they come in. They click on the alert and it will play the video of you in the elevator having fun. You can set it so small objects won't set it off, but I'm afraid your boobs are way past that threshold 😉
 
frmtutanota said:
wow..... always a very sexy look right there
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Well thank you.

Squealz said:
Ok, firstly, sorry to all the guys in CCTV control rooms, I have blown that whistle.
Secondly, the systems are much smarter than people know. If there is movement on a cam it will trigger an alert to the control room, so even if no one is actively watching the screens they will see the list of alerts when they come in. They click on the alert and it will play the video of you in the elevator having fun. You can set it so small objects won't set it off, but I'm afraid your boobs are way past that threshold 😉
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Yeah yeah my boobs set off motion alerts lol, but I assume so does everyone cuming or going. I just figure I would totally slack and be playing on my phone if it was my job to watch video in a high traffic low crime area. I mean there are better things to watch than me. OK maybe me screwing a guy in an elevator is more interesting, but people are in and out of elevators all the time, hence I would totally be slack and not even notice 2 people in an elevator. Maybe people just aren't as lazy as me lol.
 
Justadesperatewifeandmom said:
oh those fuckers. yeah I may be known to torch, randomly poison, or just take a scoop from one mound and move it to another just to piss them off. The first time I came down south, I learned ants could bite, before then i ignorantly believed there were only sugar ants (I was a kid). It has been war ever since (a losing one on my property). gotten them in my shoes, pants legs, ugh.

though saw one chick get them in her bathing suit bottom while sitting on the ground, the dance and screaming was not so pretty, but maybe a little funny if you are bit sadistic, so does your day beat fireants in a bikini bottom.
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Ha!! Mine actually came pretty close!

I was moving my riding mower from the garage to the backyard and must have scalped a mound with the mower. Caught some movement out of the corner of my eye, and saw hundreds of them swarming up my left leg and onto my left side.

Took me about 2.5 seconds to strip to my underwear and run inside to the shower.

Got away with only 4 or 5 bites, but none in the nethers like your bikini bottom friend!
 
vwnut said:
Ha!! Mine actually came pretty close!

I was moving my riding mower from the garage to the backyard and must have scalped a mound with the mower. Caught some movement out of the corner of my eye, and saw hundreds of them swarming up my left leg and onto my left side.

Took me about 2.5 seconds to strip to my underwear and run inside to the shower.

Got away with only 4 or 5 bites, but none in the nethers like your bikini bottom friend!
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Haha. Sucks to be you. So question, does it make me a bad person if I would still be laughing when you got out of the shower? What about if I managed to get my phone out and a video of the scene with me laughing hysterically, of course. Then texted you the video? This is why I can only maintain friendships with certain kinds of people. But I would expect nothing less from my friends too.
 
Justadesperatewifeandmom said:
so at work, bored, about to go on a noon conference calls (which was only scheduled last night, i have no idea what it is about so I don't know if i need to pay attention) usually little notice but some notice calls tend to be about why we suck (projects get more notice, emergency problems get no notice)

I have no fun ideas at the moment, so will just default to same old same old

http://i.imgur.com/dnPdj5Tm.jpg

hopefully my meeting give me ideas lol
Click to expand...

Gorgeous!
 
Justadesperatewifeandmom said:
Haha. Sucks to be you. So question, does it make me a bad person if I would still be laughing when you got out of the shower? What about if I managed to get my phone out and a video of the scene with me laughing hysterically, of course. Then texted you the video? This is why I can only maintain friendships with certain kinds of people. But I would expect nothing less from my friends too.
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Depends on the timing- during the actual time the ants in the pants crisis was taking place I may have gotten a bit upset, but as soon as the actual threat is eliminated, it's fair game.

If you can't find the comedy in tragedy you aren't looking hard enough.
 
Justadesperatewifeandmom said:
so today is one of those days where everything that can go wrong does. I am actually on location as shit blew up.

However, figured I would share a picture of the possible acv that occurs as I crawl around under things. I think i have avoided an acv though. Here is me, hard at work.

http://i.imgur.com/LSbRBZjm.jpg
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I would get into way too much trouble if you were crawling around my office like that, and yet somehow I’d be ok with that. :devil:
 
Justadesperatewifeandmom said:
I don't know. do you keep a candy dish on your desk? I already reached and leaned over all the desks whose owners keep a candy bowl to steal a few pieces (like I do everyday). well, if they keep chocolate in their candy dish, not those that keep like laffy taffy or something. I am a candy snob.
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My candy dish has snickers, KitKats, krackle, mr goodbars and milky ways in it, feel free to grab some and take your time leaning over sitting through the candy bowl
 
vwnut said:
Depends on the timing- during the actual time the ants in the pants crisis was taking place I may have gotten a bit upset, but as soon as the actual threat is eliminated, it's fair game.

If you can't find the comedy in tragedy you aren't looking hard enough.
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Yeah there is comedy in everything, pretty much my whole life for example

Isevil1976 said:
I would get into way too much trouble if you were crawling around my office like that, and yet somehow I’d be ok with that. :devil:
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Current trouble is what will be the future fun stories

Isevil1976 said:
My candy dish has snickers, KitKats, krackle, mr goodbars and milky ways in it, feel free to grab some and take your time leaning over sitting through the candy bowl
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I shall take some kitkats please, might have to lean over for a while to dig for them.
 
So, do I get points for surfing lit and posting a quick nip pic while at a 5 year olds birthday party. Yeah my day. First you know it is going to be an awesome day when you have to take your kid to a birthday party. Next even better is when you arrive you get asked if you are Brittany's mom. Brittany is a mother of another child. In their defense it is a redneck birthday party full of 4 and 5 year olds, so that means the moms at the party are 20 to 23 mostly, so their moms are younger than me or my age. So completely valid mistake I guess. Anyway, hanging out with kids and moms in a field in 85 degree weather isn't so bad. Why don't they serve alcohol at kids birthday parties? It would really help.

Anyway sneaky nip pic is the best I can do.
http://i.imgur.com/eFgljF4m.jpg
 
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