Writing Paragraphs and run on sentences.

[bobhardcastle]

I'm really having a hard time reading some of the material on here. The 'authors' write run on sentences without a lot of punctuation, and those run on sentences go on to become run on paragraphs. Like the Characters (or the Narrator) doesn't slow down to catch their breath.

I don't get past the first few of these run on paragraphs before I give up. Even if the ideas in the story seem like they might be worth reading. (And too many of them don't. I don't do non-stop what I call "fuckfests," where there is not story except for the sex.

 

[StillStunned]

We're all just amateurs here, writing what we want, and how we want to. There are plenty of readers who enjoy long, convoluted sentences and paragraphs, just as there are readers who (like you) prefer their prose in more manageable bits. I'm in the latter category, by the way, in case you interpret that as an attack.

Particularly for online reading, I think readers shouldn't have to be concentrating so hard on the writing that they lose track of the story.

On the subject of sex-only stories, well, I think there's room for both here. I write both, in fact, and I think each has its own merits. It can be just as difficult to write an engaging one-scene sex story as it is to plot out a narrative.

 

[AlinaX]

... got halfway through and realised I'd run out of slots for my tabs, so of course I was straight onto Amazon and thank God for Prime because you can only stuff tabs into the same old slots for so long before your fingers are cramping up - theirs too, lol - but it was still a shock to see I'd ordered metric instead of imperial and you know what they say about inches...

 

[KeithD]

First, paragraphing for commercial fiction isn't the same as it was for high school essays. In addition, paragraphs in stories posted to the Internet beg for shorter paragraphs for reading ease. The upshot is that paragraphs for fiction, especially that offered on the Internet, don't have to follow any sort of topic sentence or bell curve guidance and they would best shorter than longer--with the paragraph lengths being varied overall.

Second, run-on sentences in commercial fiction are fine if they serve a purpose (e.g., quickening the flow) and they don't become intrusive. Becoming intrusive is subjective, so it would take a pile-up of intruded readers to make it too much.

 

[SimonDoom]

I'm very much of the "keep your sentences and paragraphs manageable" school. I don't mind if authors push the boundaries if they do so for a purpose and they know what they are doing, but too often it is, as far as I can tell, just a matter of laziness and habit. Particularly with respect to online stories, which many are reading on their phones, it makes sense to be kind to your readers by not overindulging in run on sentences and overlong paragraphs.

It's the very rare case where your erotic story readers better when it comes across as a William Faulkner imitation.

 

[Mastered_again]

I hear you, Simon.
I have a propensity for long sentences, but do make a concerted effort to punctuate them properly.
When editing/proofing, I'm always asking myself if there's a more concise way to construct things. Fewer words while still conveying the intended meaning.
Run on sentences and paragraphs make my teeth itch.

 

[Not2Pervy]

Shortening up my paragraphs is the biggest conscious adjustment I have made to my writing here since I started two years ago, for the exact reasons stated above.

 

[pink_silk_glove]

I'm really having a hard time reading some of the material on here. The 'authors' write run on sentences without a lot of punctuation, and those run on sentences go on to become run on paragraphs. Like the Characters (or the Narrator) doesn't slow down to catch their breath.

I don't get past the first few of these run on paragraphs before I give up. Even if the ideas in the story seem like they might be worth reading. (And too many of them don't. I don't do non-stop what I call "fuckfests," where there is not story except for the sex.

It's a free site that welcomes all (and that's a good thing) which includes rank amateurs and noobs - tons of 'em, the majority actually. That just means that for those of us who require certain minimal levels of literacy, let alone prose, it's just a little or a lot harder to find something that pleases us. You certainly can't say that you're not getting your money's worth, so suck it up and deal with it. You're a big boy. You can do it.

 

[MillieDynamite]

I'm guilty of ignoring all kinds of rules, even some grammatical variety. If it reads well, why change it? That's not to say that I don't try and fix what I can. But not in dialog. People's speech should be perfectly imperfect. In writing Russian dialog, use no a, an, the, or to in the speech. It's how they talk because they don't have those articles in their language.

 

[Cagivagurl]

I'm really having a hard time reading some of the material on here. The 'authors' write run on sentences without a lot of punctuation, and those run on sentences go on to become run on paragraphs. Like the Characters (or the Narrator) doesn't slow down to catch their breath.

I don't get past the first few of these run on paragraphs before I give up. Even if the ideas in the story seem like they might be worth reading. (And too many of them don't. I don't do non-stop what I call "fuckfests," where there is not story except for the sex.

I am very guilty of this heinous crime.
I am not good at grammar or punctuation. IRL, I am described as a chatterbox...
My writing probably reflects that.
I do try to write like the people around me speak. Give the dialogue a semblance of reality.
Most people don't speak as if they were addressing an audience.
Conversation these days is constantly changing, slang has become more pronounced and accepted.

