Where were you

[Kajira Callista]

on Sept. 11th. 2001?
How did you find out about the attack?
What were your feelings that day?

 

[Evil_Geoff]

I was at home, the phone rang and I was told by a friend that a plane had struck the first tower at the World Trade Center. I was watching the news when the second plane struck, when the Pentagon was attacked, and when Towers came down.

Shock, disbelief, anger, frustration, sorrow, powerlessness.

There was nothing I could do, nothing at all, except sit and watch the events as they unfolded. God help me, but I wanted to strike back, to lash out, blindly, indiscrimately. I was fueled by a rage and hatred that I had never truly believed I was capable of. I would have gladly turned the entire middle east into a green glass covered parking lot. Fortunately for the world, _I_ was not holding the keys to the largest nuclear arsenal in the history of the planet.

Today I am sad. The rage flared hotter than I would have ever thought, but it burned only briefly. I realize that the vast majority of the people of the Middle East want pretty much the same things _I_ do... a roof over the head, food in the belly, clothes on our backs, a decent job, a future for our children, a safe place for our families... We have a lot in common, if only we look for it.

There's a knot in my throat, I'm fighting back tears. Dayum, who would think I'd still hurt after 5 years?

 

[Shankara20]

I was living in California at the time. As the news broke I was setting on the side of my bed trying to decide if I could go to work that morning. I had not yet been to sleep from the night before. Ma'am had had a total emotional breakdown September 10th and I had spent the day and night getting her into psyche emergency as a suicide prevention measure.

Setting there with the morning TV news on it took some time for the significance of the story to impact me. I was already numb. I just sat there and watched the horror unfold. I gathered enough presence of mind to call my boss and tell him I was not going to come to work that day. I can still see the images that kept coming all day from my TV in my minds eye, but all I remember about my feelings of that day was being numb.

Ma'an is now stable and living in California, I'm living in Kansas.

 

[kajiraahava]

That was an awful day, much of it remains foggy to me. I had been in a case review conference with colleagues. For some unknown reason, an employee came in and relayed to us that a bomb had gone off, or some other mistaken interpretation.

The consensus was to continue our review. However, my interest was elsewhere, so I excused myself to my office and turned on the television. Watching the events unfold, I sat alone with my thoughts.

There were many tears, much confusion, frustration, and more. Some of my thoughts were, perhaps, selfish - realizing some acquaintances were likely affected. It was later on that it "hit me", there were Mothers, Fathers, Brothers, Sisters, etc involved. What right did I have to compare my loss with those who had a much closer connection.

Although it wasn't asked, I have spent quite a bit of time there since. My Christmas was spent in Manhattan, immortalized by pictures and video. The site, feeling, and images of trucks lined up to remove the "debris" have been burned into my thoughts. It left me in awe - the massive damage, numbers of those suffering, etc. for which I could go on forever.

The following Independence Day was spent in Manhattan as well. I cannot go through further detail, but there was a sense of community at that time - for no person felt alone. All lives were touched from living through the experience.

Tears are streaming down my cheeks and I write through the vision of teary eyes. This is something that will never be forgotten - nor should it be. Those who lost their lives in each plane that was crashed, and each office that crumbled should be remembered always. Please excuse my ramblings, this is not an event that could ever be recounted in a sensible manner, speaking personally.

 

[CutieMouse]

Shank, I'm so very sorry for the double hit you took that day. I've dealt with similar issues, and "numb" just doesn't begin to cover it.

I was getting breakfast for the kids, and my ex called on his way into work- telling me to turn on NBC.

I remember spending the next few hours begging him to come home... his offices were in the Dallas World Trade Center, at the time. Every business in the tower sent employees home, except for his.

I remember how frightening it felt to realize there were no airplanes in the sky. None. You couldn't hear a jet engine to save your life, and the silence felt so ominous.

It was so surreal to hear the children in the playroom, and seeing the events unfolding on TV. My oldest was a baby when the Oklahoma Bombing happened; my 4th was a baby when the towers fell... sigh.

 

[myinnerslut]

i was watching it happen on tv and saw my father, an EMT, running towards the towers before the video camera fell and smashed. i was so scared.

