When writers get sloppy

[3113]

The "What makes you stop" thread--about what makes a reader (namely us picky writer/readers) stop reading a story--was getting a little long. Rather than extend it with my question, I thought I'd better start up a new thread.

One point in the "stop" thread kept coming up and grabbing my attention: sloppiness. Sloppiness in punctuation, spelling, grammar, certainly. But, most especially, sloppiness in knowing the subject. Like writing a sex scene when it's clear ones never participated in that kind of sex. Or, as a.b. guye pointed out:

4) a complete lack of knowledge of the subject matter, specifically a genre (example: having a wiccan character and not knowing a thing about wicca)

So, now I'm curious. What was one of the most ergrarious errors (lack of knowledge) in a story that you ever found annoying or laughable or just exasperating? Either on-line or in a book? Including common errors that a lot of writers seem to make, pointing to laziness/sloppiness.

 

[BlackShanglan]

An author who repeatedly referrred to "generically" modified food and stated such crops were safer than the ordinary sort of food because they were grown in nice clean laboratories and not out in the nasty dirt.

Good lord, where could one begin?

 

[minsue]

An author who repeatedly referrred to "generically" modified food and stated such crops were safer than the ordinary sort of food because they were grown in nice clean laboratories and not out in the nasty dirt.

Good lord, where could one begin?

*snicker*

 

[minsue]

Story involving anal sex that seemed a bit confused about exactly where a woman will lubricate when aroused.

 

[3113]

An author who repeatedly referrred to "generically" modified food and stated such crops were safer than the ordinary sort of food because they were grown in nice clean laboratories and not out in the nasty dirt.

Good lord, where could one begin?

ROFLMAO. Okay. That's going to have me laughing all day long....

 

[BlackShanglan]

ROFLMAO. Okay. That's going to have me laughing all day long....

My work here is done.

 

[Stella_Omega]

An anal scene where the guy switches FROM her ass TO her pussy

Oh gawd the horror!

or the gigabytes of "slash" being written where an ass-fucking seems to need only "He relaxed his muscles" and lube is never mentioned...

The horror! The horror!

*collapses, sobbing, to the carpet*

 

[sophia jane]

An anal scene where the guy switches FROM her ass TO her pussy

Oh gawd the horror!

or the gigabytes of "slash" being written where an ass-fucking seems to need only "He relaxed his muscles" and lube is never mentioned...

The horror! The horror!

*collapses, sobbing, to the carpet*

I forgot the lube in one of my early stories and my editor was NOT happy with me. For me, when it happened, it wasn't that I didn't know any better. It was more that I found the appication of lube to be totally un-sexy.

One of my pet peeves, I think, is writers of lesbian/gay stories who are obviously VERY straingt and have no clue about gay/lesbian relationships and sex.

 

[minsue]

An anal scene where the guy switches FROM her ass TO her pussy

Oh gawd the horror!

Eeeeeew!

or the gigabytes of "slash" being written where an ass-fucking seems to need only "He relaxed his muscles" and lube is never mentioned...

The horror! The horror!

*collapses, sobbing, to the carpet*

Same goes for fisting stories out there. No prep, no lube. OUCH!!

 

[Stella_Omega]

I forgot the lube in one of my early stories and my editor was NOT happy with me. For me, when it happened, it wasn't that I didn't know any better. It was more that I found the appication of lube to be totally un-sexy.

One of my pet peeves, I think, is writers of lesbian/gay stories who are obviously VERY straingt and have no clue about gay/lesbian relationships and sex.

Well, you listened to your editor, maybe? In the most recent instance a woman who posts at an amature site- this is the third time she's done this. She's so into the anal fantasy, and I can't tell if she has any practical experience at all. On that site there are three of us who've mentioned it to her- she gets pretty upset and makes the most grudging changes.

I've thought about inviting her to bed with me and my strapon so she can find out what it's actually like- but then I thought- Stella, don't go there

Same goes for fisting stories out there. No prep, no lube. OUCH!!

*bursts into tears once more*

I have to say, I haven't found many of those- the "slash" fad has domination over the imaginations of the teen girl writers, evidently.
When the female slash fad starts up... New and improved opportunities for misinformation, whahoo!

 

[Norajane]

The double-cock oral penetration always has me rolling my eyes. Yeah, that's right, she stuffed two 10 inch dicks as thick as your arm in her mouth at the same time.

 

[sophia jane]

I've thought about inviting her to bed with me and my strapon so she can find out what it's actually like- but then I thought- Stella, don't go there

Hey, um Stella, I need a lesson. So you can invite me, kay???

ETA: and yes, I listened to my editor.

 

[Stella_Omega]

Hey, um Stella, I need a lesson. So you can invite me, kay???

ETA: and yes, I listened to my editor.

For you, Sophie- I would be humbly proud, you know that

 

[Guest]

I was reading a murder mystery and there was one point where all the computer in a business were removed on Monday, not returned until Thursday but the author had someone sending an email from the business on Tuesday...that was just a little too sloppy for me to continue

 

[damppanties]

Yesterday, I opened a story that had Pakistani characters. The story is written by an author I admire. It is such a stereotypical, insulting piece of... *takes a deep breath* Everything, from the names to the religious orientation, the culture... everything was so wrong. I couldn't read the whole thing because I was too offended. I'll be writing to the author when I feel less angry about the whole thing. Let's see what happens.

