What to do with my cheating wife

[Wanttoplease69]

Recently found out my wife of 23 years has been with 3 different guys on 6 different occasions, over the last few months. She met all of them on this web site.
Totaly caught of guard, and shocked.
Still love her more than ever, but my heart is broken, finding it very hard to forgive and forget. Want to work it out at any cost, she says she want to also, still not sure of that.

Any suggestions?

 

[NaughtyLil1]

I'd suggest seeking professional help. That, to me, seems to be too much to try to work through alone.

Good luck to you.

 

[Wanttoplease69]

Thanks, I'm finding it to be alot harder than I thought it would be.

 

[horndog201]

Kick Her To The Curb!

I could MAYBE forgive once, but 3 different guys on 6 occasions. It's time to let that slut go.

 

[waterhammer]

Recently found out my wife of 23 years has been with 3 different guys on 6 different occasions, over the last few months. She met all of them on this web site.
Totaly caught of guard, and shocked.
Still love her more than ever, but my heart is broken, finding it very hard to forgive and forget. Want to work it out at any cost, she says she want to also, still not sure of that.

Any suggestions?

i know EXACTLY where you're comin from. my wife has made 2 or 3 "mistakes" too. my difference may be that our kids are young, so splitting is not an option. we're workin it out.. still goin strong. trust takes a long time to re-build though.

 

[fergus4]

The professional help is an important step. There has to be other problems and contributing factors at work here and it will take a long time to get this sorted out. Have patience, and if she can handle it, and you can handle it, you have a chance.

fergus

 

[moridin00]

Professional help is the way to go, if you really feel it is that important to stay together. I know that, myself, I wouldn't even consider staying together and option, but I know that there can be other factors sometimes.

 

[freepass4sex]

Don't get mad....Get even! Plenty of hot women in the world!...Pick 1, or 2, or...

 

[Blushing Bottom]

Recently found out my wife of 23 years has been with 3 different guys on 6 different occasions, over the last few months. She met all of them on this web site.
Totaly caught of guard, and shocked.
Still love her more than ever, but my heart is broken, finding it very hard to forgive and forget. Want to work it out at any cost, she says she want to also, still not sure of that.

Any suggestions?

Spank her and if that doesn't then seek professional help.

 

[ickle_stace]

if you really wanna work it out then get professional help

although personally if anyone cheated on me and i found out about it, they'd be out of the door in a flash!

 

[Gave Up]

Recently found out my wife of 23 years has been with 3 different guys on 6 different occasions, over the last few months. She met all of them on this web site.
Totaly caught of guard, and shocked.
Still love her more than ever, but my heart is broken, finding it very hard to forgive and forget. Want to work it out at any cost, she says she want to also, still not sure of that.

Any suggestions?

in my experience, once a cheater, always a cheater. if she could do it more than once, i guarentee it'll happen again. maybe the trigger will be something as simple as a disagreement. kick her out and pick up the broken pieces before she steps on them again

 

[William4u]

Good source

I would suggest professional help for yourself and then her. After that you can make a reasoned decision.

This is a good resource that you can use.

http://www.dearpeggy.com/index.html

It will help you understand and figure what to do from here.

The site probably had little to do with it.

Good luck. You're not alone.

WM

 

[Medicine Hat]

I would suggest professional help for yourself and then her. After that you can make a reasoned decision.

Good luck. You're not alone.

WM

This is great advice. DEFINITELY see a counselor or therapist ASAP. Take your wife. If she refuses, go by yourself. After that, you can make an informed choice as to what stept to take after that.

I'm very sorry this happened to you. I can only imagine how difficult it must be. I wish you the best of luck.

 

[tangerine30660]

Hey dude, I know Im on the youngside of things here, and Im not even married but I too had a gf that I had been dating for about 2 years cheat on me. It broke my heart and has left me a bit rattled to this day. At first I was angry and could not forgive her because it was a huge slap in the face, of course you have more on the table then I did at the time. I know its hard to deal with and you probably feel humilated but if you do care about her and your family I definetly agree with everyone else in saying you should seek proffesional help. Something that is very hard is also trying to figure out what made her cheat? When I looked at the situation after awhile I realized that I wasn't giving my ex the attention she deserved and in a way am partly responsible for the decline in our relationship. WHo knows maybe there is something you havent done fore her that makes her go to others (whether it be sexual or emotional.) Its hard to move on and it will take a lot out of you emotionally, but hey man if you can works things out it might just be worth it.

 

[rshyam]

Tit for Tat

Don't get mad....Get even! Plenty of hot women in the world!...Pick 1, or 2, or...