While writing, I try to include some of those too make it seem more real. Run on sentences... Yep, part of day to day life...

When I read, especially here on a free site, where a large majority of the stories are written by people like myself. Amateur hacks who simply enjoy the process.
If your limits are so tight, I fear you are missing some really good stories. (Not mine BTW)...
Still, we are all different.

Cagivagurl

 

[Zandrite]

You say "fuckfests"... sometimes I say "vignettes."

tomato - tomahto?

I'm not implying that the former term can't be applied. To a lot of stories. A fuck-ton, if you will.
And yet, I find that I enjoy writing small, bite-sized pieces of erotica for people to enjoy.
I think that it's entirely possible to write a lovely "fuckfest" that has more to offer than might appear at first glance.
Sometimes the sex is the story, but that story can still be sweet or silly or charming or many things along the way.

Giving vignettes some props. Not just because I write them, though I certainly do.

 

[KeithD]

I'm really having a hard time reading some of the material on here.

Then don't. Chances are good there are stories that appeal to you and are written to your standards. Once you've found one, you probably have an author to follow satisfactory. You can leave the stories that don't meet your standards to those who appreciate them.

 

[bobhardcastle]

Then don't. Chances are good there are stories that appeal to you and are written to your standards. Once you've found one, you probably have an author to follow satisfactory. You can leave the stories that don't meet your standards to those who appreciate them.

As I do. I only favorite Authors on here who have good stories along with the sex, and few grammatical errors.

 

[bobhardcastle]

You say "fuckfests"... sometimes I say "vignettes."

tomato - tomahto?

I'm not implying that the former term can't be applied. To a lot of stories. A fuck-ton, if you will.
And yet, I find that I enjoy writing small, bite-sized pieces of erotica for people to enjoy.
I think that it's entirely possible to write a lovely "fuckfest" that has more to offer than might appear at first glance.
Sometimes the sex is the story, but that story can still be sweet or silly or charming or many things along the way.

Giving vignettes some props. Not just because I write them, though I certainly do.

I do write vignettes myself. But I prefer to write Stories that have meaningful content, other than just sex. and that is what I prefer in others.

 

[bobhardcastle]

I'm guilty of ignoring all kinds of rules, even some grammatical variety. If it reads well, why change it? That's not to say that I don't try and fix what I can. But not in dialog. People's speech should be perfectly imperfect. In writing Russian dialog, use no a, an, the, or to in the speech. It's how they talk because they don't have those articles in their language.

I"m referring to (relatively) good grammar and people knowing/editing for sentences that don't read like slow moving trains.

 

[bobhardcastle]

I'm very much of the "keep your sentences and paragraphs manageable" school. I don't mind if authors push the boundaries if they do so for a purpose and they know what they are doing, but too often it is, as far as I can tell, just a matter of laziness and habit. Particularly with respect to online stories, which many are reading on their phones, it makes sense to be kind to your readers by not overindulging in run on sentences and overlong paragraphs.

It's the very rare case where your erotic story readers better when it comes across as a William Faulkner imitation.

"if they do so for a purpose" instead of just 'can't edit.' I want people to read my stories on here, and not pass them by because they are unreadable. (Oh, and yes, I think of myself as a professional, so I do try for that reason as well.)

 

[KeithD]

As I do. I only favorite Authors on here who have good stories along with the sex, and few grammatical errors.

Then why did you say you were having trouble reading some of the material on here? And that you felt irritated enough to post to the discussion board about it? Contradictory. Just read the authors you like (as you say you do) and leave the other stories for others to enjoy, as they like. I don't understand why this had to come to the discussion board.

 

[bobhardcastle]

I'm very much of the "keep your sentences and paragraphs manageable" school. I don't mind if authors push the boundaries if they do so for a purpose and they know what they are doing, but too often it is, as far as I can tell, just a matter of laziness and habit. Particularly with respect to online stories, which many are reading on their phones, it makes sense to be kind to your readers by not overindulging in run on sentences and overlong paragraphs.

It's the very rare case where your erotic story readers better when it comes across as a William Faulkner imitation.

I"m just talking. About a sentence that makes sense. And not something that goes on for days because the person writing it just does not have a sense of where a sentence ends and dialogue I told him I don't think so, but she said No I disagree cause...

 

[orangecurious]

Write what you want, read what you want. If you don't like it, stop reading, if you think you can do better, write it.

 

[Bazzle]

I'm really having a hard time reading some of the material on here. The 'authors' write run on sentences without a lot of punctuation, and those run on sentences go on to become run on paragraphs. Like the Characters (or the Narrator) doesn't slow down to catch their breath.

I don't get past the first few of these run on paragraphs before I give up. Even if the ideas in the story seem like they might be worth reading. (And too many of them don't. I don't do non-stop what I call "fuckfests," where there is not story except for the sex.

Guilty.

Next case your honour.