 

[Selena_Kitt]

<<<<I forgot the lube in one of my early stories and my editor was NOT happy with me. For me, when it happened, it wasn't that I didn't know any better. It was more that I found the appication of lube to be totally un-sexy.>>>>


actually, I have had anal sex without using lube... and it didn't hurt... but it's probably not the norm...

 

[Stella_Omega]

<<<<I forgot the lube in one of my early stories and my editor was NOT happy with me. For me, when it happened, it wasn't that I didn't know any better. It was more that I found the appication of lube to be totally un-sexy.>>>>


actually, I have had anal sex without using lube... and it didn't hurt... but it's probably not the norm...

Well, me too- but he was uncircumised, and that makes some difference- but I'd take better care nowadays anyway It's very possible this particular author has, too. But she hasn't answered our (not only mine) objections. And it's the same one who wrote anal-to-vaginal...

 

[Guest]

<<<<I forgot the lube in one of my early stories and my editor was NOT happy with me. For me, when it happened, it wasn't that I didn't know any better. It was more that I found the appication of lube to be totally un-sexy.>>>>


actually, I have had anal sex without using lube... and it didn't hurt... but it's probably not the norm...

Certainly not for first time anal, as is so often badly described from newbie erotic writers.

But the rectum does produce a small amount of lubrication, and if necessary saliva can work quite well for the connoisseur.

Ahem.

Stella - are you all done crying? I'm becoming most concerned.

 

[TheEarl]

I actually have a couple of books which I bought from a second-hand bookstall for 20p each. I keep them around and reread them occasionally, just to make myself feel so much better about my chances of publication.

One of them's a common-or-garden horror story with the author trying really hard to be Steven King, but coming off more Point Horror. It has a virus in part of it and the chisel-jawed gritty detective hero is talking to a doctor about it. He asks, "Have you tried using antibiotics on it" and I thought that was going to be a nice bit of characterisation, that the silly policeman didn't know that antibiotics don't affect viruses.

Except the doctor then answers, "We've tried antibiotics, but none of them are working."

!!!!!!

The Earl

 

[minsue]

Yesterday, I opened a story that had Pakistani characters. The story is written by an author I admire. It is such a stereotypical, insulting piece of... *takes a deep breath* Everything, from the names to the religious orientation, the culture... everything was so wrong. I couldn't read the whole thing because I was too offended. I'll be writing to the author when I feel less angry about the whole thing. Let's see what happens.

I don't know that I've ever seen you angry, Dampy. Don't wait, write angry.

 

[damppanties]

I don't know that I've ever seen you angry, Dampy. Don't wait, write angry.

Author I admire... don't want to be bitchy.

And then, cool and polite is much more effective, imo.

 

[Stella_Omega]

Author I admire... don't want to be bitchy.

And then, cool and polite is much more effective, imo.

You are so right!

 

[JamesSD]

<<<<I forgot the lube in one of my early stories and my editor was NOT happy with me. For me, when it happened, it wasn't that I didn't know any better. It was more that I found the appication of lube to be totally un-sexy.>>>>


actually, I have had anal sex without using lube... and it didn't hurt... but it's probably not the norm...

From personal experience, I've gone from vaginal to anal without any additional lube besides those she produced. But my partner is pretty remarkable in her abilities to handle me that way.

 

[MzDeviancy]

Sloppiness

First off, I've had anal without lube, too. My first time was without it, and it hurt more because the idiot tried to just shove it in. The next time he worked it in slowly (again without lube) and I took it like a little soldier, and it was actually pretty good. I started bringing lube just to make it easier thereafter, but it can be done the first time sans lube without being excrutiating, if one or the other person knows what they're doing.

I just wanted to share one for sloppiness that my editor shared with me, because it made me just about pee myself laughing. He was e-mailed by someone asking him to edit their first story they'd just written. The premise was a brother-sister incest story: they both get plastic surgery, and haven't seen each other in years, then they meet at a family reunion and don't recognize each other so they have sex, not knowing they're brother and sister. It hurts the brain.

 

[BlackSnake]

I've read some really good stories on Lit. Not even the small stuff messes up a good story. I don't have A.D.D., so I'm not easily distracted, and I am a programmer, so most of the things that I read and write are incomplete sentences.

The things that make me stop reading have to do more with my personal taste then an assumption that the writer lack spelling and grammar skills.

Here are a few things I don’t care for:

2nd person (e.g., “You…”) - I don’t want to be apart of any story.

1st person – When it’s too unbelievable even for erotic fiction.

Puff and Fluff – A whole lot of words just to say that the writer is trying very hard to be impressive at the expensive of the story.

Absolute Correct – Everything is spelled correctly, but there’s no plot.

Horrible flow – Sentences nearly 100 words long, or sentences all about the same length. Bore me with mono-tone. Some stories have a mixture of sentence length, but with a rhythm that do not match the context.

Super Intelligent – Stories that are written obviously with the use of a thesaurus, because the words have more the two syllables, but they kill the natural flow of the spoken word.

When authors are trying so hard not to make spelling and/or grammar errors that they forget to find out what the elements of a story are.