Your point of no return in being GLBT?

[woman_inside]

I don't mean necessarily when you first felt attracted to the same sex or identified with the opposite sex, or when u lost your virginity, etc. I mean the point of "no return" in that you couldn't stay in denial any more, or couldn't continue in the same lifestyle any more, or a turning point in a similar sense - after all, the societal default is straight cisgender.

For me, there've been a couple I guess: one time as a teenager a man, a complete stranger, fondled me in a public place. Now, I'd lusted after men before (beginning when I was twelve), I'd stuck things up my ass before but, because I also liked girls and so forth I was in denial, dismissing it as a passing phase or as meaningless. But being fondled like that turned me on so much, more than my gf ever had (ironically, I was on my way to see her), and I thought "OMG! I'm a submissive gay bottom!" I wanted not just cock in my mouth and ass, but this complete stranger's cock. I later decided "I'm bi and with a man I want to be bottom," and didn't do anything about it for a while, but I couldn't truly deny it any more.

Another was, not quite when I lost my anal virginity, but just seconds before, when I put my ankles on his shoulders. Now, I'd agreed to have sex with him, I'd roleplayed his maid, shaved my legs, had my chest fondled while he told me he loved my big breasts, but up until that point I still had the option of stopping, of not losing my anal virginity. But when I put my ankles on his shoulders, in was kind of sealing my fate not just in having sex with men, but in doing so in a feminine role - that earlier time I was fondled, I had thought I was a gay bottom, not that I had a feminine side. Incidentally, I think, apart from panic, that was one of the reasons when I was fondled I

Another time, I'm not sure it was a point of no return as there were no obvious immediate consequences (but probably influenced many of my fantasies), but one time as a teen I nearly got beat up by a bunch of black teens riding their bikes - I just walked away and nothing more happened, but I almost immediately fantasized with being dragged behind the bushes by them and one of them, who was wearing white shorts, getting me to kneel in front of him and give him a blowjob.

 

[klippert]

When I 'Said' to myself....I'm going for it if the right person is there. After my first marriage went south..... A couple of weeks after the judges gavel fell. I told myself. This desire that I have....I'm going for it. Since I played round with a neighbor friend, when we were younger....hiking and camping out in the back 40. I felt that excitement.

 

[Hitchiker69]

For me it was the first time I walked into a gay bar. By doing that I was publicly saying 'I want some cock tonight, and I don't care who knows that'
Up until then my gay experiences had been private, and I'd always been propositioned by men. By walking through that door was identifying myself as a bisexual man.

 

[titerear71106]

It was the first time I held a real cock in my hand while l was kissing him

 

[CJontherocks]

After I submitted my retirement papers, I treated myself to a little weekend trip to the Castro. I stayed at a B&B, walked the streets, talked to people, visited a theater and experienced the nightlife. That's when I knew for sure. San Francisco has always been my most favoritist city in the whole wide world, and I would definitely live happily in the Castro. Like Hitchhiker, I walked into a bar with the full intent of getting laid. I met a guy who really flipped my trigger, but struck out (I like to think it was because he had to take care of his drunken friend).

Sadly, I didn't get any at all. Well, there was the men's club I went to, but that was just to satisfy the urgent need. I did get to make out with a guy for the first time. No going back after that! (As if I would ever want to.)

 

[Bufmuck]

First boyfriend, and bringing him to my family. Prior to that I think there'd always been the thought that maybe it was just short term set of feelings, or maybe just a phase. But after that there wasn't any going back.

 

[Eastborn]

When I 'Said' to myself....I'm going for it if the right person is there. After my first marriage went south..... A couple of weeks after the judges gavel fell. I told myself. This desire that I have....I'm going for it. Since I played round with a neighbor friend, when we were younger....hiking and camping out in the back 40. I felt that excitement.

Same experence here. I met someone, it seemed right. We went out, kissed, it seemed right. I just went for it.

 

[rbone04]

For me it was when I realized that self-denial, in general, is a relatively BS concept; and when it comes to sexuality, it is an ABSOLUTELY BS concept.

To suggest there is a "point of no return" in being GLBT is to suggest that it's possible to go back in time and not be turned on that very first time by a member of the same sex. Sexual arousal is far to powerful a force to pretend like it isn't happening.

I understand what you're trying to say here though... And while I can't even begin to remember the exact time, place, and/or situation; I do remember a point in my life (around puberty I'd say) where I knew I was constantly trying to decide how I was supposed to deal with my feelings. The only thing I knew for certain was that at some point my internal feelings would have to become more than something only I knew about.