 

[agibean]

Five years ago

My Husband and I were getting ready for work, and he told me to turn the TV on-he had been listening to the radio. I turned it on in time to see the 2nd plane hit.

I was working for a small weekly newspaper at the time, so of course I spent the day at work, calling for reactions and in between, watching the story unfold on television. I was shocked and saddened-my mother's family is from NYC, so it was very personal to me.

There were no planes, of course-we live on the flightpath from the airport, so it was very strange. And we get around the city mostly by bus-that was the other odd thing. No one spoke, all day. It was like the busses were some kind of odd cone of silence-usually you have at least one or two loud teengers or transient, but not that day.

My oldest child was 16 and away at boarding school, and I tried calling him all day, for some reason that was very important to me. I was just beside myself that I could not reach him. I finally did late that day.

A few months later, I was fortunate to meet a female police officer from NYC who worked at Ground Zero that day. Her story was terrifying and humbling. I don't think a one of us who wasn't there can begin to imagine what it was like for those who were.

Every year on this day, though I am not religious, I say a little prayer for everyone who was killed or involved in the efforts to try and save people that day.

 

[callinectes]

I was walking down the hall in my office when I just happened to look in a friend's office and saw the look on her face. She said the Twin Towers had been struck by an airplane. I thought she meant the twin buildings that houses most of the GA state government in Atlanta. It wasn't until I got back to my office and slipped on the radio that I learned the awful truth. We all just gathered around the radios and cried.

I remember going home and cooking dinner and as my family sat around the table I looked at my three year daughter and burst into tears. All I could think about was the babies who would not be sitting at the dinner table with their parents that night, or any other night.

Myinnerslut - I can't imagine what it was like to see your father in the midst of all of that. It made my heart stop just to read about you seeing him.

I don't know what it was like in the rest of the country, but my little town virtually shut down until the following week. No one went shopping, the streets were empty in the evenings, everyone was at home. It was such an odd feeling.

 

[the captians wench]

I was working at my aunt's sewing shop, buzzing away making what we called tails for harley davidson head wraps. We always had a radio playing, and it was always on an am station for some reason. I didn't know why, but it was their rutine so I just adapted it. The radio was loud enough that we could hear it over the buzz of four machines. When the anouncement came on that the first tower was hit, every machine stopped. It didn't take long for my aunt to pull out a little travel tv for us, and so we all watched as the second one hit. I was totally paralized. I was 18 and still trying to figure out who I am, trying to deal with the fact that my step dad was not going to live much longer, and at that moment, trying to comprehend the fact that there were thousands in that building.

My aunt offered to take anyone that wanted to go to church with her for lunch break as they had an open prayer room. I went with her and one of the secretaries. I remember seeing all the people in suits come and go like there was a revolving door. I said my prayers like a good girl does "Father watch over those who have been touched by this tragidy. Give strength and guidence to those who have lost loved ones. Bless our president, and give him your touch and guidence as he leads this country. Bless those who have crossed over and welcome them." The words came blankly like a little child saying their prayers that they've been told to say every night. And as that realization hit me, I broke down into tears. I wasn't exactly sure why, but all of a sudden I felt very scared, and very alone. As I sat there head bowd, tears pouring down my face, eyes sealed shut; I felt a hand touch my shoulder. Just a light touch, for about a minute, and then it was all gone. The tears slowed, and I felt okay again. I looked up and around to see who it was that had touched me, but no one let on, and there were just so many people walking around that I couldn't figure it out.

At that point I looked up and over at my aunt, and then over the other side of the room at the other girl, gave each a nod and we walked out of the room. We still hadn't eaten at that point so we stopped over at the Mcdonald's across the street. I remember sitting there and talking about what we thought about the events but I don't remember what we said. It's so funny because that empty prayer I remember clear as day, as well as every thing else that was said, except at that table.

