What's too scary? What's not? And why?

[RavenSpirit2k4]

We were playing around in the Cafe and some of us dom/mes found ourselves on the too scary list. So let's explore this (yes, I know a lot of it was just kidding around, but I'm genuinely curious now). What toys/styles/etc. are too scary or intimidating? And why?

Come on, 'lil subbies, tell us dom/mes and switches all about it. We won't hurt you.

Much.

 

[Kajira Callista]

We were playing around in the Cafe and some of us dom/mes found ourselves on the too scary list. So let's explore this (yes, I know a lot of it was just kidding around, but I'm genuinely curious now). What toys/styles/etc. are too scary or intimidating? And why?

Come on, 'lil subbies, tell us dom/mes and switches all about it. We won't hurt you.

Much.

Hmmm, so if i said you were all very scary...everything about every one of you. would you all hurt me......much?

 

[Xelebes]

Hmmmmmm....

Right now, personally, I find whips and floggers to be intimidating by the sheer fact that I have no idea what they feel like. Rulers, belts, straps and even ruten (or bundles of sticks) are fine, but whips and floggers intimidate me.

Yep, you can say that again. I'm a noob.

 

[FungiUg]

Caning, blood play and public sex/scening are all too scary for me. And hey, I'm a Dom!

 

[meri-t]

I'm a complete total newbie.. everything scares me.

I've been lurking around a bit, and right now, I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed by most of this stuff. I know what seems like it'd be fun, but it also seems like I'm too afraid of anything to take a step in that direction.

 

[RavenSpirit2k4]

Re: Re: What's too scary? What's not? And why?

Hmmm, so if i said you were all very scary...everything about every one of you. would you all hurt me......much?

Maybe we can take turns.

 

[Kajira Callista]

Re: Re: Re: What's too scary? What's not? And why?

Maybe we can take turns.

meow

 

[RavenSpirit2k4]

Perhaps we should begin a new thread in the Cafe; what I'd like to do to Kajira.

 

[Kajira Callista]

Perhaps we should begin a new thread in the Cafe; what I'd like to do to Kajira.

purrrrs and swishes tail

 

[RavenSpirit2k4]

I'm a complete total newbie.. everything scares me.

I've been lurking around a bit, and right now, I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed by most of this stuff. I know what seems like it'd be fun, but it also seems like I'm too afraid of anything to take a step in that direction.

When I first got into all this I bottomed. I thought a flogger was going to hurt like hell. I remember bracing myself for the first blow... and then going "that was it?" It stung, but not much. It actually took several blows before it hurt even half as much as I thought it would. And better still, I found that tingly after burn you get as the sting fades. Mmmmm.

Moral of the story: Get/borrow one (whatever it is) and try it on yourself at least once. It may not be as bad as you thought.

 

[tythisredheadup]

I'm a complete total newbie.. everything scares me.

I've been lurking around a bit, and right now, I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed by most of this stuff. I know what seems like it'd be fun, but it also seems like I'm too afraid of anything to take a step in that direction.

Right with ya, Meri-t. Blood, rope breast binding, caning, those are things that definitely scare the hell out of me.

 

[Bandit58]

Right with ya, Meri-t. Blood, rope breast binding, caning, those are things that definitely scare the hell out of me.

Add ball gags to that list I don't know why but the thought of being gagged really scares me.

Though I was scared at the thought of being spanked, but when it happened I really enjoyed it......go figure

 

[shelleb4]

Perhaps we should begin a new thread in the Cafe; what I'd like to do to Kajira.

Well yes, what a marvelous idea, id of suggested it, but was too scared she'd say no? So, count me in for that.

Meantime: scary, lets see, tell you what, id rather go with :Il say organge for slow down a bit will ya?, and lets see how far i get.

I dont have a safe word? well that'd be scary!

 

[Decadent Switch]

Hello
This is a difficult question for me. Most of the stuff connected with BDSM provokes mild fear, but that's part of the attraction. As for really scary, though... I think I'm probably going to need to experience it to find out for sure.
I have always had this tendency to chase down and confront all the things that truly frighten me. You know that feeling when you get as close to the edge of a cliff as you dare?
There's a place I know - haven't been there since I was a little boy - called the Linn o' Dee. Now, maybe I'm exaggerating this in my memory, but I can't really tell. But that's the perfect "edge of cliff" kind of scenario. I remember standing on the bank - the very high bank - and looking down into the swirling water. More like standing a couple of feet back from the edge of the bank and peering over the edge towards what I could see of the swirling water. As I remember it... if you fell in there, you weren't getting back out again. Again, it could be my memory exaggerating the feeling.
And then there was a British TV show called "Hammer House of Horror". Every week, a new story - and one that would kick the arse off any episode of "The twilight zone" or "The outer limits". I'd watch it every week without fail and then spend the rest of the night terrified of the dark.
As for a BDSM scenario, though... Hmm... I can only guess at what would truly scare me.
Being tied to a chair would do it - if I was naked. One of the curses of having a penis is that we men get very defensive of them. We hunch to protect them in certain situations, we cover them with our hands, we're constantly poised to guard them from attack. So a truly scary BDSM experience - I imagine - would be if I was tied to a chair, where I could see anything that might happen to it and do nothing to protect it. And if I got an erection... well, that would make it even more vulnerable and an even more inviting target.
Seeing a domme with a strap-on dildo too, I suspect. Not knowing how far that particular scenario is going to go. Will it just involve some humiliation..? Or maybe some fucking..? Or maybe even some sucking..? Seeing it go on would be bad enough, I suspect. Seeing it get lubed up for action would probably be infinitely more frightening.
I suppose, though... that possibly the most frightening thing would be to just put myself in the hands of a domme for the first time. To be naked and vulnerable and at her mercy - and to know that she is truly going to enjoy herself.
Like I said, though, I really don't know. I'm far too inexperienced to know for sure. One day, however, I might just find out all of these things.
And then I might come back to this thread and update my response.
Graham

 

[AngelicAssassin]

Too scary ...

