Why are men such ASSHOLES?!

[amiss]

UGH.
I try to involve myself in things he enjoys. I try to enjoy myself while doing those things. But then he goes and does/says something that he knows will bother me. He's especially good at doing it "in public" (even if it's just a few people we have over).

How the fuck am I supposed to "reassure" him that things are going to work out, and that we have a future, when he acts like such an ass???

 

[Phoenyx]

YOU dont . Tell him to fuck off cause he is an asshole and see how fast he changes his tune.

 

[Mischka]

How the fuck am I supposed to "reassure" him that things are going to work out, and that we have a future, when he acts like such an ass???

Why do you want a future with a man that intentionally tries to hurt you?

 

[RastaPope]

I'll tell you how to fix it if you suck my cock, bee-otch.

 

[Johnny Mayberry]

UGH.
I try to involve myself in things he enjoys. I try to enjoy myself while doing those things. But then he goes and does/says something that he knows will bother me. He's especially good at doing it "in public" (even if it's just a few people we have over).

How the fuck am I supposed to "reassure" him that things are going to work out, and that we have a future, when he acts like such an ass???

Ummm...don't blame everyone with a penis, just because you got a defective one. Here's my question: why should you try to reassure him of anything? Is he your man, or your child? Maybe you should seriously consider the relationship...have you told him about how you feel when he treats you this way?

 

[HarleydevilzoN]

YOU dont . Tell him to fuck off cause he is an asshole and see how fast he changes his tune.

I agree... If he does something like that intentionally HE has a problem

 

[RosevilleCAguy]

UGH.
I try to involve myself in things he enjoys. I try to enjoy myself while doing those things. But then he goes and does/says something that he knows will bother me. He's especially good at doing it "in public" (even if it's just a few people we have over).

How the fuck am I supposed to "reassure" him that things are going to work out, and that we have a future, when he acts like such an ass???

Point of order please.

Its "man" not "men."

I'd check into why I wanted to stay with this guy. It sounds like he has issues.

 

[cybergirly]

UGH.
I try to involve myself in things he enjoys. I try to enjoy myself while doing those things. But then he goes and does/says something that he knows will bother me. He's especially good at doing it "in public" (even if it's just a few people we have over).

How the fuck am I supposed to "reassure" him that things are going to work out, and that we have a future, when he acts like such an ass???

First off, what do you mean by "trying to involve yourself in things he enjoys"? If you don't enjoy them as well, why would you pretend to? Trying to change yourself for someone is not healthy. Secondly, when you say "he goes and does/says something that he knows will bother you" is it something huge? Does it pertain to you directly? Or is it something that you want to "change" about him? If the latter you can't do it, it'll never work.

If either of you need to be reassured it's going to work out. It probably wont.

 

[Barely__There]

UGH.
I try to involve myself in things he enjoys. I try to enjoy myself while doing those things. But then he goes and does/says something that he knows will bother me. He's especially good at doing it "in public" (even if it's just a few people we have over).

How the fuck am I supposed to "reassure" him that things are going to work out, and that we have a future, when he acts like such an ass???

Honey, that is a form of mental abuse, and although it may be hard, you need to call him on it. Stop reassuring him, and tell him he is fucking things up and you might not be there if he doesn't straighten up.

 

[Bent]

UGH.
I try to involve myself in things he enjoys. I try to enjoy myself while doing those things. But then he goes and does/says something that he knows will bother me. He's especially good at doing it "in public" (even if it's just a few people we have over).

How the fuck am I supposed to "reassure" him that things are going to work out, and that we have a future, when he acts like such an ass???

He is doing it to show everyone who is boss. Bust him down a few notches by simply rolling your eyes when he says stupid shit, or give him that "Yeah, you wish" smirk. Don't do anything you don't want to do. If you act like it bothers you, he will make it worse for you so stand your ground or get out of the relationship...I vote for getting the hell out, and fast. He gets off on demeaning you, so let him find another pigeon and get yourself a real rooster.

 

[bjewl]

UGH.
I try to involve myself in things he enjoys. I try to enjoy myself while doing those things. But then he goes and does/says something that he knows will bother me. He's especially good at doing it "in public" (even if it's just a few people we have over).

How the fuck am I supposed to "reassure" him that things are going to work out, and that we have a future, when he acts like such an ass???

Sounds like the person you're reassuring is yourself.
I would guess that he's belittling you in order to make himself feel more important. If his self esteem is so low that he needs to make someone he cares about feel bad in order to feel good himself ( BIG warning bells here,) he will not make a good partner with out change. Be upfront Tell him that his behaviour hurts you, which makes you angry. Tell him to stop. Don't tell him to try to stop. Tell him to STOP. If he won't, then walk, because it won't get better until you do.
Friends should do things they both enjoy, and should take enjoyment from their partners pleasures as well.
Lived through it. Lived it too, and I'm sorry for it. Good Luck. Hope he stops, some do.

 

[StarXChyld]

UGH.
I try to involve myself in things he enjoys. I try to enjoy myself while doing those things. But then he goes and does/says something that he knows will bother me. He's especially good at doing it "in public" (even if it's just a few people we have over).

How the fuck am I supposed to "reassure" him that things are going to work out, and that we have a future, when he acts like such an ass???

I think a lot of this depends on if you're married to this man or not. If not, it's much easier to make the decision to walk away. If you're married, it's a little stickier.

There are a couple of excellent books out there to help you through all of this. I believe both are by Robin Norwood. One is called "Women who Love Too Much" and the other is called "Co-dependent No More". The first will help you recognize the behavior of a co-dependent and the latter will help you avoid situations and people that trigger that response in you.

Been there. Done that. ::sighs:: And doing it again. Now where did I put those books???

PM me if you'd like to talk.

Star~

 

[Dillinger]

Men aren't assholes - that particular man is an asshole. Dump him and find a real man.

 

[kinkyme]

men are assholes
I'm getting a wife next

i know that didnt help... but you had enough serious posts