We ended up back at the shop some time close to 2, which made for a 2 hour lunch break. So I stayed late to work. I'm not sure if I really did it to make up time, because my aunt offered to pay us both for the lost time, or if I was just avoiding going in the house, but I stayed, and I worked. past 5, past 6, past 7, it was going into 8pm when the night shift girl looked at me and said "hunny stop, go eat and go to bed". I looked up and just looked at her for a moment. I gave a nod went in the house, grabbed a sandwich and tucked myself into bed with the cat.

I remember it so clearly it feels like yesterday. Hard to believe it was 5 years ago.

 

[Kajira Callista]

I remember the day..it was sunny and chilly. The first sign of fall. I was home from dropping thing one at the bus and cleaning up thing 2s toys when my mother called.
She said something happened at the wtc and i should turn on the tv. In the background i heard my father talking...saying we are at war. His voice was eerily calm. I watched the second plane hit while i was on the phone with my mother and i could tell we were both figuring out where all our family was at the moment.
We got off the phone and calmly began to call people, never once did i take my eyes off the TV. There was no phone service, it didn't occur to us to try cells right away. I kept trying the lines. I was still calm and oddly focused.
It wasn't until the plane crashed in southern pa that i realized i needed to get thing 1. I felt panic striken all of a sudden and called the school and was told it was in lockdown... i think i said fuck that I'm coming for my child and the person on the phone said i couldn't and the state police were there and wouldn't even allow me to stop on the road by the school. Realization set in as i hung up the phone and it was a mix of rage, tears and frustration all at once. The bus got a police escort home and i think i nearly broke my babies ribs when i got him in my arms. I hated being so far from my family and cried like a baby every time one of them finally called.
Panic attacks, sleepless nights, constant news coverage and the horror stories heard from family and friends about what they saw as they were leaving other office buildings in the area followed for days after.
Just typing this gives me that same flip flop tummy feeling i had that day.

 

[Netzach]

I popped into a SM chat that AM. before work... I've often lived TV free. People were spouting all kinds of gibberish, someone was posting that she was so worried 'cause her nephew was in the coast guard, and I thought oh, it's some small-scale OK City right wing nutjob blew something up again...I clicked on NPR and I couldn't believe what I was hearing.

My boss was in Canada. I went to the gallery, opened, stood there looking at the rain coming down the picture window and listening to NPR all day. No one came in. I listened to the same loop of NPR coverage in disbelief for 8 hours. I stopped on my way home at the restraurant/bar nearby and ordered a pancake and a martini. The waiter said he didn't know how to be, I said to just be however he wanted to be, and we talked a little. I went home and listened to the same NPR loop all night.

I actually finally broke down and cried when they went to "Marketplace"

The commentator opened with a quote from St. Paul -
"I am a citizen of no mean city."

I am a citizen of no mean city, wherever I live, I am a New Yorker.

 

[FurryFury]

I was driving to work. I had the radio on the only station worth a damn that has since gone away. It tended to play metal music, was irreverent and had a lot less talk than most stations. Still morning is the time for talk. At first I turned it down when they started talking like I normally did when no music was playing that I liked. At that time I worked hourly wages at a library. I snapped off the engine and only vaguely heard something about planes and a building. I thought it was more radio talk jokes or some crap.

I clocked in and was walking through the circulation lobby which has a tv on ALL the freaking time in it when one of the ladies asked me if I had heard yet. I wasn't sure what she was talking about my eyes went to the tv to see the second tower being hit and I froze.

No one got any real work done that day. We were all in complete shock. I was totally numb. My husband was home asleep because he had night shift that night. I thought about going home. I thought what can he do? I'd rather he had enough sleep to avoid cutting a body part off tonight. (This is a common thing I think about. I tend to guard his sleep like a bull dog because of it.) Oh how I wanted to go home though. I wanted to get my kids from school and wake my husband and huddle hugging one another but that would be selfish. I didn't do that.

I picked up my kids from school as normal. I was shocked to learn the schools had been letting them watch that stuff all day. We had to have a talk about these things because of that, they were terrified. I had wondered how to break it to them. It wasn't an issue the school had already done that. It pissed me off but I guess they were all stunned they didn't think it through either?

