In the past, my husband has worked on a project with a female movis star, who is now out of favor because she is in her early forties. He will again be with her for three days this coming weekend. He hinted that he thought that he could "Make her." I told him to "Go for it." Would you have?
Would you give your permission?
- Thread starter Softly
- Start date
Never
Come What May
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No..
It seems the only reason he's interested in her is because she was in the movies. Perhaps it's just me, but if a man says he could 'make her' it sounds like he doesn't think of her as a person as much as a sexual conquest.
To me the idea of screwing someone just because you can is.. distasteful.
It seems the only reason he's interested in her is because she was in the movies. Perhaps it's just me, but if a man says he could 'make her' it sounds like he doesn't think of her as a person as much as a sexual conquest.
To me the idea of screwing someone just because you can is.. distasteful.
Mustang Sally
Wanna go for a ride?
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I'm not married, so I couldn't answer your question with any degree of experience, but I think it's interesting. Do you have an "open" marriage? I mean, have you and/or your husband openly had sex with other partners in the past? Have you made an exception because the woman is or was famous?
teresafannin
One who hears the Music
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I would also say no, my fiancee & I have been together 4 years, engaged the last 2. My guy is my guy & I don't want him to be with anyone else.I am notorious for not being willing to share certain things. Of course, I also think that he wouldn't want to have sex with someone unless he had some feelings for her. Not to be rude, but it sounds like your husband doesn't really care for this woman, the fact that she is a movie star shouldn't be the only reason to have sex with her. I think it demeans them both. JMHO.
GuyJD
"Simply.....the best"
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A MALE'S POINT OF VIEW
The two of you should discuss that matter. I was in a similiar situation. After being in the work field for more than 2 decades, I have done something that I have never done before. I began dating a coworker (different department from mine). We dated for a few months and when we split up, I started seeing another coworker (also different department from mine) whom I had a crush on months prior. During the first week of our relationship, my current girlfriend asked that I not talk to my ex-girlfriend while the 3 of us are working. While my ex was pissed because of the fact that my current asked that of me, I respected her request because, as for as I was concerned, she was and still is who I want(ed) to be with.
Therefore, if you are uncomfortable with your husband's association with the former actress, he should respect that. If it is important to his job to be there for her, he should explain that to you. Keep the faith and trust in your marriage.
[Edited by GuyJD on 10-04-2000 at 11:24 PM]
The two of you should discuss that matter. I was in a similiar situation. After being in the work field for more than 2 decades, I have done something that I have never done before. I began dating a coworker (different department from mine). We dated for a few months and when we split up, I started seeing another coworker (also different department from mine) whom I had a crush on months prior. During the first week of our relationship, my current girlfriend asked that I not talk to my ex-girlfriend while the 3 of us are working. While my ex was pissed because of the fact that my current asked that of me, I respected her request because, as for as I was concerned, she was and still is who I want(ed) to be with.
Therefore, if you are uncomfortable with your husband's association with the former actress, he should respect that. If it is important to his job to be there for her, he should explain that to you. Keep the faith and trust in your marriage.
[Edited by GuyJD on 10-04-2000 at 11:24 PM]
We have an open marriage. If she was not who she is, I would not have mentioned it to you. My husband has been around many people like her, but most are "busy." What is different here is she is extremly wealthy, and has time on her hands. To make it in her world, you have to be extremly aggressive and smart. There once was a song called; "she is a Maneater."
If she was not who she is, I would not have mentioned it to you
Oh, so you didn't really give a fuck if anyone had opinions on this, you were just trying to impress everyone with your sort of "brush with greatness" here???
Ok, I'm impressed.
Well, maybe not.
Oh, so you didn't really give a fuck if anyone had opinions on this, you were just trying to impress everyone with your sort of "brush with greatness" here???
Ok, I'm impressed.
Well, maybe not.
Siren and Lasher, your point of view is understanable.Sorry that I posted this thread. He has been around persons like her; I have not, nor do I understand them. With so many on the board from the Ca. area, I thought that others had experiences to pass on.
forgetunome
Kisses Sweeter Than Wine!!
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To answer the question...
Never in a million years
!
My guy is my guy I share with no one...I know I'm selfish when it comes to some things! Mine mine mine...I don't care how famous the person is.
Never in a million years
!My guy is my guy I share with no one...I know I'm selfish when it comes to some things! Mine mine mine...I don't care how famous the person is.
Bonnie Wee Lassie
Sweet Beaver
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I think that all depends on if you trust him or not!
