Would you ever tell the people you work with......
- Thread starter phace5
- Start date
Richard49
The Gentleman Dom
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- Feb 27, 2002
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- 14,176
phace5 said:
Sounds like she would like to whip you
I have said this many times
over and over
I answer questions people aske me honestly
I tell them no mopre then they ask
Now I have a history of ending up with inexperenced submissives
How do I get them without telling them anything?
I start slow
very slow
and if I do not see any of the signs
I do not start
or I stop
Hecate
Lady Hecate will do
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NO!
private is private and work is work - those people don't need to know any of this about me.
I will joke and I will not bluntly ly, but I will change the topic immediately should things get too private for my taste, not only in respect of my sensual and sexual preferences.
private is private and work is work - those people don't need to know any of this about me.
I will joke and I will not bluntly ly, but I will change the topic immediately should things get too private for my taste, not only in respect of my sensual and sexual preferences.
Like Richard, I will answer to a FEW people, if I am asked, but they are specific people, who know I am in the lifestyle, by certain hints. I do not offer information about my sex life, I consider that private.. and for the most part, in my straight-laced office, I think it could get me looked down on in a severe way.
bunny bondage
just cruisin' through
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heh, i'm lucky enough to work at home. my dad is a computer programer and i get all of the little odd jobs he doesn't want to deal with. so, since i guess the only person i work with is my dad -- HELL NO! i don't want to know the details of his sex life, and he doesn't want to know anything about mine (except who it involves)
Actually, just today I was talking with a really quiet nilla friend of mine. He knows very little about me and I don't know much about him. However, he told me he has strange dreams in which he's sexually torturing tied up women. That's all he said on the topic, no descriptions (which I wanted to hear some new input for ideas).
I knew he wasn't interested in anything to do with the lifestyle. So since he was pretty inexperianced I gave him a quick dream analysis and told him that it's alright for a virgin to have very vivid dreams about sex. Because he knows very little about it his mind would persue that which is most alien and even extreme in contradiction to his tastes. Then I told him I was into BDSM and that whatever dreams he has can't be more extreme than my fantasies. Unfortunately I didn't realize there was a teacher about thirty feet away so I don't know if she heard either.
First person I tell at my school about my lifestyle and the most talkative teacher overhears me... sheesh
I knew he wasn't interested in anything to do with the lifestyle. So since he was pretty inexperianced I gave him a quick dream analysis and told him that it's alright for a virgin to have very vivid dreams about sex. Because he knows very little about it his mind would persue that which is most alien and even extreme in contradiction to his tastes. Then I told him I was into BDSM and that whatever dreams he has can't be more extreme than my fantasies. Unfortunately I didn't realize there was a teacher about thirty feet away so I don't know if she heard either.
First person I tell at my school about my lifestyle and the most talkative teacher overhears me... sheesh
JoseIsWild
Really Really Experienced
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I never volunteer that information, but a few guys at work that I hang out with all the time got into a conversation about BDSM and they asked me if I was. I told them that I use handcuffs on my girlfriend. However, I never reveal too much detail about what I do.
DisGirlisNutz
Literotica Guru
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What is the big deal about telling someone you are into BDsm? 
I am so tired about people having the misconception about BDsm that I do want to tell them about it. I think it is such a wonderful thing that I do tell people about the lifestyle. In my oponion the more people we tell and the more become interested in it. The less people think we are freaks or something. Too many people are in the dark about it. I let them know there are many levels of BDsm. You can take it as far as you want it to go. It is a lifestyle that you take at your own pace. People do look at me kind of wierd when talking about it, however, after talking and explaining it they are amazed and wanting to know more and more. They eventually get into it themselves. Actually a few have attended BDsm Fetish Parties parties and very much enjoyed attending them. (and still do)
I would think we would want our community to grow.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This is my .02 cnets. But then I am a vouyer, how else am I supposed to think?
I am so tired about people having the misconception about BDsm that I do want to tell them about it. I think it is such a wonderful thing that I do tell people about the lifestyle. In my oponion the more people we tell and the more become interested in it. The less people think we are freaks or something. Too many people are in the dark about it. I let them know there are many levels of BDsm. You can take it as far as you want it to go. It is a lifestyle that you take at your own pace. People do look at me kind of wierd when talking about it, however, after talking and explaining it they are amazed and wanting to know more and more. They eventually get into it themselves. Actually a few have attended BDsm Fetish Parties parties and very much enjoyed attending them. (and still do)
I would think we would want our community to grow.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This is my .02 cnets. But then I am a vouyer, how else am I supposed to think?
lark sparrow
Literotica Guru
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I have talked about it before, but only with those I had developed a particularly close, personal relationships with in the working relationship. Usually, I would not and have not. Unless you have hours to talk about it if they're 'nilla, confidentiality and relative assurance that it will not effect the working relationship or environment I think it has the chance of doing much more harm than good in a traditional corporate setting. Work before play or politics when it comes to source of income. I know people talk about their spouse or kids all the time at work, but they don't expect to hear in return that I am a lesbian with a Mistress, and that although I like kids, I really couldn't eat a whole one.
