Writing Challenge ~ 1st - 15th May 2011 ~ Reviews and Comments

[Britwitch]

WRITING CHALLENGE REVIEW THREAD ~ MAY 2011 ~ PART ONE​

Just a few little rules for this thread:-

• This thread is for comments and reviews only. Submissions go here!

• Please keep your comments focused on the pieces posted for the challenge running from 1st – 15th May 2011 only, this is not really intended to be a thread for conversation/flirting/mayhem and so on (Sorry to be a bore!). Writers should be able to find reviews/comments for their pieces without having to trawl through pages of banter (no matter how amusing/sexy it might be!)

• Readers/Reviewers:- Please keep your comments and reviews polite and, wherever possible, positive. If you have constructive criticism or advice for writers please do give it but be polite about it! You don’t have to like everything you read but if you really don’t have anything nice to say about something then I would suggest you refrain from posting. And if all you want to say is you liked a piece and no more…that’s great too! We all know how writers like to be appreciated!

• Authors:- Please take constructive criticism as it is intended, as an attempt at improving possible flaws/problems/areas of confusion in your piece. They are not (hopefully!) personal attacks on you or your work.

• This is supposed to be a fun way to get to know new writers and potential partners, to exercise our writing brains, it’s not a competition, please keep that in mind!

• One more thing…suggestions for future prompts are very welcome and should be PM’d to me – Britwitch – as a link ideally.

Previous challenges and reviews can be found here.

Happy reading!

 

[marauder13]

Darkness by Last_Rider

I am impressed by this piece. As I read it, I was trying to think of where it was going. The final paragraph was superb. It was nicely built up, giving me a good feel for the family that spawned the tales, as well as how those tales worked into the local knowledge. Plus the very inventive way the narrator used that knowledge.

All up, well done.

 

[Last_Rider]

Untitled - M13

I enjoyed this, the feel of tiredness and isolation. His knowing how to end it, not so much end his life as end the result of his choices. A good job with the emotion, and of course water as they metaphorical cleansing.

Untitled - Wideeyedone

Simple, evocative, everything a prose poem should be. Well done.

Echos - M13

Giving the house sentience was a neat bit, his loneliness was conveyed as well as the excitement of the family planning on moving into it. Definitely a good piece.

Untitled - DarkEmpress

The first thing that sprung to my mind when I saw this prompt was a vampire story, unfortunately I couldn't get it to crystallize and in the end I'm glad because I like this. Her heartbreak, the imagery of the river, what she had to do, all of it. Well done.

All Hallows - Cait

This is pregnant with atmosphere, her heart racing, trying to convince herself that it's all alright. The reveal of them, the seductive horror they offer. I loved this, thanks for submitting it.

 

[Britwitch]

I am sooooo behind with my reviews...not to mention my own writing but enough of that...I am on my way to work very very shortly so these are terribly brief but I will try to get proper reviews for all of the pieces up later!!

M13 - both of your pieces were superb as always. You always manage to capture the emotion of your setting perfectly.

wideeyedone - short but oh so brilliant!

 

[DarkWarrioress]

*Rider: ~Darkness~

Loved this. I enjoyed how you gave the house a story and how the truth can take on so many faces and that gossip stems from a truth, no matter how small, somewhere. I'm not a huge fan of horror, but this piece of yours held my attention. The ending was a bit of surprise for me simply because I think you might have used a photo taken from veroe's thread? That was a nice little add in. All in all it was creepy and thoroughly enjoyable. Thanks for sharing.

*M13: ~Untitled~

Excellent as always, M13. I wasn't sure at first where you were headed with Rodger. I was thinking he was some creepy psycho murderer. You have illustrated man's cycling emotions beautifully. The whole concept of be careful what you wish for.

*M13: ~Echoes~

M13, there are more times than naught I wish I could be a little brain ninja and roll around in that fertile imaginative mind of yours. This was a fresh perspective on the prop. At first, I was lost. I had no idea who "Ashton" was but you reveled it marvelously. Loved the piece and look forward to reading more of yours as the months progress.

*Dark Empress: ~Untitled~

You expressed their emotions very well, the conflict, love, anger, the surprise. I hadn't seen that ending coming. Well done. I hope to see more of your admissions.

*wideeyedone: ~untitled~

Such sorrow, captured so easily in few words. Thank you.

 

[Last_Rider]

Glad you liked it Cait, and yes I used that pic for the final image. I'm trying to give the general act a different mental trigger than either of the abysmal Hills Have Eyes movies.