New Year Cum-Sponge

[RobynBanks]

Here's the first few thousand words to my latest story. Is it worth continuing?

I'd like to know.

Luv ... Robyn.

I had the late shift at the bar, a busy night being as it was New Year’s Eve. I’d seen them earlier in the evening, a group of men enjoying time away from their wives and girlfriends. The first of them at the bar to buy a round was Andy, who looked to be the oldest, a barrel-chested man with a cannonball head and well-muscled arms covered with tattoos. He was cheeky and charming and very flirty, letting me know with his eyes and his smarm that he’d love to get my tits out of the clinging sweater I had on. He was one of those dangerous looking buggers who smiled a lot but always exuded an air of quiet menace, one of those men who, if I’m being honest, make my pussy clench. I fancied Andy as soon as I laid eyes on him, not that I’d given him any indication, but somehow he seemed to know exactly the effect he had on me.

Nevertheless I was working and it was busy, expected on that night of the year of course, so there wasn’t much banter back-and-forth between us. The others came up in their turn, ages ranging from what seemed to be mid-twenties to Andy who I put at somewhere ten years older than me – around fifty or so. I thought they were a decent group: loud and boisterous, yes, but not lairy at all. I didn’t get the sense those boys were going to kick-off, they were just out for beer and a laugh, women too if they could get any, not that there was much chance of any spare, not in that pub. Where I was working that night was a place purpose-built to serve the needs of the guests accommodated in log cabins by a fishing lake. We had a special ticket only event laid on, with people from the nearby town coming in for free drinks and a firework show at midnight.

[Please do not full stories to the forums. Thank you! - admin]


https://www.literotica.com/members/submissions_view.php

 

[geronimo_appleby]

gimme a few seconds to read the back catalogue.

 

[KingOfTheNerds]

Well you've got me hard and excited to read more.

 

[RobynBanks]

Oh, I've seen a couple of typos. Sorry, guys.

 

[EmilyJane]

Oh yes please.

 

[RickTango]

Here's the first few thousand words to my latest story. Is it worth continuing?

I'd like to know.

Luv ... Robyn.

I had the late shift at the bar, a busy night being as it was New Year’s Eve. I’d seen them earlier in the evening, a group of men enjoying time away from their wives and girlfriends. The first of them at the bar to buy a round was Andy, who looked to be the oldest, a barrel-chested man with a cannonball head and well-muscled arms covered with tattoos. He was cheeky and charming and very flirty, letting me know with his eyes and his smarm that he’d love to get my tits out of the clinging sweater I had on. He was one of those dangerous looking buggers who smiled a lot but always exuded an air of quiet menace, one of those men who, if I’m being honest, make my pussy clench. I fancied Andy as soon as I laid eyes on him, not that I’d given him any indication, but somehow he seemed to know exactly the effect he had on me.

Nevertheless I was working and it was busy, expected on that night of the year of course, so there wasn’t much banter back-and-forth between us. The others came up in their turn, ages ranging from what seemed to be mid-twenties to Andy who I put at somewhere ten years older than me – around fifty or so. I thought they were a decent group: loud and boisterous, yes, but not lairy at all. I didn’t get the sense those boys were going to kick-off, they were just out for beer and a laugh, women too if they could get any, not that there was much chance of any spare, not in that pub. Where I was working that night was a place purpose-built to serve the needs of the guests accommodated in log cabins by a fishing lake. We had a special ticket only event laid on, with people from the nearby town coming in for free drinks and a firework show at midnight.

[Please do not full stories to the forums. Thank you! - admin]


https://www.literotica.com/members/submissions_view.php



This had me mesmerized. Yes continue

 

[robertreams]

Well, I wasn't exactly mesmerized, and I see a lot of room for improvement, but you definitely made me want to read on, Keep going!

 

[PennLady]

Good luck with your story, but this isn't the place to post it. This is for stories already posted to Lit's story side. If you want a little help or feedback, that's fine, but the guideline is to post 3-4 paragraphs, not a few thousand words. If you want help editing before you post, you can check out the Editor's Forum and see who is available.

 

[rjordan]

When I see a title like "New Year Cum-Sponge" or something similar come up on the list of new stories, I usually pass. Granted the protagonist gives every indication that it is an accurate description. But while the story itself might approach the subject in a relatively unique way requiring some thought on your part, the title sounds like something a 12 year old boy would come up with. Tell me that's just a working title.

The story is interesting to this point. Finish it. Then put some effort into a more interesting title and write a blurb that makes me want to read it. Sometimes that's the only way you will reach some readers.

rj

 

[sr71plt]

Unfortunately, that is just the sort of title that attracts a big readership at Lit.

