Women Should Use Sex to Get Ahead?

[JackLuis]

Reality gets real!

The term was coined in the recently published Erotic Capital: The Power of Attraction in the Boardroom and the Bedroom. The author, Cathrine Hakim, successfully set off a blizzard of controversy arguing that women should exploit their sex appeal to move ahead. Her theory is perfumed with the compelling smell of radical pragmatism. To the Sunday Times she says: “We live in a sexualized age: that’s the trend. Let’s just relax ... There’s not much point in swimming against the tide,”

What do you think about this idea, that women should use their God given talents?

 

[El Folo]

Well, you know me, I'm always in favor of Kumite to solve all our problems, but hey, whatever works, works?

Didn't some Greek Priestesses use sex/prostitution as prayer or something?

 

[CarlusMagnus]

"Should women use sex to get ahead?"

A woman should do so if, and only if, she likes getting head.

 

[Handley_Page]

Sorry, but is using 'sex appeal' something new ?
They often already do (one way or another).

 

[PoppingTom]

What do you think about this idea, that women should use their God given talents?

It depends.

If competence is the matter, you better be decent to show you don't need these talents for going ahead.

On the other hand: it's a damn cock-driven world.....

 

[Vioan]

Even if I'm a rather modest person, I freely admit that my dresses are slightly more revealing when I'm going to an oral exam, and the professor is somebody who might be affected positively by this. I don't think that we should just spread our legs when we want something from a man, but using the assets we have is not a bad thing.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

KEWL, but remember this!

SHE DOESNT WANT YOU, SHE WANTS YOUR JOB.

 

[Iamnotthe1]

I'm all for using your sex appeal to get ahead. Unfortunately, in my profession it would get you fired. Ofcourse there aren't many men around anyway.

 

[Boxlicker101]

Up to a point, I would even recommend, but women who overdo it will run afoul of the Peter Principle (No pun intended.)

Of course, it can backfire too. A woman who deserves a promotion might lose out on it if she tries to use her sex appeal to get it and the person deciding the promotions takes exception.

 

[3113]

I appreciate the pragmatism and reality check. However, I think the "controversy" surrounding this is understandable. First is simply that decades of women have worked very hard to be taken seriously. We have here the shadow of a stereotype that says that women only get a job to meet a man and get married. That they don't want to work, don't take pride in work, can't do a job like a man, etc.--i.e. can't rise on competence, only on looks. Urging a woman to use her sex appeal to get a job plays right into that old stereotype. So the advice to use their "god given talents" is also advice that sounds very much like validating male chauvinism.

Second, I think we'd like to see advice that doesn't state the obvious but, rather, tries to change the dynamic for everyone's benefit, not just so one gal or one guy can succeed in business without really trying. So the selfishness of the advice is unsettling.

And finally, how good can this advice be given that it's advice with an expiration date? Presumably, with age competency levels, expertise, etc. go up. Yet with age sex appeal goes down. If one relies on sex appeal to rise or fall, then even as one gets better at a job, one is going to be less likely to get the job because what one typically uses to get it is vanishing. The advice makes women rely on something that isn't going to always be there.

So, this advice is true, yes. Pragmatic, yes. But in the current climate of failing businesses, fraud, of experienced (if not sexy) workers being unemployed and women's pay vs. men getting even worse...I really don't see it as all that "affirming" of women workers.

 

[JackLuis]

I appreciate the pragmatism - So the advice to use their "god given talents" is also advice that sounds very much like validating male chauvinism.

- If one relies on sex appeal to rise or fall, then even as one gets better at a job, one is going to be less likely to get the job because what one typically uses to get it is vanishing. The advice makes women rely on something that isn't going to always be there.

So, this advice is true, yes. Pragmatic, yes. But in the current climate of failing businesses, fraud, of experienced (if not sexy) workers being unemployed and women's pay vs. men getting even worse...I really don't see it as all that "affirming" of women workers.

Perhaps this shows an age divide in Feminist thought? The young MBA using her sex appeal to get that key promotion into a budgeted position, just that can make or break you in the first year.
So can you blame the good looking, well dressed, immaculately made up, hotty, for pressing for a executive job instead of as an assistant?

Pitted against this opposition, you have the Milf'ish who is past her prime and has been an assistant for long enough, who is forced to cast a contrast about experience and economy to compete?

Add a dashing young VP of Accounting and a lecherous CFO and there is your Bunny!

 

[Verdad]

Perhaps this shows an age divide in Feminist thought?

It sure does. The author of that book is 63.

 

[NoJo]

I think if more women dressed as bunny girls the worlds would be a better place. Call me an old fashioned old grump but those are the values I grew up with, the values that have built America and I'll be DAMNED if you denigrate my flag.

 

[JackLuis]

It sure does. The author of that book is 63.

Poor research skills I guess, on my part?

But that is a interesting insight, and confuses the shit outa me?

Perhaps she just recognizes that sex sells and there is no time for performance reviews to insure advancment?

 

[voluptuary_manque]

In an interview with the author that I read a while back, I believe that she was aiming her book primarily at the young, entry-level female worker. As I understood it, she grudgingly recognized that the world was slanted towards male advancement and that any woman who wanted to get anywhere needed to start as high as she could. Hence the suggestion that, while she has it, a woman should definitely cash in her Erotic Capital because it is a perishable commodity and needs to be used while it still exists. Then, having placed herself higher than her more modest competition to begin with, she could use her skills and intelligence to advance further throughout the remainder of her career.