Blackbich
Literotica Guru
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It depends on the person. In general, no I would not. Despite its reputation, Southern Nevada is *very* conservative and I could be fired for violating some unwritten morals clause although I've never signed anything. That whole 'upholding the image of the workplace' thing. I have joked with a couple of my co-workers about using strap-ons and whips but, as far as they know, it was a joke. They don't know it's stuff I'll be doing for real. 
WynEternal
Beyond Insanity
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My private life is private and when I did work, they didn't need to know. Living in the Bible Belt doesn't help much either.
Vulpesvulpes
Really Experienced
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an unequivocal no!
I have worked in different settings in the past where no one cared and I was open about it to people who would ask or seemed curious.
With the kind of work I do now, I could not afford for the wrong people to find out. If they did, I could lose my job. Our contracts have a "moral terpitude" clause that can cover just about anything. Fighting the termination in court is not an option.
That's why I hang out here. I feel like I belong to a community of like-minded individuals who won't judge me, even if we get off on different things.
-Vv
I have worked in different settings in the past where no one cared and I was open about it to people who would ask or seemed curious.
With the kind of work I do now, I could not afford for the wrong people to find out. If they did, I could lose my job. Our contracts have a "moral terpitude" clause that can cover just about anything. Fighting the termination in court is not an option.
That's why I hang out here. I feel like I belong to a community of like-minded individuals who won't judge me, even if we get off on different things.
-Vv
psiberzerker
Literotica Guru
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I'm pretty damned open about my sexuality, and I've discovered that many people have more trouble with my Bi-sexuality than my sadomasochism. Part of this is due to the straight double standard whereby it's somehow more acceptable for women to be Bi, than men.
A good anectdote about comming out at work happened to me at a three star resuraunt I worked at. I don't wear logos unless I'm being payed to advertize (Not the other way around) so I had to change in the stock room. Someone came in for a #10 can of something, and saw my bare back while I was reaching for my shirt.
"Tha fuck?" was my first clue that someone had seen the belt marks, scratches, and circular hemotomas, so I turned around.
"Got lucky last night," was the best I could come up with at the time.
"I'd hate to see you after a bad night," was his response. Later, I wound up ion a fist fight with the same guy after I mentioned that I'd had sex with another man. He shrugged off the obvious fact that I liked getting ripped in bed, but became violent when I actually tyhreatened his own sexuality.
I think that the closet door has bars on it. I don't like being caged, so I refuse to do it to myself. On the other hand, I get extremely angry when I'm outed by someone else. If nothing else, I want the satisfaction of seeing their response. That's just my manipulative side.
Sexuality is a deeply personal thing. Interference with someone's sexuality is a breach of that, not quite rape, but somewhere on the same spectrum. I try not to out people, and demand the same from others. If they want to tell, I let them, but just because I'm informed, doesn't mean I'm willing to take that as permiossion to tell others. That's abuse in the true sense.
A good anectdote about comming out at work happened to me at a three star resuraunt I worked at. I don't wear logos unless I'm being payed to advertize (Not the other way around) so I had to change in the stock room. Someone came in for a #10 can of something, and saw my bare back while I was reaching for my shirt.
"Tha fuck?" was my first clue that someone had seen the belt marks, scratches, and circular hemotomas, so I turned around.
"Got lucky last night," was the best I could come up with at the time.
"I'd hate to see you after a bad night," was his response. Later, I wound up ion a fist fight with the same guy after I mentioned that I'd had sex with another man. He shrugged off the obvious fact that I liked getting ripped in bed, but became violent when I actually tyhreatened his own sexuality.
I think that the closet door has bars on it. I don't like being caged, so I refuse to do it to myself. On the other hand, I get extremely angry when I'm outed by someone else. If nothing else, I want the satisfaction of seeing their response. That's just my manipulative side.
Sexuality is a deeply personal thing. Interference with someone's sexuality is a breach of that, not quite rape, but somewhere on the same spectrum. I try not to out people, and demand the same from others. If they want to tell, I let them, but just because I'm informed, doesn't mean I'm willing to take that as permiossion to tell others. That's abuse in the true sense.