At home we did hug and talk. My husband got up. I told him what had happened while tear fell from my eyes. He went to work anyway. As I expected he would but he was very upset. I found out later there was a bomb threat at his work that night. I had to be out at a business meeting that night. I felt terrible about it but it was necessary. I was happy I had a reliable sitter. It felt stupid to be trying to conduct business that night.

I was glad to get home to my kids. I was relieved when my husband was home safe from work that morning.

Fury

 

[DVS]

Just like when Kennedy was shot, we all remember where we were. I was watching the "Today" show, when they changed to a view of the WTC. They said a plane had just hit the first tower. While they were talking, the second plane hit.

I just couldn't believe it, when the towers collapsed. That was hard for my brain to compute. I didn't think that could happen. They said there were suppose to be about 10,000 people in the two towers, at that time of day. I thought sure I had just seen 10,000 people die. It was a small consolation when I heard all but about 3,000 got out alive.

My sub at the time called me. She said she had friends that worked in WTC #1 and couldn't reach them. I told her I'd heard there was no cell phone access there, because the local cell antenna was on top of one of those buildings. She later found out her friends weren't at work, that morning.

I have a friend that lives in Washington D.C. He sent me an email that his wife's sister had died in the Pentagon. It's kind of strange, but he grew up in the mid-west. His wife grew up in New Jersey. I'm assuming her sister did, too. They all moved to Washington D.C. about 10 years ago, to work for the government.

To this day, I was sure we were going to be going over to the mid-east and turn something into a parking lot. In the last five years, my opinion hasn't changed.

 

[Daddyslilpet]

I had sent my oldest two off to school and my husband and I were having coffee together before he had to go back to work. We were watching the news when the second plane hit the south tower. I was scared to death what this was going to mean for us, would they lock down the post (hubby is Army after all). My kids' schools were both off post in the local town. I wanted to jump in the car and go get them, but he said I should just let them stay at school until we knew more.

Then he rushed off to get ready to head back in to find out what was going to happen on post. That left me and our then 3 year old at home. I couldn't tear myself away from the tv.

My middle child (then in 5th grade) was basically clueless when he got home, but my high schooler had watched it all day which upset me. She was just about a nervous wreck from it too. I'm sure no one knew what to do.

I'll never forget how helpless I felt.

 

[lne_iii]

I was in either freshman or sophomore (high school) history class.

Turned on the tube and we actually watched the second plane hit.

It was horrifying of course.

Shock and Awe, indeed.

 

[Exogenous]

I was at work and went to the gym room where they had the TVs tuned into the news channels. I watched as the second plane hit. I felt stunned, numb, not believing it but seeing it. It seemed surreal. All I could think of was about the people who were effected by this tragedy; the people in the WTC towers, the emergency crews, the families of all those people.

I wanted to go to my daughter’s school, pick her up, and take her home. I wanted to see her and hold her and feel we were safe, together. When I called the school they said they were in lock-down mode. I called her father since he worked just up the street from the school but he said he’d called, too, and they weren’t letting anyone in or out. There wasn’t much done at my office all day as we were in shock and sadness.

Oddly enough, just the night before, I’d made plane reservations for my daughter and me for our first trip to NYC for the Breeder’s Cup Championships being held at Belmont that year. It takes place at the end of October. I felt scared about going. I even called the airline about canceling the flight. They said I could but I wanted to calm down and really think about it before I made a decision. After talking about it with my brother he told me that security would be so tight that now would be the safest time to travel. So we went ahead with our trip. And I’m glad that we did. Although it was disturbing to go through the airports seeing soldiers with rifles all over the place. It really hit me how very vulnerable we all are. It also made me think about people who live in countries that are rife with war and that this must be a little taste of how they live…soldiers and rifles all over the place, every day.

I rented a car and we drove across the Brooklyn Bridge and there was a huge American flag flying from a pole on top. That brought tears to my eyes. We drove to Battery Park and easily found a parking space on the street one block away. When we looked in the opposite direction from Battery Park there was Ground Zero. The tears welled up again. It had been walled in but we could see smoke rising and cranes working within the walls. We took a ferry ride, of course the Statue of Liberty was closed. It was so eerie, everyone was silent as we passed the buildings and looked back. We could see huge pieces of the WTC sticking out in places of the buildings that surrounded the area. Everyone was very solemn. Again, I could only think of all those whose lives had been so violently disrupted, the loss of so many loved ones.