G
Guest
Guest
Hmm?
wolfy
Really Experienced
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I think forgetunome's bf is really lucky cause she rules
If my gf wanted to sleep with another guy bad enough to ask
me about it and was honest I would be ok with it. Personally
i'd rather my gf be happy even if it wasn't with me. Of course
thats easy to say when it's never happened hehe.
If my gf wanted to sleep with another guy bad enough to ask
me about it and was honest I would be ok with it. Personally
i'd rather my gf be happy even if it wasn't with me. Of course
thats easy to say when it's never happened hehe.
CreamyLady
Uncompromising Visionary
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Softly said:
The experience being the, er, star fuck?
To me the idea of sleeping with someone just because they are "who they are" is distasteful. Is there anything worse than just being a thing to someone?
Particularly if, as you suggested, there might be some vulnerability because of career difficulties and age.
I don't think very highly of your husband, Softly. Using people is just using people, and because they are famous doesn't make it better.
i agree with most of these freaks, now don't get me wrong, i think you had valid reason to ask us our opinions.
i will say i try not to say never, but in this case i have made an exception, because, i will NEVER again, EVER sleep with someone i don't have genuine affection for, trust in, and respect for.
if your husband wants to sleep with her for any reason other than wanting to share intimacy etc with her, he needs to reevaluate why he has sex with anyone, and you should then look at why you sleep with him.
is sex an expression of love and/or affection, devotion, friendship, etc, or is it to feel good, is it mentally satisfying for either of you, and there are more questions like that.
i think you should both very carefully evaluate your motives,...
these people are right. a star is a person, it's proven every day. you should not take that into consideration any more than whatever it is your husband does, or whatever you do. i promise, if she really wanted top quality and wanted to get it, she could.
i hope this made sense, and i hope you consider it,... you don't have to agree, but i hope you think about it a little bit.
i will say i try not to say never, but in this case i have made an exception, because, i will NEVER again, EVER sleep with someone i don't have genuine affection for, trust in, and respect for.
if your husband wants to sleep with her for any reason other than wanting to share intimacy etc with her, he needs to reevaluate why he has sex with anyone, and you should then look at why you sleep with him.
is sex an expression of love and/or affection, devotion, friendship, etc, or is it to feel good, is it mentally satisfying for either of you, and there are more questions like that.
i think you should both very carefully evaluate your motives,...
these people are right. a star is a person, it's proven every day. you should not take that into consideration any more than whatever it is your husband does, or whatever you do. i promise, if she really wanted top quality and wanted to get it, she could.
i hope this made sense, and i hope you consider it,... you don't have to agree, but i hope you think about it a little bit.
Latina
Literotica Guru
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- Sep 13, 2000
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I agree with the others:
1. No, I could not and would not let my husband have
another woman, famous or not. He had 40 years of
being single to do that, now he's mine and I'm his.
(BTW he never bedded another woman BEFORE he met me, so
if he wanted to NOW, I'd know we have serious problems).
I wonder, why are YOU are so willing to let him do this?
Do you think that makes you seem freer and more liberal?
Is it because she is famous?
2. Sex without love is nothing. It's the love EXPRESSED
in the sex act that makes sex truly great.
3. Doing her because she's a famous movie star demeans
both her and him. His saying he "thinks he can make
her" shows he has a VERY odd way of looking at love,
sex, and women. I could probably "make it" with a lot
of guys I don't care about, but I woldn't want to,
and why does HE want to? Just because he CAN?
4. Wanting to have sex outside of marriage hints that
something's wrong INSIDE the marriage.
5. "My husband's fucking a movie star but I won't
say which one" does not impress anybody, if that
was your intent (not sure it WAS your intent).
6. Your man's energies and love and lust should be 100%
focused on YOU. If they aren't, you need to take a good
hard look at your marriage. Counseling might be needed.
7. Sex with someone famous is no better or different
than with anyone else. And without the component of
love, it is probably WORSE than what he presumably
has with you.
Just my opinion, but you ASKED for opinions.
-- Latina
----------------------
Opinions are like assholes, everybody has one and they all stink.
1. No, I could not and would not let my husband have
another woman, famous or not. He had 40 years of
being single to do that, now he's mine and I'm his.
(BTW he never bedded another woman BEFORE he met me, so
if he wanted to NOW, I'd know we have serious problems).
I wonder, why are YOU are so willing to let him do this?
Do you think that makes you seem freer and more liberal?
Is it because she is famous?
