Which is harder

[Jim_Henson]

Believing the wonderful things people seem to say about you, or believing the horrible thing?

And where does your natural self worth lean you in situations like that?

 

[Guest]

It's harder to believe the good stuff, and I lean to the negative.


Why? Self esteem, I guess. Growing up, you tend to hear more negatives than positives, so they stick with you more. People don't usually take the time to tell you good things but do react to bad ones easier. JMHO.

 

[SweetCherry]

I have a hard time believing the good things people say about me. I'm not overly blessed with high self esteem, so it's pretty obvious which way I lean.

 

[StrawberryPez]

I find it harder to believe the wonderful things people say about me. I have a very negative view on my self worth.

 

[QuickDuck]

defiantely harder to believe the good stuff.

society believes vanity is bad and if you believe the good stuff, then that could be considered being vain.

At the same time though, we are told to accept compliments.

Catch-22

 

[sunstruck]

Definitely easier to believe my faults. More difficult to hear about them, but easier to believe.

 

[mbb308]

I'm less concerned about my faults than the root causes of them. As a result, I'm pretty hip to them, and most people don't see them as intensely as I do.

I always smile and say, "Thank you," when someone compliments me. I have gotten better at believing them, too. I don't argue them anymore, either.

 

[Zmey]

sick of sweet talk ...kind of looking forward to some criticism ...

 

[aly*]

Believing the wonderful things people seem to say about you, or believing the horrible thing?

And where does your natural self worth lean you in situations like that?

Harder? The positive things. I lean to the neg. I wonder what it is like to not lean that way. To have the good stuff stand out more than the neg. I wonder if it affects how we percieve things in general, too. I'll stop babbling... . .now! lol(except to ask>) Is this tied into Pagan Cowgirl's thread?

 

[Rambling Rose]

I acknowledge most what I believe to be true of myself in the first place, be it positive or negative. If someone flatters me about something that I also believe to be pleasing about myself then it is apt and makes me feel good to have it noticed. By the same token if someone points out a negative trait that I feel is true then I will own up to it and, if it is someone I care for, I will try to downplay or alter that behaviour or attitude with them and perhaps apply it to other areas of my life.

I am not easily swayed by false flattery or put downs that I don't think are accurate. I have a very strong sense of myself and usually a very good intuition about others. It has just taken a lifetime to learn how to put it all together.

 

[Jim_Henson]

Re: Re: Which is harder

lol(except to ask>) Is this tied into Pagan Cowgirl's thread?

Um no, but I guess it could be... in that case YES

 

[Minkey Boodle]

~
As the resident Plastic Biotch Goddess, I get all sorts of horrible comments. Luckily, plastic doesn't have feelings, or I'd have killt myself by now.
~

I know the bad stuff about me, and the other people who notice it, get a cookie. As for the good stuff, I'll take it. I'm not sayin' I'll do anything with it, though.

 

[RosevilleCAguy]

Believing the wonderful things people seem to say about you, or believing the horrible thing?

And where does your natural self worth lean you in situations like that?

Usually, I don't care. If its from a friend and is meant as constructive criticism, I will listen, but I feel free to disregard it.

 

[watergirl]

I tend to believe the positives.

How many people actual get criticized to their face all that often?

Do you like yourself? Do you think the negative accusations are true? Do the opinions of others shape your sense of self?

I rarely get criticized to my face. I say "thank you" to compliments. Sometimes the compliments astound me, because I think what I have done (in terms of work) is unremarkable and just what I should be doing... and it still impresses people. I should be grateful, I guess!

 

[cybergirly]

The bad is easier to believe, but I've come to accept the good as well.

At some point I realized that all of the compliments I give out are meant, so why shouldn't at least most of the ones I receive be meant as well.