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Confessions: What are yours? (part 3)

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Interested_Girl said:
ICT I find compliments and a certain amount of attention very awkward, which in turn makes me either turn the compliment around. Make it into a joke or tear myself down.

IACT I think I may have an issue with disassocation at times.
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ICT compliments can be awkward. If one takes everything everyone says at face value, then it feels immodest, like "hell yeah I'm all that". But at the same time one would rather get them than not get them, I imagine.

And especially if one does not necessarily agree with teh compliment, it's hard to just let it go at that. But hey, what if that person's compliment is more right than your opinion about yourself? Who's to say it's not -- at the very least it is for that person.

I've been in the same place, and sometimes it's kind of nice to step back and say 'hrm this person thinks more of me than I do, maybe there's a reason?'
 
ICT that this is what I sent her

"Cool. I'm sorry about the last week or so. I do miss you, but it seems like I've done enough pushing away that idk. I guess maybe I need to try not being attached to people. Figure shit out for me and not drag other people in to the mess that is my life.

I'll miss you and your gorgeous smile. And the occasional photo of (edited to baby boy). I'll miss hearing about how you're doing and how the pregnancy is coming along. I'm just added stress in your life, and you don't need that. And I realize that now.

You are the most beautiful woman I know. I was extremely lucky to call you mine for a short time.

I've added heartbreak and pain to your life, in exchange for a few moments of great sexual pleasure and release. Not exactly a fair pay out for the downs. So I'm sorry, and you can always say hi, and I'll reply, I promise. But I'm not here to cause anyone pain or grief. So be well. I wish you the best of luck. I miss you already."

Never meant to cause her pain. It's that I can't have her now, don't know if I'll ever get to see her again, and my life got turned upside down in the last week. I need to focus on making sure I'm ready in case it takes the half barrel roll straight in to a nose dive and I don't have a roof over my head or a place to bring my kids when it's my time to see them. Lit became a distraction, and I'm both thankful and a little surprised she didn't call me out by name.

If I could, I would fill all the dreams we talked about. The memory of her smile that day still brings a stupid grin too my face.

I'm not dumping her like a piece of garbage. I was doing the one thing I've always done with her. 100% honesty. If I could I'd drive down watch the little guy so you could go to an adult dinner dressed to stun the world like you wanted to, and I'd pay for it if it'd make up for it.

I still care and hope you get the girl you're hoping for. I remember how you lit up talking about it. She'll be the most spoiled little princess ever. And have a handsome older brother to chase the other boys away.

I'm rambling, and I tried to stay away, but I couldn't let that go. Maybe I need to be more selective with my words, but I care deeply, I wish you were closer so we could have known if it'd have worked for real. And i will forever be sorry I hurt you. I know it doesn't make it better, but it's true.
 
ICT- anyone who has allowed themselves to feel anything has probably gotten hurt on here before. We as women just probably talk about it more. I know that in my own recent heartbreak, I wish that there would have been more honesty and less games. I'd love to say that it will keep me from opening my heart again, but then that wouldn't be me. The truth is, we all come here for a reason and many of us to fill an empty void. So for those of us who do, we'll open ourselves up to more chances of being hurt and hopefully we will do as others have pointed out and remember that there is a person behind the screen names, with real hearts.

IACT- for those of you who are hurting right now. Please remember that friends are what can get you through. They are the ones to remind us that we are better then whatever hurt us. They also remind us not to walk back into that which hurt us. :kiss:
 
ICT being one of those Lit Women who let her feelings get in the way. I tend to wear my heart on my sleeve and more often than not it gets me hurt. I'm a caring, honest, and I guess naive person and people tend to take advantage of that. I need to toughen up and just take all comments with a grain of salt. I am a real person with real feelings but people don't give a shit about that. They send messages when they are bored or have nothing better to do or are horny. Yeah I made that mistake and brought it on myself. I won't make that mistake again. If you don't actually want to have a conversation with me and you don't care about what I have to day just leave me alone. I know you think of me as two tits a hole and a heartbeat (that being optional) but I'm so much more than that. If you actually took the time to find that out you might be surprised at what you discover.

Thank you LadyJS. You're awesome.
 
ICT on two separate, completely unrelated occasions yesterday, two amazing women here told me something (non-sexual) that hit me like a pipe to the face...they were stunning and positive revelations.

IACT both gave me reason to pause and think about my current status...*****, Lit, love and everything else.

IFCT I'm sure that neither of them even realized it at the time, and would probably not take credit if I asked them about it directly....
 
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SassySheDevil said:
ICT- I really need my emotions to calm the fuck down. Between watching my little man get sworn into the Marines yesterday, and the wound getting ripped back open, I just want to sleep for days.:(
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Sassy, your son has taken on a Duty that we all need .. Be Proud .. It's a hard thing I know at the moment .. But Men like him are Needed !
 
ICT I feel for those who feel like they've been hurt, or been used.

ICT I've probably been on both ends of that over the years in this place.

But honestly, learning not to give a f*** has been useful in a variety of life situations, so I suppose Lit has helped me grow as a person? Lol. I've more or less just stopped having expectations from any other living being. Makes the world a much less frustrating place.

ICT if that sounds cynical, it really isn't. I try to take the world as it comes, one day at a time, one problem at a time. We're all just guests in each other's lives, coming and going with the ebb and flow of time. So I try to clean up after myself, and leave a place better than I found it as we all move on.

That said, I also don't do anywhere near as much socializing on this, or any other, board as I used to. Guess I'm just not the most social type anymore.
 
ICT:

My mother-in-law died recently. She was condescending to me and rude since the day I met her. They didn't want my wife to marry me, but we've been married 20 years. I don't miss my mother-in-law and I don't feel bad about her going. I just feel bad for my wife.
 
ICT now that Sir posts on behalf of me on Fet I feel less and less inclined to post on Lit.

IACT I enjoy asking for permission to post photos of myself or seeing which ones he posts hehe
 
Cute3Kitty said:
ICT now that Sir posts on behalf of me on Fet I feel less and less inclined to post on Lit.

IACT I enjoy asking for permission to post photos of myself or seeing which ones he posts hehe
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Best regards and best of everything to you Ms. Kitty.
 
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