Everyone we encountered was warm and friendly. One could feel the need for that compassionate connection and unity in the face of such tragedy. It was a moral support system among strangers, it was absolutely remarkable. Even at the track, the day of the Championships, they held a beautiful, moving ceremony, with police on horseback all lined up in front of the tote board. All the jockeys came out carrying American flags to stand in front of the policemen. The national anthem was sung and everyone around me had tears in their eyes. A police officer read a tribute to those who perished. American pride just radiated throughout the crowd. It was one of the most moving experiences of my life. I know it left an indelible impression on my daughter, as well.

I was born in Scotland and came to the US with my family when I was an infant. I became a US citizen when I was 14 yrs old. At the time it didn’t seem to be a big deal. But while in NYC and experiencing what I did, it really brought home what a privilege that was, to become a citizen. It’s a blessing and an honor.

 

[littlegirlslut]

I was in college. I was sitting in my "Controversies in World Politics" class. My professor was this wonderful, but strict man. NO CELL PHONES at all. He walked in and his started going off and then a buzz kind of went around the room. We all kind of looked at one another. The first thing he said to us that semester was - this is the only college topic you could be asked to lose your life over - when we found out he got a tear in his eye and said he hates when he's right and told us to go be with loved ones. At the time (currently live in Manhattan) I had tons of friends that I could not get in touch with - it was a completely surreal time.

It was my second year away from home and I felt completely lost. I went and spent the rest of the day trying to contact friends and family - not reaching some for almost a week.

 

[graceanne]

I was getting A ready for school. K called and told me that a plane had crashed into one of the twin towers. At that point we weren't sure of the specifics - I figured the pilot was drunk or something. I left shortly after to take A to school. The MAX (light rail) was deserted but for a couple of people. One of them was a lady who worked at the courthouse and had been sent home. She told me what was going on. I got off the MAX and took A home. I called my mom and she agreed to come pick me up. I was afraid their was going to be rioting and I wasn't living in the best area then. I packed everything I could fit into A's diaper bag, and met her down by Skidmore Fountain (she didn't want to get too far from L's school, in case they closed the school). It was also deserted (normally unheard of). I spent most the day watching the tv and crying.

 

[littlegirlslut]

Shock, disbelief, anger, frustration, sorrow, powerlessness.

There's a knot in my throat, I'm fighting back tears. Dayum, who would think I'd still hurt after 5 years?

I think this says it all. Although today I walked to work (an hour or so) because it was a lovely morning and I felt as though people were walking with more of a smile on their faces and their heads held high.

There is a sense of being ONE in this city. Which is well, a wonderful thing. We had a small ceremony at work - we were an emergency site when the towers fell. Just a ring of silent thought.

 

[Xelebes]

I was chillin' out, breezin' and shit
When I heard buncha those idiot
Came across in a big ol' jet
Twiggin' up the ol' house of bets
Came a-crashing and shit I gave not
I was maxing out on meth and pot
Wasted on the bed of fuckin' thorns
Hearing forsome reason damn'd car horns!
I skeeted to the washroom and took a shat
Ran to a closet with my tin-foil hat
And have been hiding since with the internet
Waiting for this shit not to be shat yet.

 

[kitty4ever]

It was a beautiful day, and I was already at work, working on the monthly journal entries due in the general ledger that day. I don't have the radio on or anything at work, and those that do are encouraged to keep it quiet so it is basically just heard in your cube.

Anyways, my sister called me and in a somewhat panicked voice said a plane had hit the WTC. I thought she was kidding, and told her so. She's like no, she's in her car and listening on her radio and heard the disc jockeys' reaction to hearing the second plane hit.

I sat there, feeling numb, and she asks if I can get on the CNN website to see if it was true. I vaguely remember hearing more talking than usual, so I'm sure the reaction was going around the office. I brought up a web browser, but the CNN website was of course, so flooded that it wouldn't come up. She said she'd call me back later, and we got on the phone.

