Dixon Carter Lee
Headliner
- Joined
- Nov 22, 1999
- Posts
- 48,681
I'm at a gas station when I notice this woman with a flat tire about to pull out into busy traffic. I run over screaming, "Honey, you don't want to pull out, you've got a flat tire!" She says, "I know. I was going to drive home and let my boyfriend change it."
O-kay.
I say, "It's completely flat. You're going to ruin your rim. You're not going to get 10 feet, and you'll be in the middle of traffic. Stop here, and I'll change it for you." She pulls over and says, "Do you have the tools?"
O-kay.
I say, "I'm sure you have 'the tools'. Let's open the trunk." So I get out her tire and jack, but there's nothing to crank the jack with; I'm looking for a handle when she picks up the tiny screw I just removed to get her tire out and she says "Is this it?"
"Um. No."
I put the spare on and she asks, "Aren't you going to put the hubcap back on?"
"It's a spare. It's smaller. The hupcap won't fit. It's for your other tire. You're an idiot."
I notice a giant gash in the old tire, which was the cause of the flat, and I asked her how that happened.
"I hit the curb." she says.
She'd have to actually run over a curb several times to cause that gash, and I'm perfectly willing to believe she did.
Women shouldn't drive.
Or vote.
Or drink.
Or take this thread seriously.
O-kay.
I say, "It's completely flat. You're going to ruin your rim. You're not going to get 10 feet, and you'll be in the middle of traffic. Stop here, and I'll change it for you." She pulls over and says, "Do you have the tools?"
O-kay.
I say, "I'm sure you have 'the tools'. Let's open the trunk." So I get out her tire and jack, but there's nothing to crank the jack with; I'm looking for a handle when she picks up the tiny screw I just removed to get her tire out and she says "Is this it?"
"Um. No."
I put the spare on and she asks, "Aren't you going to put the hubcap back on?"
"It's a spare. It's smaller. The hupcap won't fit. It's for your other tire. You're an idiot."
I notice a giant gash in the old tire, which was the cause of the flat, and I asked her how that happened.
"I hit the curb." she says.
She'd have to actually run over a curb several times to cause that gash, and I'm perfectly willing to believe she did.
Women shouldn't drive.
Or vote.
Or drink.
Or take this thread seriously.