Good advice. To bring her to sense. Tit for Tat is the best option. Make sex with other hot women and let her know. I'm sure it'll work. Good Luck .....

 

[mrbigone12003]

Maybe you and her need to look at swinging as an option.

 

[CuriousJack]

Piss the dirty, cheating whore off!

 

[sinnamongyrl]

although I would not call your wife a whore,,,,I do think there is some reason to be concerned.If you two did not have an "open" marriage,and she has has sex with that many other people,,,then maybe it is time to ask yourself if you want to stay together.Some people stray because that is their nature,,,,,some stray because they are seeking something they are not getting at home.I dont want to pass judgement on your wife OR the situantion,BUT I do think that maybe you should talk with someone for your own self.I am sorry that you are hurt and I hope that it all works out the best for you.I really dont have advice at this point,,,BUT lots of folks here are here to listen if you need to talk it out.

 

[BigGuyPA44]

after 20 years

After 20 years, she strays? Get professional help and find out why...talk to her...20 years is a lot to throw away. I have been there and it will help to work that out. See if you can find out why and if you can't beat her, join her? Maybe she just needs a little excitment in her life that she needs to find somewhere else? Maybe if you join her, it will enhance it more for both of you

Good Luck brother!

B

 

[ickle_stace]

This is great advice. DEFINITELY see a counselor or therapist ASAP. Take your wife. If she refuses, go by yourself. After that, you can make an informed choice as to what stept to take after that.

I'm very sorry this happened to you. I can only imagine how difficult it must be. I wish you the best of luck.

if you think you wanna make a go of it and she refuses to go get professional help, then definitely kick her out, cos if she really wants to make a go of it and treat you how you should have been treated before, then she'd agree to do anything it take IMO

 

[Medicine Hat]

if you think you wanna make a go of it and she refuses to go get professional help, then definitely kick her out, cos if she really wants to make a go of it and treat you how you should have been treated before, then she'd agree to do anything it take IMO

While I certainly agree that it is a very bad sign for the future of the relationship if she refuses to go along to counseling, I still say he should attend anyway. Why? Because the revalation of a cheating spouse is emotionally devastating. A therapist has likely worked with clients in similar situations and can help walk him through not only dealing with the fallout of a cheating spouse and potential divorce, but alsoconnect him to support and services as he attempts to rebuild his life.

 

[Cathleen]

While I certainly agree that it is a very bad sign for the future of the relationship if she refuses to go along to counseling, I still say he should attend anyway. Why? Because the revalation of a cheating spouse is emotionally devastating. A therapist has likely worked with clients in similar situations and can help walk him through not only dealing with the fallout of a cheating spouse and potential divorce, but alsoconnect him to support and services as he attempts to rebuild his life.

I agree wholeheartedly. This is the most sound and healthly approach, emotional and physical health.

Wanttoplease, sorry for your troubles. I wish you well.

 

[Guest]

If you don't want to work things out, call her out on the General Board.

 

[CuriousJack]

although I would not call your wife a whore

Then what would you call her?

Slut?

Bitch?

I hate people who cheat with a passion, a "one-off" is acceptable, IF there are other extreme circumstances involved, but anything more then that, is disgraceful.

Once a cheater, always a cheater.

Like a (former) friend of mine, she cheated on her boyfriend for 3 months, lying about it when confronted, she was "working back" a lot and he figured it out.

Anyway she begged to stay together, told him she wanted to be with him etc etc, after a lot of convincing he took her back, about 6 months later she hooks back up with the same guy (even though she changed jobs) and started fucking him again for about 8 months, then he grew a conscience and told her to break up with the bf and be with him, she refused and wanted to keep things the way they were!

And she wonders why nobody respects her!

 

[Gil_T2]

Recently found out my wife of 23 years has been with 3 different guys on 6 different occasions, over the last few months. She met all of them on this web site.
Totaly caught of guard, and shocked.
Still love her more than ever, but my heart is broken, finding it very hard to forgive and forget. Want to work it out at any cost, she says she want to also, still not sure of that.

Any suggestions?

Oh so many questions need looking at like:
*Is she new to the net or a site like this one?
*Do you have an open honest relationship where both can voice the wants & desires?
*Is she not getting what she wants intimacy wise or sex wise at home? (I admit that i have had many affairs with married ladies who only were after the sex as that is what was missing at home & also some of these whose kinks were not being met,everyone of these ladies said that the affair fill the void & home life was better for all involved.)
*Does she have a kink your not into?
*What reasons does she give for looking outside the relationship?
* is your heart broken because she had other men or that she had to look elsewhere for sexual satisfaction?