I stood up and saw people all standing around a nearby desk that did have a radio. We didn't have a TV in the building, so I luckily never saw the horrors live on TV. I heard others reactions, and I felt numb, so numb. I spent part of that morning on the phone with my mother and sister, and we all made plans to meet and Mom and Dad's house for lunch.

There was a lot of worry on hearing that the Pentagon was hit until we got ahold of my sister-in-law in Hawaii to make sure my brother wasn't there. That's when she told us that it was the Naval Intelligence dept that was hit. He might not have been there, but he did lose a lot of co-workers and friends.

My sister, mother and I watched the replays at lunch, and they showed it over and over. We've always been a close family, but this made us even closer. I didn't cry though until about I don't know how many months later. I was watching that (I think it was HBO) documentary on it, and started bawling.

This fifth anniversary snuck up on me. I didn't realize until yesterday when I realized it was the 10th. Nowadays, I rarely watch TV, and haven't really felt like listening to the radio all that much in the past week or so. My heart still goes out to the families and friends left behind.

 

[His_pita]

I was living in Orlando, Florida and was sitting on my bed watching the last of Good Morning America when they started talking about a plane hitting one of the towers. My ex called at that time and I sat telling him about it. It didn't dawn on me at the time just how big that hole was in that building. I saw the second plane hit and my ex said this is war. I was devastated and felt so helpless. All I could do was watch the coverage and pray for all those poor people and their grieving friends and families.

I haven't watched any coverage today. We purposely went out and stayed busy so I wouldn't be home. Otherwise I would have sat and relived it all again. I still thought about it much of the day however.

 

[graceanne]

There's a knot in my throat, I'm fighting back tears. Dayum, who would think I'd still hurt after 5 years?

I've cried three times today. I'm beginning to wonder when I'll heal. If I'll ever be able to think about 9/11 without crying.

 

[ammre]

I was between class when an announcement was to go to the chapel. Went, was told about the first plane hititng the tower. The chapel was brief, any girls who's parents worked in the towers was excused to go to the nurses office to use the phone and make sure their parents were ok (there's a sort of lounge waiting space there) About 30 girls left (there was only 350 in the school). I was on my way to gym. I noticed a small flock of girls on the stairs loking at the skyline and you could ee the smoke, then i saw the second blast. My entire gym class sat outside watching as they fellt. it looked like someone had poured water on a tall narrow sandcastle. About a minute later someone came outside to tell us the towers had fallen and we couly only point at the smoke billowing up.


My friend finally put up her account of the day. She's in the air force and two days after it happened she was sent in. This was the first time i ever heard what happened by her.

I like to not think about it.

 

[GoddessHathor]

I was at work. Just settled down in my office after getting coffee when a co-worker came in and stuck his head in my office asking if I'd heard about the plane crash. He was Russian and very hard to understand, so I didn't get it right away, then figured it was just a plane crash and that I'd read about it at lunch.

But then I noticed that no one was doing anything. The phones weren't ringing, no emails, no hallway gossip...it was eerily quiet. I then checked the internet for news and saw what was happening. The CEO wouldn't let us leave the building until he knew that it was safe (not that terrorists would go after the small town the office was in), but he put the phones on closed and set up a TV in one of the conference rooms, then led a prayer session for those killed.

My first thoughts were of my daughter, who was in pre-school 45 minutes away. I immediately called my then husband and told him to go get her ASAP.

Second thoughts were of my technicians who were stationed all over the country doing on-site installs. I wasn't worried for their safety, as they were all on the ground and working in 9-1-1 centers...but I wanted to get them home to their families...and I couldn't. I called each wife with an apology for not being able to get them home fast enough. One of my guys was stuck for two weeks.

I later found out that two of my friends were killed that day. Two that I never would have suspected of being anywhere near there. One was there on business, the other visiting a friend. Both are greatly missed.

My daughter, now 10, remembers that day as well, which is surprising. She said she remembers sitting in front of the TV with me that night, watching. She doesn't remember what she was watching, but she remembers me squeezing her really tight and crying (which I never do) and that alone scared her enough that she still remembers it.