Written something, now need feedback

[LaRascasse]

Here's something which I eked out over the holidays. What do you think of it?

Note - even though it's part of a longer, overarching story, it should be good as a standalone read as well.

www.literotica.com/s/moira-1

I'm open to all kinds of critique, good or bad.

 

[swingerjoe]

Very impressive writing. You have great talent. The plot moved at a steady pace, and the characters were fully formed. It was easy to get lost in this story. Please keep up the good work.