Why can't it just be about S-E-X?

[Kymberley]

I have heard from a few that I am an exception to the rule. I am one woman who could care less about a meaningful, loving relationship with a man. I would prefer it to be just about sex so when we are done, I can get up, wash off, get dressed and go home.

I don't want to cook and clean for them, or do their laundry, I just want to fuck and go on with my day.

Is that so wrong?

How many other women feel this way, or am I the only one.

I have several male friends that I am close enough with to discuss this, and no I haven't fucked them yet and won't cuz they are just friends, but they keep telling me this.

 

[Calamity Jane]

maybe it's a missouri thing

I'm married now, but when i was single, i'd call up a guy friend and if neither of us were busy, we'd fuck. then i'd go home, or he'd go home, and we'd go on. I had no interest in anything else from him... no promises, flowers, none of that crap.

actually, the biggest thing i miss being married (for 7 years now) is a meaningless fuck... eveything's wrapped up together now and it's not simple anymore... waaaahhhhhhhh

anyway, i think it's perfectly normal for a woman to not want to be involved with a guy just because she happens to be fucking him.

 

[Oliver Clozoff]

ummm... what did you say your phone number was again, Kymberly?

 

[Shy Tall Guy]

I have heard from a few that I am an exception to the rule. I am one woman who could care less about a meaningful, loving relationship with a man. I would prefer it to be just about sex so when we are done, I can get up, wash off, get dressed and go home.

I don't want to cook and clean for them, or do their laundry, I just want to fuck and go on with my day.

I don't need a woman to take care of me - I have been taking care of such chores for over 30 years - but I do want the companionship and sex is just part of that, albeit a very important part to me. Just the same, I would rather do without the sex than suffer with an incompatible partner.

Is that so wrong?

Depends on the ramifications - there are a lot for casual sex if care is not taken. In and of itself sex is not bad or wrong, whether it be casual or in a relationship, but most people tend to develop relationships with the people they have sex with - it is just human nature. And that is when things can go wrong.

How many other women feel this way, or am I the only one.

I have several male friends that I am close enough with to discuss this, and no I haven't fucked them yet and won't cuz they are just friends, but they keep telling me this.

Women being humans want relationships for the most part - so maybe you are the exception to the rule. Men want them too, but being the human animal we are we tend to be more like the animal males we evolved from and sex can be engaged in with less meaning. For a woman sex has meant offspring and nesting for a long long time until we recently came up with birth control. So women (in general) have a much higher price to pay for sex, and they tend to generally want the security of a relationship for their children.

Sure that has all changed somewhat now, but it is still human nature, and a few birth control inventions are not going to change millenia of evolution.

STG

 

[lilminx]

I think with me it depends on the guy- I'm one of those people who CAN separate sex and love. Certain guys I've just had fuck-friendships with; others I've wanted to hang out with outside of the bedroom as well. For the past few years I haven't met anyone I've wanted to be exclusive with, so I guess I feel the same way you do, Kymberley.

 

[*bratcat*]

 

[MissTaken]

You're not alone Kym.

Yes. I would hope someday to find that special person.

However, I have a friend or two that will come to see me when I feel like fucking. No strings attached, no commitments, no jealousy and NO dirty socks to wash etc. We have a great time and go along our separate ways.

 

[sigh]

i have mixed thoughts on this...

aside from my current love, my experiences have been very limited, but without fail they (both of them) were just for sex, and both were very good friends

now, on the other hand, i'm deeply involved with another and it's hard to picture another person in my bed, but i'm not so silly to think that couldn't change...i'm young and life can be long, after all

but one thing is certain (to my mind, at least): there is nothing wrong with sex for the sake of sex, just so it is safe and consensual (well, if it weren't the latter it wouldn't be sex, would it?) and truly without strings...then i think it's cool

and bratcat? though you weren't asking me, my answer to your question would be no...and i'm not sure how that fits into this equation at all

 

[Tipsy]

Damn

Y can't my friends be like that well i had one long ago but the rest u know bah lucky bastards of friends you must have *me being a pig once more*

 

[April]

I wish it were that easy for me to have a "fuck buddy". But no, I'm one of "them"! The ones that just have to go and get all attached.

Or put another way. If I don't want to hang out with you, I'm certainly not going to fuck you! And if I want to fuck you, then I certainly want to hang out with you.

It's gotta be both with me. But it doesn't have to last forever, either.

 

[MissTaken]

Or put another way. If I don't want to hang out with you, I'm certainly not going to fuck you! And if I want to fuck you, then I certainly want to hang out with you.

It's gotta be both with me. But it doesn't have to last forever, either.