Hairy Larry(s).

 

[crazybbwgirl]

Too Scarey: Blood play, mummification

Not: Floggers, bound gagged and blindfolded

 

[Netzach]

Too scary - full weight trample with sharp metal stiletto heels.

Breathplay with compression

needle zippers




Call me a wuss.

 

[shy slave]

Too scary - full weight trample with sharp metal stiletto heels.

Breathplay with compression

needle zippers

Call me a wuss.

I hadn't even thought of these but can I add Netzach to Dom/Mes who scare me?

What terrifies me are blindfolds or masks. Whoever wears it. Even though I know it would be Him underneath I would probably wet myself (no that is NOT a good thing lol).

Have probably watched too many horrer movies as a child, hence the fear

Other stuff I am simply cautious of as oppose to terrified, but would not want breath play, blood play or scat.

What are needle zippers...they sound scary.

 

[shy slave]

Re: Too scary ...

Hairy Larry(s).

Who's Larry ?!

 

[RavenSpirit2k4]

Being tied to a chair would do it - if I was naked. One of the curses of having a penis is that we men get very defensive of them. We hunch to protect them in certain situations, we cover them with our hands, we're constantly poised to guard them from attack. So a truly scary BDSM experience - I imagine - would be if I was tied to a chair, where I could see anything that might happen to it and do nothing to protect it. And if I got an erection... well, that would make it even more vulnerable and an even more inviting target.
Seeing a domme with a strap-on dildo too, I suspect. Not knowing how far that particular scenario is going to go. Will it just involve some humiliation..? Or maybe some fucking..? Or maybe even some sucking..? Seeing it go on would be bad enough, I suspect. Seeing it get lubed up for action would probably be infinitely more frightening.
I suppose, though... that possibly the most frightening thing would be to just put myself in the hands of a domme for the first time. To be naked and vulnerable and at her mercy - and to know that she is truly going to enjoy herself.

~recovers~

Ahem.....

There are lots of things that are too scary for me to do as a domme. Playing without safewords, for example. I remember one story - it was only a story, I know - where the sub snapped his fingers, this being their safe word, because he couldn't breathe around the ball gag. The reason? The whipping brought him to tears and his sinuses clogged. It gave me just a bit of a chill because I probably wouldn't have thought of that. More than anything, I often feel that's what safe words are for, because the dom/me can't think of everything and isn't feeling what the sub is feeling, even if they've been through that form of play as a sub themselves.

Ball gags are ok, but I often prefer to use my panties to gag a sub, with the command not to spit them out. I feel it kind of personalizes it all.

Mummification - I'm a bit claustrophobic myself. Never want to experience this as a sub and don't want to do it as a domme.

There are two types of canes out there, flexible and inflexible. The inflexible ones really, really hurt. Nope, not for me, nor will I use one. The flexible ones can hurt pretty badly when used right, but they can also be used more gently. I greatly prefer a crop to a cane myself though.

Breast binding - ropes across my breats aroused me, but actual binding made them ache numbly and turned me off. I found it annoying and distracting. Not for me, but I could do it to a fem sub who liked it.

Trampling, needle zippers, no way. Not going there. Breath play with compression, such as "erotic strangulation" to heighten orgasm - very, very, very carefully.

Blood play, yes, but only lightly. Nothing serious. Not into vampirism though.

This is interesting. Let's keep going, folks. This is making me think about what my limits would be about stuff I've never experienced. And I often forget to metion stuff I've never experienced when talking about my limits. I bet others do the same thing.

 

[bytor2112]

too scary???

that therer exists so many morons who degrade themselves under the illusionment of fun....

poor sad bastards...

illusions are painfully shattered where discovery starts...

discover your own self worth!!

 

[AngelicAssassin]

discover

http://img.villagephotos.com/p/2003-8/363868/TrollAlert.jpg

 

[RavenSpirit2k4]

Yep. We have ourselves a genuine holier-than-thou troll.

Is it just me, or is it funny that these trolls deride us for degrading people sexually, when the reason they come here to troll is to feel superior to us pervs anyway?

Btw, AA, what is a Hairy Larry?

 

[FungiUg]

This has turned into an interesting thread!

And yeah, I want to know what a Hairy Larry is too.

Now, in-line with Netzach's stiletto trample, somehow just the thought of me in stilettos is rather scary!

 

[Luna_Wolf72]

Too scary (from my submissive days)

Blindfolds!! EEK, ack. Hate em, don't want em near me. I can't think about not being able to watch what is happening to me. Hell make me close my eyes, but don't blindfold me...

There you have it, in a nutshell.

Luna