 

[xhellblazerx]

Unfortunately, that is just the sort of title that attracts a big readership at Lit.

Painful isn't it?

Everyone has their reading proclivities and if one handed reading is a person's idea of a good story have at it.

But how I feel is a stroke story can have some good hot sex, but that's all. Author's here who make an effort to give substance with their stroke reward me with not only hot sex, but to me a good story and getting to know "Jim and Jane" makes their coupling even hotter.

I know this sounds like a generalization-and I suppose it is, but titles like that and those stories make me think of beavis and butthead.

 

[sr71plt]

Right. But I have to say that (since I post stories often and do so with a lot of variety) I see a great divide in what the forum posters say they want to see in stories and what the general readership at Literotica makes obvious that they want to see in stories. It's the strokers and such topics as crude incest that sell big here--and most readers don't really care if it's literate (and certainly not literary) or not. That's just my observation--constantly being proved out--from posting a lot of stories here.

So, when forum posters post what they like to see--usually in terms of what writers should be writing--I want to scream. Because it's not what the general readership at Lit. has demonstrated that it wasn't to read. (And this doesn't mean I advocate writing to please the audience--because I don't. It means I think most forum posters are off base in claiming what the general readership here wants to read.)

I think you can get a handle on what the general readership wants to read by reading in on the "looking for this story" board. They generally are looking for stories that turn my stomach and, I think, insult my intelligence. But it's those stories they are looking for.

 

[xhellblazerx]

As a reader and some one who follows the lists seeing who the number one author on this site is tells me the majority here likes titles and stories like what the person posted here. Look at her page and some of the titles. Being female I feel adds to the fav total amongst the stroke crowd.

As for your incest remarks they are my guilty indulgence and I can tell you that the authors who consistently hit the high marks do not write crude stories of just lusty family members fucking for no reason, but write longer and often emotionally driven stories that take the time to examine the taboo, not rush right into it.

I have you on my favs list. I like a lot of your work. I have noted you have released a lot of incest stories in the last month and they crude and miss the mark of what a lot of the readers there want. It seems you think just because its family and they are having sex you are writing an incest story.

The writers who dominate that category do so with stories that explore conflict and emotional aspects not just hey mommy let's fuck.

I only point this out because seeing you are going to assume people are less intelligent than you and call any story that succeeds there crude then perhaps you should hear that from a reader.

I do enjoy your efforts just not in that genre.

 

[sr71plt]

As a reader and some one who follows the lists seeing who the number one author on this site is tells me the majority here likes titles and stories like what the person posted here. Look at her page and some of the titles. Being female I feel adds to the fav total amongst the stroke crowd.

As for your incest remarks they are my guilty indulgence and I can tell you that the authors who consistently hit the high marks do not write crude stories of just lusty family members fucking for no reason, but write longer and often emotionally driven stories that take the time to examine the taboo, not rush right into it.

I have you on my favs list. I like a lot of your work. I have noted you have released a lot of incest stories in the last month and they crude and miss the mark of what a lot of the readers there want. It seems you think just because its family and they are having sex you are writing an incest story.

The writers who dominate that category do so with stories that explore conflict and emotional aspects not just hey mommy let's fuck.

I only point this out because seeing you are going to assume people are less intelligent than you and call any story that succeeds there crude then perhaps you should hear that from a reader.

I do enjoy your efforts just not in that genre.

I don't read in the incest genre, so I don't know (or care, really) what the "general" reader wants there (beyond reading what they are looking for in the "looking for a story" section). I find most thoughts of incest crude. And what I have looked at tries to play the underage card as well--which I find beyond crude. I posted ten incest stories in the past month for a couple of reasons. One was to experiment with plotlines--and a wide variety of them--that could logically include incest between adults. It was a writing exercise. The other reason was to shut LC up about my not writing in the incest category. I wrote more in that category in 2014 than he did. So that's one jab with no teeth.

I don't really respect readers of incest, so your dislike of the stories I've written to the category doesn't rank high in my estimation. I do like to stretch my writing, so there are a lot of categories I'll write to--without regard of what the masses like to read in that category--as a writing exercise. That said, I got a whole shitload of votes/favorite stories/favorite author stats off the recent incest collection, so there are readers here who liked what I wrote even if you don't. And that's what I keep pointing to here (including railing at forum posters who tell authors what to write)--it's such a wide-ranging site that you're likely to find an interested audience in whatever you write (and the others can go hang).