Would it really work? I'm not sure. A woman who does indeed expend Erotic Capital in the workplace might well end up with the reputation of Company Tart and have a hard time getting taken seriously once her skills and intelligence were brought to play on the bottom line. Playing the Erotic ace might leave you judged as one who only holds one hand.

 

[Handley_Page]

In an interview with the author that I read a while back, I believe that she was aiming her book primarily at the young, entry-level female worker. As I understood it, she grudgingly recognized that the world was slanted towards male advancement and that any woman who wanted to get anywhere needed to start as high as she could. Hence the suggestion that, while she has it, a woman should definitely cash in her Erotic Capital because it is a perishable commodity and needs to be used while it still exists. Then, having placed herself higher than her more modest competition to begin with, she could use her skills and intelligence to advance further throughout the remainder of her career.

Would it really work? I'm not sure. A woman who does indeed expend Erotic Capital in the workplace might well end up with the reputation of Company Tart and have a hard time getting taken seriously once her skills and intelligence were brought to play on the bottom line. Playing the Erotic ace might leave you judged as one who only holds one hand.

A pal of mine once told me of a "how to get on in Judo" if the student is a female. After getting that new belt, others might well comment "Muni Waza", which I gather is "breast throw".

 

[R. Richard]

All I can tell you is that back when I was working for a large company, we used to scan the employment applications for a girl who filled in the Sex item in the questionnaire with Yes!

 

[BuckyDuckman]

Surprised to learn women I respect have done this

In recent years, I've had women I respect for the merits of their work admit to me, they've consciously tweaked their business wear in a sexual direction for key interviews. I was shocked.

To me, it's a damn distraction for a woman to head in that direction. As a hiring manager, it makes the interview more difficult. Aside from being tempted to look and admire, I'm questioning in the back of my mind if she's trying to play her way up the ladder.

Two stories from my life related to this topic:

1) A young, attractive woman with large breasts who worked for me once leaned over my shoulder, purposely rubbing her breasts against my arm, and asked what I was doing. I mentioned the paperwork problem I was solving and she cooed, "I'd sure like to learn how to do that one day..." rub-rub-rub. I turned around, looked directly at her chest, then her eyes, and flatly told her, "Maybe one day you'll get the chance, but not because of those. My sister has a pair of those. I wasn't impressed with hers and I'm sure not impressed with yours." After that, she and I got along wonderfully and she never tried a bullshit move like that again.

2) I was having an affair with a co-worker, and yes, she was a subordinant. She literally threw herself at me, convinced me it was a genuine attraction for me, and we had quite a bit of fun. Later, a position opened up that she wanted and I had to fight long and hard with myself to sort out if she was the best candidate for the job or if I was considering her because of the affair. Annoying clutter.

I guess where I end up on the primary topic is here: If a woman CAN do it, why not? It's a dog-eat-dog world out there and if she can do it and be somehow ethical about it (like, by not threatening a sexual harrassment lawsuit), then why not? Meanwhile, any guy who falls for her displays (of affection, sexuality, or body parts) is a fucking idiot. Personally, I'd rather work with a roomful of competent frumpy women than a roomful of beautiful, but dumb as a box of rocks women.

 

[Stella_Omega]

it's a pretty frustrating situation. I don't approve. I've worked alongside, or over, or under, women who had no skills in their business. Since I am also female, they don't bother to turn on the charm for me-- and if your superior is female and she gets caught out not knowing her job, she will try to pass on the blame to the nearest female underling.

And the other side of the coin is the men who prefer to work with men, hire men by preference, and make sex jokes about the few women who they do end up working with. This is especially rife in the tech industry, and oddly enough very few female geeks are comfortable with that kind of behavior, and tend to want to leave-- leave the conventions, leave the companies.

I don't approve of that, either.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

I'm retired, but when I worked I discovered that there are 2 roads to take for career advancement:

You can suck your bosses dick or you can master your position by learning how to do it better than most AND volunteering for every piece-o-shit assignment that comes along. Bosses luv it when you toot their lil weiner whistles but they LOVE money and freedom from headaches more.

And when they prefer the tooting to money and stress free living, its a sure sign that the job aint gonna improve your resume.

 

[BuckyDuckman]

Agreed!

I'm retired, but when I worked I discovered that there are 2 roads to take for career advancement:

You can suck your bosses dick or you can master your position by learning how to do it better than most AND volunteering for every piece-o-shit assignment that comes along. Bosses luv it when you toot their lil weiner whistles but they LOVE money and freedom from headaches more.

And when they prefer the tooting to money and stress free living, its a sure sign that the job aint gonna improve your resume.

Where's the freakin' "like" button? LOL!

 

[Boobies84]

Personally, I like being damn good at my job, while alsogiving the middle-aged married men something to think about when they're in their lonely hotel rooms at night. I get my promotions because I deserve them, but there's no reason to ignore the added bonus of a little sexual tension. Never so overt as to be obvious (and alienate female coworkers), but just enough to generate some warm feelings on a cold night. I think that's the best way to do business.