Whispersecret

[Gaucho]

MP, there was an auction thread going on .(It could STILL be going on for all I know.) I have no idea if I was bought there, because I didn't keep up with it.

All I know is that I'm not cheap!

Reasonable, maybe. But never cheap.

 

[Madame Pandora]

MP, there was an auction thread going on .(It could STILL be going on for all I know.) I have no idea if I was bought there, because I didn't keep up with it.

All I know is that I'm not cheap!

Still haven't heard two shillings....

LMAO!

MP (aka English Auctioneer Bitch)

 

[Guest]

I bid a zillyun shilings. So their. <giggles>

And no! Im not Whispersecret! she can spel!

 

[Madame Pandora]

I bid a zillyun shilings. So their. <giggles>

And no! Im not Whispersecret! she can spel!

Nice try, Whisper...

Okay....ONE SHILLING?

MP

 

[Guest]

No, rilly. I"m not whispersecret. I swear!!!!!! She uses extrem--er, super big words and i dont. Yeah.

 

[Madame Pandora]

No, rilly. I"m not whispersecret. I swear!!!!!! She uses extrem--er, super big words and i dont. Yeah.

You know...lightning conducts...think of your computer.

Do I hear a brass farthing?

MP

 

[Guest]

I bid one thousand pounds. If I don't have that paragon of womanhood, I shall go mad.

 

[Whispersecret]

By the way, skibum thought Nicole and I were duking it out with sarcasm. We weren't.

At least I wasn't. Nikki? You weren't being sarcastic were you?

Ahhh, see? Mr. Rickman has taste, Pandy. LOL.

 

[Guest]

I don't even know who this crazy bitch is, I'm certainly not paying a dime for her.

BTW...can anyone help me? I seem to have left my dick in Madame Pandora's box and I'm having trouble finding it....

 

[Guest]

You stupid shit. Madame can't even heat a fuckin' tortilla. At least Whisper can make gravy.

 

[Guest]

Yeah, but I hear her lamb sucks

 

[Whispersecret]

FYI, everyone. Don't bother coming in this thread anymore. MP and I are duking it out. Sorry!

 

[Madame Pandora]

I just got this crazy phone call....

Hey WS -

Some guy with an English accent just said he'd take you off my hands if I gave HIM two shillings.

At this rate, you'll put me out of the auction business.

Bloody hell.

MP

 

[Guest]

You are hereby notified that we of the Rights of Lambs Association take umbrage at your statement. This is clearly a case of defamation of the character of undercooked meat. Yes, there is free speech, but not at the expense of young sheep. If you ever run for president, we of the R.L.A. will NOT be contributing to your campaign!

 

[Guest]

Ignore the association, MP. It's all been just politics since they voted that wolf president. Now they're just a bunch of sell-outs.

We lambs have been trying to get this bitch sold into slavery for years now. Timothy Dalton says he might be willing to make an offer if he can have a sample of her gravy.

Don't give up. She is a baaaaaaaaaaaaad woman and needs to be stopped.

The Sheep

 

[Whispersecret]

As if I'd give Mr. Dalton any of my personal gravy, even if it was too thick. He was such a crappy James Bond, I even forgot he PLAYED him when I wrote H.T.

 

[Madame Pandora]

Seeing as Mr. Dalton is the only one bidding on you (with the exception of the controversial Alan Rickman impersonator) you might not want to be so snooty about his James Bond qualifications. Besides...I've heard your gravy needs practice.

LMAO

MP

 

[Whispersecret]

PFffft! That WAS Alan Rickman. I'd know that sensuous little semi-lisp of his anywhere. Besides, Sincere and Sincerer bid a lot!

<jerks her hands off her keyboard as if shocked>

Ouch! What the hell was that?

 

[Guest]

My client does not lisp

I don't know who you women think you are, but I am on the phone with both Timothy Dalton's agent AND the agent for the Ethical Treatment of Sheep. Whatever sleezy operation you're running won't be tolerated.

Personally, if this woman can't cook, no one's going to buy her with either American OR English money. Now, if you'll excuse me I have a date with a model who can't finish a Big Mac. I'll see your ass in court.

 

[Weird Harold]

I'm just a poor retiree...

Some guy with an English accent just said he'd take you off my hands if I gave HIM two shillings.

but, since we're dealing with old currency, and WS is such a nice person, I've got a genuine silver six-oence minted in 1958. I'd gladly give it up for WS.

 

[Madame Pandora]

Harold it is very sweet of you to be chivalrous...but consider carefully. The woman just murdered a perfectly innocent rack of lamb. Could you really live with a woman like that AND endure substandard gravy to boot?

MP

 

[Whispersecret]

WH, you're such a sweetheart! Smooch!

And for Christsake! It was a half a leg. And I can cook. I can bake a goddamn chocolate torte that would make you cry! And I can certainly heat up a frozen pizza without making the fire department jump out of bed.

Back atcha, MP!

 

[Weird Harold]

The woman just murdered a perfectly innocent rack of lamb. Could you really live with a woman like that AND endure substandard gravy to boot?

I would never have to endure substandard gravy! I know at least a dozen different ways to make great gravy from almost nothing.

As for that rack of lamb being innocent -- Hah! It was just lurking about in the freezer armed to the teeth with fat and cholesterol. I'll just have to teach her to like venison -- a nice lean meat with very little cholesterol.

 

[Guest]

What is this? Pick on Lamb Night? Just because Disney made a movie about cute little Bambi, we lambs are now chopped liver. I'll have you know that there's an animated feature coming out next Thanksgiving, called "Lammie: The Search for Mint Jelly," and it's a tear jerker!

And the powers that be already choked on their Eggs are Bad for You campaign. YOu can bet that we lambs are next to be vindicated!

 

[Madame Pandora]

Okay...first of all the fire department had NOTHING to do with my pizza you wench. And I like it crispy so there!

Second...I guess if Harold is willing to accept your gravy shortcomings AND take flack from the sheep. There's nothing I can do....


Going once....