When you have sex or in a bdsm situation

[ttvttp]

How much of a deal is your partners hygiene. And I dont mean the normal parts like armpits. I mean the smell of their butt and the smell of either their vagina or their balls and penis? Does it have to smell really good for you to whip them or is it not a big deal?

 

[rosco rathbone]

I have no sense of smell due to industrial accidents, but their visual presentation of cleanliness is about averagely important in my case, I'd say.

 

[EmpressFi]

I would think you wouldnt want to be around anyone who smells offensively.. however, what would the smell of their balls or vagina have to do with whipping them? I'm just curious

ETA: Sex yes.. was just curious about the whipping. I dont know too many people with their noses close to asses/pussies while whipping..and if someone's body odor was strong enough to be detected by someone standing far enough away to be whipping... YEESH yeah.. send them to the showers

 

[ttvttp]

Something to coincide with bdsm.

 

[HottieMama]

Wrong "side of the whip" for me, but my partner's hygeine is VERY important. Like PARAMOUNT.

 

[Melodiosa]

Hygiene is very important. I make sure to keep myself clean, and I expect the same from my partner.

 

[YourCaptor]

First thing, they got to be clean as can be. However I don’t really consider those smells you mentioned as hygiene issues, but more as just the natural smell. You could perfume over them if you wanted, but personally I thing that would be far worse.

When I’m in the mood, the smell can actually works as an aphrodisiac. My x actually loved wearing my jackets, and snuggling with other things of mine because she said the smell relaxed her.

It might help to try and approach it without the pre conceived notion that it will be bad, once you catch those pheromones you will love it.

Which brings up another interesting subject. While one person my stink to you, to another they wont smell at all. It has something to do with the immune system or something.

 

[satindesire]

First thing, they got to be clean as can be. However I don’t really consider those smells you mentioned as hygiene issues, but more as just the natural smell. You could perfume over them if you wanted, but personally I thing that would be far worse.

When I’m in the mood, the smell can actually works as an aphrodisiac. My x actually loved wearing my jackets, and snuggling with other things of mine because she said the smell relaxed her.

It might help to try and approach it without the pre conceived notion that it will be bad, once you catch those pheromones you will love it.

Which brings up another interesting subject. While one person my stink to you, to another they wont smell at all. It has something to do with the immune system or something.

I like to sleep on my Sir's pillow sometimes. Sometimes when I miss him while he's at work, I go into the bathroom and spray a little bit of his cologne in the air so I can smell him.

Pheromones are linked to the immune system, so you're absolutely right. ^_^

I have very good hygiene and I expect my partner to be the same. Being a sub, I've never whipped anyone, but if I was a Dom, showers before a scene would be VERY important.

I think warm skin fresh from exfoliating in a shower would be more sensitive, wouldn't it? Muahahaha!!!

 

[Chicklet]

BDSM or not, I won't be playing with a smelly partner...

 

[_kiana_]

I agree. Hygiene is very important. But I don't always need a perfectly "just out of the shower" scent to be able to do things. As long as the strength of the scent doesn't make me wrinkle my nose it's all good.

Certain scents drive me absolutely nuts. But I usually don't notice that happening with a partner until I've been with them for a bit. My husband after sweating just slightly gets me instantly horny. And something similar has happened with my regular play partner as well.

I always try to be as clean as possible when I know I'll be playing, too.

 

[DeservingBitch]

Am I the only one here who's never had a 'bad hygiene' experience? I always wonder why people put so much emphasis on 'good hygiene' and cleanliness. Is it because you had partners who had bad hygiene?

Because for me, good hygiene when talking about an adult human being is something expected, a basic, not worth mentioning. Like not spitting at the dinner table. I don't expect to have to mention that, and should I have a date with someone who would spit at the dinner table, I would see it as an exception and wouldn't find it necessary in the future to mention in a personal ad that I am looking for someone with good hygiene and who doesn't spit at the dinner table.

So yeah, why all this talk about good hygiene? Where are those adults that don't have good hygiene? Am I the only one who's never dated one of them?

 

[EmpressFi]

Am I the only one here who's never had a 'bad hygiene' experience? I always wonder why people put so much emphasis on 'good hygiene' and cleanliness. Is it because you had partners who had bad hygiene?

Because for me, good hygiene when talking about an adult human being is something expected, a basic, not worth mentioning. Like not spitting at the dinner table. I don't expect to have to mention that, and should I have a date with someone who would spit at the dinner table, I would see it as an exception and wouldn't find it necessary in the future to mention in a personal ad that I am looking for someone with good hygiene and who doesn't spit at the dinner table.

So yeah, why all this talk about good hygiene? Where are those adults that don't have good hygiene? Am I the only one who's never dated one of them?

*nods* I agree... I guess that's why I was kind of confused.

 

[WriterDom]

If I had a choice I wouldn't be around any stinky people. Much less dirty up my toys on their shit crusted buttocks.

 

[@}-}rebecca----]

omg what are we talking about here, straight in from gardening, running etc or jarlsburg storage in the navel.

Actually, I don't want to know........

 

[Chicklet]

So yeah, why all this talk about good hygiene? Where are those adults that don't have good hygiene? Am I the only one who's never dated one of them?

I've dated plenty of people who would come home and bang me after a physical activity and had that good, delicious sweaty smell of just having worked out or been active... THAT is wonderful.

But, I've had the misfortune of being AROUND people with hygiene that made my nostrils flare and my lips curl. Men who have breath so foul that when they get within a few feet of you, you can't breathe anymore... that disgusting, foul, STALE sweat smell... ugh. I can only *imagine* what they smelled like between their legs.