2. Sex without love is nothing. It's the love EXPRESSED
in the sex act that makes sex truly great.
3. Doing her because she's a famous movie star demeans
both her and him. His saying he "thinks he can make
her" shows he has a VERY odd way of looking at love,
sex, and women. I could probably "make it" with a lot
of guys I don't care about, but I woldn't want to,
and why does HE want to? Just because he CAN?
4. Wanting to have sex outside of marriage hints that
something's wrong INSIDE the marriage.
5. "My husband's fucking a movie star but I won't
say which one" does not impress anybody, if that
was your intent (not sure it WAS your intent).
6. Your man's energies and love and lust should be 100%
focused on YOU. If they aren't, you need to take a good
hard look at your marriage. Counseling might be needed.
7. Sex with someone famous is no better or different
than with anyone else. And without the component of
love, it is probably WORSE than what he presumably
has with you.
Just my opinion, but you ASKED for opinions.
-- Latina
----------------------
Opinions are like assholes, everybody has one and they all stink.
Surprised
One of the attractions of Literotica is that the stories and persons who post on the BB are interesting and complex.
I find that I get the most approval mail in responce to stories of multi-partners, married or not. Yet this post brought a strong current of restriction to married persons, and disapproval of the mention of sex with a person of fame.
This does not square to me and is suprising.
Much of our married life, we have been apart two weeks a month. The reports about what kind of person we met, in or out of bed was of interest to us.
It seems none of you have thought about being in bed with someone you have admired from a distance. The lesson here is; "If it happens to you, don't tell anyone on the BB."
Instewad of the "General Board," we should call it the "Baptist Chat Room."
We live and learn.
One of the attractions of Literotica is that the stories and persons who post on the BB are interesting and complex.
I find that I get the most approval mail in responce to stories of multi-partners, married or not. Yet this post brought a strong current of restriction to married persons, and disapproval of the mention of sex with a person of fame.
This does not square to me and is suprising.
Much of our married life, we have been apart two weeks a month. The reports about what kind of person we met, in or out of bed was of interest to us.
It seems none of you have thought about being in bed with someone you have admired from a distance. The lesson here is; "If it happens to you, don't tell anyone on the BB."
Instewad of the "General Board," we should call it the "Baptist Chat Room."
We live and learn.
Surprised
One of the attractions of Literotica is that the stories and persons who post on the BB are interesting and complex.
I find that I get the most approval mail in responce to stories of multi-partners, married or not. Yet this post brought a strong current of restriction to married persons, and disapproval of the mention of sex with a person of fame.
This does not square to me and is suprising.
Much of our married life, we have been apart two weeks a month. The reports about what kind of person we met, in or out of bed was of interest to us.
It seems none of you have thought about being in bed with someone you have admired from a distance. The lesson here is; "If it happens to you, don't tell anyone on the BB."
Instead of the "General Board," we should call it the "Baptist Chat Room."
We live and learn.
One of the attractions of Literotica is that the stories and persons who post on the BB are interesting and complex.
I find that I get the most approval mail in responce to stories of multi-partners, married or not. Yet this post brought a strong current of restriction to married persons, and disapproval of the mention of sex with a person of fame.
This does not square to me and is suprising.
Much of our married life, we have been apart two weeks a month. The reports about what kind of person we met, in or out of bed was of interest to us.
It seems none of you have thought about being in bed with someone you have admired from a distance. The lesson here is; "If it happens to you, don't tell anyone on the BB."
Instead of the "General Board," we should call it the "Baptist Chat Room."
We live and learn.
teresafannin
One who hears the Music
- Joined
- Jul 27, 2000
- Posts
- 2,532
I think what I have a problem with is the way you phrased it. "I think I can make her" sounds like he doesn't care anything for her, he just wants to have sex with a famous person. The fact that she is not a top star anymore gives the impression that she is desperate for anyone's attention. It is demeaning to both of them. If you have an open marriage & it works for you, great. With all the diseases out there, I am strictly into monogamy. People will generally respond differently to fiction than real life, a look at the incest threads will tell you that. Lots of people read incest stories & threads, very few actually do it. If you don't like what people say, you might want to avoid asking for opinions on a public bulletin board.
Latina
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Sep 13, 2000
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Yes, Siren, I was including myself about stinkin' opinions (Opinions? We don't need no stinkin' opinions!). My mother-in-law's family is Jewish (although she and my Frank aren't), it is a Jewish custom to put yourself down and laugh at yourself before anyone else can, that must have rubbed off on me from her family over these past 4 years.