My "fuck buddies" are friends. Perhaps, I was misleading. We do hang out, but as friends do. We trust one another, but hold no miconceptions about our relationship. Our expectations are clear to each other. It is safe, consensual and a hell of a way to kill a few hours on a lonely night!

 

[April]

Hmm. I feel like I may have stepped on a toe or two? I hope not. Was just explaining about my own tendencies. I think it's great if a person can have those kind of low expectation relationships. It's just a bit difficult for me to do so. But I'm trying.

 

[Skally]

A "me too" answer?

Hope ya don't mind me jumping in here and adding my random thoughts here !

I hate to be one of those people who says "me too", but I have a few friendships with men that have developed into sexual ones.

It's not that we have any kind of relationship in the conventional form - as boyfriend / girlfriend.

We just get together occasionally for a few drinks, a chat, maybe a meal and then sex.

I feel totally safe with the people who I do this with. I never go out looking for stuff like this, it just happens to turn out that way. I often think about what would happen if either of us wanted to end it or wanted more than just sex - at the moment with each of the people I have sex with, I have a clear idea of where the relationship is going and how I think it might be going.

I often find that a truly open friendship (that may not include sex) is a really rewarding one. I've often had really shallow friendships in the past but recently I've met a couple of people I can be myself with. I find that more comforting than a sexual relationship - as boyfriend / girlfriend or casual sex sometimes.

Problems often arise when the people involved have a different outlook on the relationship and how it'll progress.

As long as you both feel safe and you're careful with regards to pregnancy and STD's then I see nothing wrong with it.

Back to playing round with my MP3's. Aaaah....that's better Some David Bowie

 

[Natalie Nessus]

.

 

[Paradox]

Okay, here's the next branch of this question... what if one or both of the friends are married?

 

[Young Knave]

This reminds me of that Seinfeld episode where Jerry and Elaine decide to have meaningless sex. It was funny. Turns out Elaine is not the type who can fuck and not get attached.

And I'm a guy, so of course I can seperate sex and love!

 

[Natalie Nessus]

.

 

[MissTaken]

Hmm. I feel like I may have stepped on a toe or two?

No, Angel!

These toes are in tact!

I think this issue has a lot to do with personal choice and comfort levels.

Paradox: My dear friend, fortunately that dilemma hasn't presented itself to me, yet. Well, it has, but it was no dilemma as she also wants to be included in our fun.

I am starting to feel sooooooooooo naughty!

 

[atastetoarouse]

Fascinating..........

You incredible, fascinating ladies!!

To want no holds barred, no strings attached sex......

Just incredible!

I only recently have ever run into a lady friend like this. Just buddies, working together, then boom! She just one nite wanted to go back to her place........ and we just went wild....... It was incredible!!

She, and you ladies, just fascinate me.........

 

[Mistress]

Damn sounds like how I use to be in real life and then in cyber world

 

[Kymberley]

Re: Re: Why can't it just be about S-E-X?

hmm...do you only fuck men?

I think there is nothing wrong with that, as long as you are in the "socially acceptable" place in life to follow through.

LOL you are in luck *bratty* bi-sexual

 

[Kymberley]

Hmm. I feel like I may have stepped on a toe or two? I hope not. Was just explaining about my own tendencies. I think it's great if a person can have those kind of low expectation relationships. It's just a bit difficult for me to do so. But I'm trying.

Not at all April. I do understand that. I used to feel that way a few years ago. Now, I just don't want to know anything about them. I don't care if they snore or where they work or what they do for fun.

I don't really call them buddies at all. I don't want to see them or even talk to them unless it is to make plans on when and where.

I just care about the sex part. Don't get me wrong, I am very careful, safe sex is something that is a must, but I could meet them and fuck them the same night. I just don't get that emotional attachment. Don't want it. I could care less if I ever heard from them again.

I have a great boytoy, but he has that sick puppy doggy lovestruck look in his eyes that drive me nuts. I decided to keep him for a little while, but I don't want the love crap. I have tried to tell him this over and over again. But he is not listening. He seems to think that I secretly want more and he is the one to make me see that.

So, as long as I make him do it from behind, I don't have to see them looking at me.

 

[*bratcat*]

Hot Damn!!

 

[SweetNick]

I have a great boytoy, but he has that sick puppy doggy lovestruck look in his eyes that drive me nuts. I decided to keep him for a little while, but I don't want the love crap. I have tried to tell him this over and over again. But he is not listening. He seems to think that I secretly want more and he is the one to make me see that.

So, as long as I make him do it from behind, I don't have to see them looking at me.

Kym, that's fuckin' hilarious! If he won't do it from behind, just turn off the light!

 

[Kymberley]

Re: Hot Damn!!

Well, I am not bi............



So we will just have to work on that one.


























yet! But I might be with the right teacher!