It's sort of apparent to me when someone has poor hygiene, and the very idea of being close to their genitals makes my stomach churn.

 

[YourCaptor]

omg what are we talking about here, straight in from gardening, running etc or jarlsburg storage in the navel.

Actually, I don't want to know........

I thought we where talking about odors not typically associated with being sweet.

 

[@}-}rebecca----]

I thought we where talking about odors not typically associated with being sweet.

Please feel free to consider me traumatized from the opening post

 

[FurryFury]

How much of a deal is your partners hygiene. And I dont mean the normal parts like armpits. I mean the smell of their butt and the smell of either their vagina or their balls and penis? Does it have to smell really good for you to whip them or is it not a big deal?

It depends a lot on how satisfied I am already. Did we eat and drink some of the same things beforehand, matters as well.

People don't have to be perfectly clean but it helps if I don't have to consciously ignore an unpleasant smell.

 

[marieR19]

DB- I think you'd be suprised. I haven't had any personal experience with a partner's bad odor, but I have had experience with knowing people with bad odor... And in at least three cases, it wasn't laziness or anything, they honestly didn't realize that they smelled bad, didn't realize that they needed to be more cautious about their hygiene.
(...... And yes, one of the "they"s in there was me.....)


Heather

 

[twysted73]

Let's differentiate, shall we?

** coughs*
~ What I percieve this thread to mean goes thusly:
He wants to know if whipping his subbie for being stinky is bad or good.
And this is where his vague definition of "stink" is throwing us all.
So here is how you "cut through the fog" of personal hygine issues.

Simply do what I would do. "WWTD?" (What Would Twysted Do?) Much like what would jesus do but I can only turn wine into urine so that knocks out that level of comperable talent.
But I digress.

When you are in scene, safe words asside, you're running the show my friend. So lay down a new law & kill two birds with one stone here.
She wishes to meet and (if possible) exceed your expectations thus earning her your praise and something delightful from your reward system.
So you set a bar for her and this will side step any embarrassment or self-consciousness issues that would normally arise when one person who is deeply effected by the other's words (due to such a close bond as this) is told that they don't smell good.

*** that kind of mental scar can be a part of MANY an argument for YEARS to come so let's avoid that particular land mine shall we? I think "do these jeans make me look fat" is enough for any relationship thank you.***

The Introduction!:
Tell her, "kitten, (yes, this is what I would name my submissive) we have something new for you to do when we are in scene." (hand her the list you completed prior to this conversation)
"This is a list, step by step, of what I expect of you in preperation before every scene. On it you will find detailed instructions as to what I will look for on a basic level. It is subject to alteration at a later time but for now this is all I ask of you. Once completed, return to me and I will then inspect you to ensure you followed my directions properly."

See, since you went and did all that homework by watching dog and equine breeding shows you know just how to lift, poke, prod and otherwise inspect you little submissive. And if she didn't scrub as well as you'd hoped, she gets a "point deduction" which will be used later in the form of orgasm control, situational bondage, denial of penis, the list goes on.

Now....if she has shaved, scrubbed and such and her natural scent STILL turns you off then that's nothing she can help. Oh I'm sure you can have her use scented sanitary towelettes back there or perhaps scented enemas, etc. But man, if a woman's natural scent, pheramones and sweat doesn't turn you on....well, I won't judge. I'll just say you can change the smell of those areas if needed.
Or as Fury suggested, a diet change (red meat and candies/junk food really mess with your natural scent) might be in order.
And it would all be done under the banner of you caring for her, etc.

Just realize that there MUSt be a point where you are satisfied with her efforts. She must be shown there IS an attainable level there. A carrot on a stick will get your ass only so far.
(see the double meaning there?)

Best of luck to you.

Oh, and if I were you? The rounded end of a flogger handle OR (my personal favorite) a riding crop (for lifting, manipulating a possition or stance) does quite well to add to the inspection.

Slante`

 

[FurryFury]

Oh wait, whipping is supposed to be a bad thing?

Crap.

 

[twysted73]

Oh wait, whipping is supposed to be a bad thing?

Crap.

HA!!! STOP reading my MIND!

*grits teeth and exhales*

*shivers too *

 

[FurryFury]

*chuckles*

 

[Homburg]

Can;t say as how I've been with anyone that had hygiene issues. I have been in situation where a person's natural scent did not agree with me. It wasn't and unclean smell, it was just the wrong sort of smell for me.

That said, the good sweat thing a plus. When there is someone whose smell agrees with me, fresh sweat from physical acitivity just intensifies that smell.

Oddly, while I don't particularly have a sensitive nose, scent is extremely important to me.

 

[Netzach]

Am I the only one here who's never had a 'bad hygiene' experience? I always wonder why people put so much emphasis on 'good hygiene' and cleanliness. Is it because you had partners who had bad hygiene?

Because for me, good hygiene when talking about an adult human being is something expected, a basic, not worth mentioning. Like not spitting at the dinner table. I don't expect to have to mention that, and should I have a date with someone who would spit at the dinner table, I would see it as an exception and wouldn't find it necessary in the future to mention in a personal ad that I am looking for someone with good hygiene and who doesn't spit at the dinner table.

So yeah, why all this talk about good hygiene? Where are those adults that don't have good hygiene? Am I the only one who's never dated one of them?

I too have not had a run in with this. I mean as you get to know someone better you MAY see them someday less washed, but I'm assuming we're talking about normal existence and dating stages. By the third year together, you don't care so much, but I did pick someone who is in favor of bathing daily.

Of course my husband does smell astoundingly like a girl. And yes, I know the distinction well.