As to Softly and "Baptist Chat Room", most of us probably have nothing against sex outside of marriage PER SE, I had sex before I was married, between marriages, and with Frank before we married. But once you make that commitment to love and honor a marriage partner, you shouldn't betray that partner, EVEN if the partner says it is OK, else why get married in the first place or why not divorce? If you make a commitment to give 100% per cent to the person you love, and then say oh well it doesn't count if I stray with a famous person, where is the trust and honesty and commitment and loyalty and cherishing of your partner?
And his reasons for straying STINK! Because the person is famous. Because the opportunity is there. Because you said it was OK (if he really loves you, he shouldn't have had to even ASK, he should have not wanted to do it because he wants only you). I may not be a supermodel, but I guarantee if I paraded down the street nude and asked ten straight guys to fuck me at least nine would, and so what, what does that prove if it's just random sex with a thing that you don't even view as a person, and it betrays your commitment to the spouse you love? That sort of sex with an object is for vibrators, not real people with real feelings. But asking a man (or woman) to love you 100% and you loving them back 100%, and FINDING that person and sticking to that "in sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer", takes true character that so few people (except, of course, most Literoticans) have, and evidently your spouse lacks.
I am about the LEAST religious person you could ever meet, and religion has nothing to do with it; being a good person of good character who honors the commimtent to the one you love has NOTHING to do with religion, it has to do with strength of character! That is what has had so many so upset with Clinton for so long--not that he can't EVER keep it in his pants, but that he betrays Hilary with Monica, betrays Monica with Paula and lots of others, and lies to EVERYONE about it all--NO character! Some have chosen to MAKE that a religious issue, but if religion equaled character, we would not have had the Crusades, the Inquisition, and priests molesting school boys, to name just three horrors perpetrated in the name of religion.
Not sure what Softly expected. Official blessing from everyone for what I suspect she knows is wrong on so MANY levels? Impressing everyone that her husband gets to fuck a star, when we mere mortals don't? But to say that NOT blessing this bad idea makes everyone a baptist preacher is LUDICROUS. LMAO, as Literoticans like to say.
-- Latina
----------------------
Don't mess with me, young man, because to quote Tommy Lee Jones in Men In Black, "You have NO idea what you're dealing with!"
As to Softly and "Baptist Chat Room", most of us probably have nothing against sex outside of marriage PER SE, I had sex before I was married, between marriages, and with Frank before we married. But once you make that commitment to love and honor a marriage partner, you shouldn't betray that partner, EVEN if the partner says it is OK, else why get married in the first place or why not divorce? If you make a commitment to give 100% per cent to the person you love, and then say oh well it doesn't count if I stray with a famous person, where is the trust and honesty and commitment and loyalty and cherishing of your partner?
And his reasons for straying STINK! Because the person is famous. Because the opportunity is there. Because you said it was OK (if he really loves you, he shouldn't have had to even ASK, he should have not wanted to do it because he wants only you). I may not be a supermodel, but I guarantee if I paraded down the street nude and asked ten straight guys to fuck me at least nine would, and so what, what does that prove if it's just random sex with a thing that you don't even view as a person, and it betrays your commitment to the spouse you love? That sort of sex with an object is for vibrators, not real people with real feelings. But asking a man (or woman) to love you 100% and you loving them back 100%, and FINDING that person and sticking to that "in sickness and in health, for richer or for poorer", takes true character that so few people (except, of course, most Literoticans) have, and evidently your spouse lacks.
I am about the LEAST religious person you could ever meet, and religion has nothing to do with it; being a good person of good character who honors the commimtent to the one you love has NOTHING to do with religion, it has to do with strength of character! That is what has had so many so upset with Clinton for so long--not that he can't EVER keep it in his pants, but that he betrays Hilary with Monica, betrays Monica with Paula and lots of others, and lies to EVERYONE about it all--NO character! Some have chosen to MAKE that a religious issue, but if religion equaled character, we would not have had the Crusades, the Inquisition, and priests molesting school boys, to name just three horrors perpetrated in the name of religion.
Not sure what Softly expected. Official blessing from everyone for what I suspect she knows is wrong on so MANY levels? Impressing everyone that her husband gets to fuck a star, when we mere mortals don't? But to say that NOT blessing this bad idea makes everyone a baptist preacher is LUDICROUS. LMAO, as Literoticans like to say.