 

[RobynBanks]

Good luck with your story, but this isn't the place to post it. This is for stories already posted to Lit's story side. If you want a little help or feedback, that's fine, but the guideline is to post 3-4 paragraphs, not a few thousand words. If you want help editing before you post, you can check out the Editor's Forum and see who is available.

Odd, I'm sure I put this in the Fetish section of Literotica. Perhaps it was moved?

 

[RobynBanks]

[Please do not full stories to the forums. Thank you! - admin]

 

[sr71plt]

See post #8.

 

[GoldenCojones]

Yes please finish the story

And submit it. It's hard to read in a forum like this. I recommend that you get a good editor. They can be very helpful. It's a good story.

If you want a critique of the story, feel free to PM me.

 

[robertreams]

Sr7, I admire your writing and agree with your analysis of most incest stories on Lit. Also with your opinion of readers in general. I have had readers tell me that anyone's opinion on good writing is as good as anyone else's. Not so. Even though badly written stories can sometimes garner wide readership, there is a difference. Stories in which i know and love (or hate) the characters, draw me in and excite me more, in any genre. keep up the good work!

 

[PennLady]

Odd, I'm sure I put this in the Fetish section of Literotica. Perhaps it was moved?

You may have tried to put it in the Fetish forum/board, but somehow it ended up here, in story feedback, where it doesn't really belong.

The second long excerpt you posted also doesn't belong here.

 

[xhellblazerx]

Sr7, I admire your writing and agree with your analysis of most incest stories on Lit. Also with your opinion of readers in general. I have had readers tell me that anyone's opinion on good writing is as good as anyone else's. Not so. Even though badly written stories can sometimes garner wide readership, there is a difference. Stories in which i know and love (or hate) the characters, draw me in and excite me more, in any genre. keep up the good work!

So the gist of your post is the reader never knows what they are talking about and no one here knows quality writing and every story that has a high score is due to reader ignorance.

Unless its your score.

That is what you, Robert and SR are saying. Readers know nothing unless they are worshiping your work.

When you get a five vote and an attaboy the reader must having discerning taste. When they do not fawn over you they are idiots.

Also Robert, I see no incest stories on your page so I am curious as to where you get your information on what the people who read in that category want.

But I what I do see on these boards is that you parrot anything SR71 says.

In my time here-and I was anon for years- I have read hundreds of incest stories in all parings so to speak, many good, many bad, some so-so.

I am the reader that people are trying to reach, or one would think, and if I said way to go I would know my stuff, when I say not so good I am a fool.

SR71's incest stories are below par and every number on them tells that tale. The scores in the low 4's(below the median score for incest which is about 4.3) can be the product of some unfriendly trolls.

But nasty readers cannot affect number of votes or how many comments a story garners or how many favorites pages it is put on.

The numbers on your stories SR71 are lacking in all facets Does that mean you should change your style? Of course not write as you will, everyone should.

But calling out the readership of an entire category as being stupid because they do not like your work is not only unprofessional, but it shows you do care because if you did not you would not stamp your feet and pout like a petulant child.

You do so in your comments anyone not enamored with you receives rudeness from you. People who are satisfied with their work let negative remarks roll off them they do not rant and insult.

You look especially poor here because as you insult the readership of incest you can't seem to post stories there fast enough of late. Perhaps your contempt for the category is the reason for your lackadaisical efforts.

Once more....like a lot of your stuff, but the downside of these forums is one gets to 'meet' the authors and see what they are like. Seeing I am apparently of lesser intelligence than you, I will spend my time reading authors more to 'my level'

The ones who run the top lists in the category because they, unlike you, know what the readers like or are willing to try to learn.

 

[sr71plt]

So the gist of your post is the reader never knows what they are talking about and no one here knows quality writing and every story that has a high score is due to reader ignorance.

Unless its your score.

That is what you, Robert and SR are saying. Readers know nothing unless they are worshiping your work.

When you get a five vote and an attaboy the reader must having discerning taste. When they do not fawn over you they are idiots.

No, that isn't anything I have posted and I see no reason to discuss this on the basis of your exaggerated and nasty premises.

 

[RobynBanks]

See post #8.

See post #15.

 

[RobynBanks]

You may have tried to put it in the Fetish forum/board, but somehow it ended up here, in story feedback, where it doesn't really belong.

The second long excerpt you posted also doesn't belong here.

Hmm, yes, thank you for your comment, which doesn't really help.

 

[RobynBanks]

Here is the list of submissions. Feedback is welcome.

http://www.literotica.com/stories/memberpage.php?uid=2048702&page=submissions