Where are the happy, chill lesbians?

[TheLobster]

I doubt it is your intent, but your posts on this thread seem to be increasingly hostile toward lesbians, and virtually pathologizing those who write lesbian fiction. Perhaps you should reconsider how you address these issues if you want your points to be considered.

If you doubt that was @Kelliezgirl ’s intent but also remark how her posts seem to be to you, then perhaps it is in fact your attitude that needs adjusting.

Pick up those eggshells instead of forcing us to walk on them.

 

[MelissaBaby]

If you doubt that was @Kelliezgirl ’s intent but also remark how her posts seem to be to you, then perhaps it is in fact your attitude that needs adjusting.

Pick up those eggshells instead of forcing us to walk on them.

I write what I mean and I mean what I write. I have always thought Kellieagirl was a reasonable, thoughtful poster and that she has made defensive posts that are distorting her actual intent.

No one is forcing you to do anything.

 

[AwkwardlySet]

Sigh.

I'm giving a five-star rating to five stories of your choice to whoever sticks to the topic.

 

[AwkwardMD]

Sigh.

I'm giving a five-star rating to five stories of your choice to whoever sticks to the topic.

Maybe the better question is, of all the sad lesbian authors, what is it about us that we then also seek community and fellowship here? LC was right. None of the chill ones are here.

Edit: am I answering my own question?

 

[PennyThompson]

Being fairly pansexual, I think I enjoy the more joyful "awakening," lesbian stories, where a woman discovers, either gradually or suddenly, that she's falling for another woman for the first time in her life.

When I was writing Vocational Awe (my only real pure lesbian story, so far) @THBGato advised me to lean into feelings of confusion and doubt and second-guessing.

I think I did that a little bit, but for me the feelings there are more excitement and curiosity... like exploring a new city and finding a new favorite food

 

[ShelbyDawn57]

Here, maybe...

 

[AwkwardMD]

Being fairly pansexual, I think I enjoy the more joyful "awakening," lesbian stories, where a woman discovers, either gradually or suddenly, that she's falling for another woman for the first time in her life.

When I was writing Vocational Awe (my only real pure lesbian story, so far) @THBGato advised me to lean into feelings of confusion and doubt and second-guessing.

I think I did that a little bit, but for me the feelings there are more excitement and curiosity... like exploring a new city and finding a new favorite food

Love that for you

 

[Five_Inch_Heels]

Sigh.

I'm giving a five-star rating to five stories of your choice to whoever sticks to the topic.

Which topic?

 

[AwkwardlySet]

Maybe the better question is, of all the sad lesbian authors, what is it about us that we then also seek community and fellowship here? LC was right. None of the chill ones are here.

Edit: am I answering my own question?

That might be true for more than just the lesbians here.

Anyway, after a very long hiatus, I started writing again. It's gonna be a story in this very category, and one about happy and sexy lesbians pursuing love and sex, tinged with gentle d/s themes. There's a love triangle of a sort, there's drama, but also plenty of erotic buildup and sex. And I wonder how I would categorize it in the sense of this topic?
It's like a fifty-fifty in the sense of story vs stroke. There's angst and desire, but it's mostly positively nuanced.

That's one more thing that I realized. While I can certainly appreciate stories about sadness and loss, especially those that progress into something more positive, I find that such stories are a murder for my erotic tendencies. For me, sadness and loss don't mix at all with arousal and sex.

Is that weird?

 

[Five_Inch_Heels]

It's gonna be a story in this very category, and one about happy and sexy lesbians pursuing love and sex, tinged with gentle d/s themes. There's a love triangle of a sort, there's drama, but also plenty of erotic buildup and sex. And I wonder how I would categorize it in the sense of this topic?
It's like a fifty-fifty in the sense of story vs stroke. There's angst and desire, but it's mostly positively nuanced.

You could pick up on Heidi and Thea.

Highly successful at business, so much so that they don't have enough time for each other. Insanely attractive and wildly into each other. They make the best of what little time they get, but also 'stray' a bit with full knowledge and consent of the other. In some cases, they even share the third.

I got crap for the third having a dick, but you could take it different way.

 

[AwkwardlySet]

You could pick up on Heidi and Thea.

I assume that's one of your stories?
Anyway, trust me, I don't lack for ideas. There are like ten long stories in my head still waiting to be given life. And I'm already 10k words into the story, which for me is usually just the beginning.

But thanks for the offer, though. And maybe repost that story, this time without fussing about readers' comments.

 

[AwkwardMD]

That might be true for more than just the lesbians here.

Anyway, after a very long hiatus, I started writing again. It's gonna be a story in this very category, and one about happy and sexy lesbians pursuing love and sex, tinged with gentle d/s themes. There's a love triangle of a sort, there's drama, but also plenty of erotic buildup and sex. And I wonder how I would categorize it in the sense of this topic?
It's like a fifty-fifty in the sense of story vs stroke. There's angst and desire, but it's mostly positively nuanced.

That's one more thing that I realized. While I can certainly appreciate stories about sadness and loss, especially those that progress into something more positive, I find that such stories are a murder for my erotic tendencies. For me, sadness and loss don't mix at all with arousal and sex.

Is that weird?

Good for you for writing again.

 

[Five_Inch_Heels]

Oh well.

 

[JordynRose]

It was just an observation, and I understand the question.

I think I am happy, and laid back.

Hoping everyone a beautiful day.

 

[Euphony]

One thing I couldn't tell from Carroll's paper is whether these studies considered confounding factors.

For instance, poverty is associated with a significant increase in DV rates - rich people aren't necessarily nicer, but people with more money have more options for getting out of bad situations. Queer people tend to have higher rates of poverty than the general population (in particular bi women and trans people generally), so one would expect to see somewhat higher rates of DV in those groups; the question would then be are they higher than normal for straight/cis couples in similar economic situations?

Yeah, there are plenty of nebulous areas seemingly unconsidered by the study (linked) most of those articles seem to be relying on. Affluence levels relative to a demographic certainly seems like it would factor.

Also, men seem more unlikely to report (given the societal pressures/weird "ideal masculinity" going around) So it's not that lesbian partners experience more violence, they feel safer in reporting it, less fear of social consequences for doing so, and less hit to the ego.

So far the data seems more pop science to draw conclusions from than is good practice.

 

[Euphony]

Don't mind me, I've had a crush on Shirley for a long long time and this song just fit the thread... And makes me happy.

Shirley and co. are top tier from that era. Always felt they never got their due but also didn't feel like they were chasing it either.

Sure I'm speaking to the choir but Garbage's B-sides (not just the collection album but international singles and beyond) are EXCEPTIONAL.

The albums proper are great but so many of the singles elevate even beyond the bangers on even self titled or 2.0 peak.

I honestly think they didn't get hassled by the A&R suits as much with the small stuff which allowed them to experiment.

And Garbage really shines when they Push It (the envelop.)

Their singles catalog is maybe the best I know.

 

[EmilyMiller]

So far the data seems more pop science to draw conclusions from than is good practice.

To anyone with a background in publishing in top tier peer-reviewed journals in an at least semi-numerate field, these papers are a house of cards based on meta analyses of data,which was often collected for a different purpose, or via unpublished questions with who knows what bias. The methodologies that I can discern seem flawed, and the data volumes low. And, to borrow a phrase, there is more than one review paper with an agenda forward perspective.

I’m not going to comment on them any more as I don’t think they merit any further comment. People will believe whatever they want to believe. But science is not about belief.