-- Latina
----------------------
Don't mess with me, young man, because to quote Tommy Lee Jones in Men In Black, "You have NO idea what you're dealing with!"
wolfy
Really Experienced
- Joined
- Sep 30, 2000
- Posts
- 299
Well I belive in putting yourself in someone elses shoes
before you judge them. So I say to myself hmm if I was dating
and Krysty Swanson showed up...I've always thought she was
really hot and there is no way she isn't nice at least in my
mind. And she liked me and wanted to sleep with me...what
would I do? I think it would depend on the relationship I
have with my gf. If I thought it would hurt her at all I
wouldn't bring it up, but if I knew her well enough that I
was sure she would be ok with it....Shrug really would depend.
I definatly think it would be a hard decision and if the
roles were reversed I'm pretty sure I would understand and
be ok with it. I would probably be really worried that she
would go away with him and leave me tho and she would prob
feel the same way so like I said unless it was something
we had talked about before and I was sure of how she would
feel I wouldn't bring it up.
before you judge them. So I say to myself hmm if I was dating
and Krysty Swanson showed up...I've always thought she was
really hot and there is no way she isn't nice at least in my
mind. And she liked me and wanted to sleep with me...what
would I do? I think it would depend on the relationship I
have with my gf. If I thought it would hurt her at all I
wouldn't bring it up, but if I knew her well enough that I
was sure she would be ok with it....Shrug really would depend.
I definatly think it would be a hard decision and if the
roles were reversed I'm pretty sure I would understand and
be ok with it. I would probably be really worried that she
would go away with him and leave me tho and she would prob
feel the same way so like I said unless it was something
we had talked about before and I was sure of how she would
feel I wouldn't bring it up.
SOFTLY PLEASE READ!
ok, i hope to make this brief, so you see why we responded negatively!
you said:
In the past, my husband has worked on a project with a female movie star, who is now out of favor because she is in her early forties. He will again be with her for three days this coming weekend. He hinted that he thought that he could "Make her." I told him to "Go for it." Would you have?
well, our problem is that nowhere in here did you indicate that he expressed interest in her as a person. you said he hinted-
we don't know what he said, but you used the phrase "make her" that may have just been the phrase you chose- we saw it as objectifying her, Presumably because she's famous
you mentioned that she's famous- you didn't have to. we took that to mean you all felt that was a defining (and restricting) attribute,... would you have said that she's black?
you later said you have an open relationship- that is ok. it's yours to have however you want.
all the people that answered you view sex as an expression of love, you didn't mention love. that struck a chord in us romantics.
i have never idolized another person- not my mom, not a celebrity, not a single person. so i can't relate with you on that level. i would think it would ruin to pull that person off the pedastal,...
we only had your words to go on- perhaps it came out wrong, or we took it wrong, i apologize for being one of many to criticize your choice- our answer to your question would we do the same- a unaniomous "no."
i'm sorry you didn't hear what you want but i hope you read every one of these posts- they were to give you perspective-
evaluate your feelings about love and sex- if you're happy with your decision, feel free to get online tell us to fuck off.
ok, i hope to make this brief, so you see why we responded negatively!
you said:
In the past, my husband has worked on a project with a female movie star, who is now out of favor because she is in her early forties. He will again be with her for three days this coming weekend. He hinted that he thought that he could "Make her." I told him to "Go for it." Would you have?
well, our problem is that nowhere in here did you indicate that he expressed interest in her as a person. you said he hinted-
we don't know what he said, but you used the phrase "make her" that may have just been the phrase you chose- we saw it as objectifying her, Presumably because she's famous
you mentioned that she's famous- you didn't have to. we took that to mean you all felt that was a defining (and restricting) attribute,... would you have said that she's black?
you later said you have an open relationship- that is ok. it's yours to have however you want.
all the people that answered you view sex as an expression of love, you didn't mention love. that struck a chord in us romantics.
i have never idolized another person- not my mom, not a celebrity, not a single person. so i can't relate with you on that level. i would think it would ruin to pull that person off the pedastal,...
we only had your words to go on- perhaps it came out wrong, or we took it wrong, i apologize for being one of many to criticize your choice- our answer to your question would we do the same- a unaniomous "no."
i'm sorry you didn't hear what you want but i hope you read every one of these posts- they were to give you perspective-
evaluate your feelings about love and sex- if you're happy with your decision, feel free to get online tell us to fuck off.
Savage Kitten
Image IS Everything
- Joined
- Apr 16, 2000
- Posts
- 2,677
sexaholic said:
OMG!!! I wished I had thought of that question first!! *sly mischievous grin*
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