What makes your butt pucker?

[Never]

And I don't mean in a good way.

For me, it's people that stop at the beginning of a 500 ft merge lane, people who think comics are kiddie food and stupid comments 10 seconds after they leave my mouth, or fingers.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
This meaningless thread was brought to you by Butt Puckers; with a name like Puckers, it has to be good.

 

[*Jennifer-In-Flares*]

jim carey. i hate that guy. *jenny*

 

[Angel]

Ass puckering

Customers who come into my store and ask me where the Cigars are when they're right behind me.

Customers that ask you where something is and then get pissy with you when you don't carry it like its YOUR fault.


Bosses that expect you to get 10 hours work done in three hours because a cashier didnt show up and I had to sub instead of doing my own work for 7 hours.


Bosses who forget to send your health insurance paperwork in by the deadline and then demand you have a doctors note if you call in, knowing damn well you have no insurance so you're forced to work for two weeks with a fever that wont go away and no energy at all.


can you tell I hate my job?

 

[April]

Other drivers trying to occupy the same space I am. Making a horrible mistake and trying to occupy another driver's space.

Asking the boss if I can have tomorrow off. Calling in sick to work.

The thought of visiting my family this year. (yech)

I'm sure there are more, but that's all I can think of.

 

[Earthmuffin]

My ex-husband's voice.

A Dr. who thinks of me as office furniture.

ICQ tweakin' when I have insomnia.

The feeling of a 3000 lb vehicle sliding on ice towards anything.

 

[Rosebud]

never....are you thinking of me again?????

http://www.funnygreetings.com/purple%20face/greenface%20guy.gif

 

[Todd]

the chili I made last night sure is making my butt pucker right now.

 

[April]

OMG Rosebud, that is just so fucking funny!

 

[Never]

I'd call it stealing from you again but now that I think about it your version is much nicer.
Why, yes, when I think about you I tou- wait, no, wrong song.

Though I still don't understand how a person's butt could pucker in a good way.

 

[Adoratrice]

My husband says when I lick his lips it makes his butt pucker ...thats good ...right????

 

[Rosebud]

LOL Never babe...i could make your butt pucker in a good way.....i know you are thinking about me...so go ahead and touch yourself....MUHAHAHHAHHAHAHAHHAA....now where do you live??????? Me and Havoc need to adopt me a playmate......

 

[Guest]

The people in drive thru who somehow get pissed off at you when THEY make a mistake.

Snobby bitches at JC Penney and Elder Beerman when I walk in the store with sweats on.

Men who always blame everything on 'Women Drivers'

When a car full of people are in the Drive thru banking and ALL of them are making transactions.

Guys who always say "can I watch?" when we all know damn well they don't want to JUST WATCH LOL

ok I think thats enough lol

 

[Rosebud]

the chili I made last night sure is making my butt pucker right now.

thanks bobby toad.... that painted a perfectly stinky picture for me...LMAO

 

[Adoratrice]

Snobby bitches at JC Penney and Elder Beerman when I walk in the store with sweats on.


JC Penny snobs???? That's just a baby step up from Kmart isn't it??


when a car full of people are in the Drive thru banking and ALL of them are making transactions.



GRRR ...you have no idea how this irks me.....Our sign says 3 transactions...that does not mean per person!!
And we are not mind readers ...do not give us that stupid look when we ask you what you would like us to do with the unsigned check you just sent thru the tube...because trust me ...we already have some ideas of what to do with it.


Guys who always say "can I watch?" when we all know damn well they don't want to JUST WATCH LOL




well we should at least try to make them feel wanted...right?

 

[Guest]

JC Penny snobs???? That's just a baby step up from Kmart isn't it?? LOL yeah. but the nerve of those people

well we should at least try to make them feel wanted...right? now why would we want to do that? LOL



[/B]

 

[Guest]

Something else...

Men who only want 'EYECANDY'
and nothing below supermodel quality

 

[Mustang Sally]

So basically what you're saying is people doing their best impressions of an asshole make your real asshole cringe in embarrassment.

 

[Adoratrice]

JC Penny snobs???? That's just a baby step up from Kmart isn't it?? LOL yeah. but the nerve of those people

well we should at least try to make them feel wanted...right? now why would we want to do that? LOL



they do come in handy for some of the more interesting 4-some positions



also....people who are always fake acting
my mothers voice
when my husband uses the last check in my
book and doesn't tell me & I only find out after spending 2 hours at the wallpaper store and am finally ready to pay.
finding hair in my food
school principals who think they are always right and ALL children are wrong.
favoritism
not knowing how to do math in my head
bratty kids who need their asses busted
Parents who don't know they have bratty kids
Parents who know but don't care

I'll have more later.

 

[Guest]

Rosebud:
"LOL Never babe...i could make your butt pucker in a good way.....i know you are thinking about me...so go ahead and touch yourself....MUHAHAHHAHHAHAHAHHAA....now where do you live??????? Me and Havoc need to adopt me a playmate......"

Do I really want to become a plaything to a woman that says, "MUHAHAHHAHHAHAHAHHAA" when she considers what she's going to do to me?

The thought makes my butt pucker ... But I'm not sure if it's in a good way or a bad way.

 

[Lajo]

Butt Puckering...

...Pulling a 10 ft python out of a toilet! (Glad it was not in MY house!)

...tripping over a garden hose and falling down on my back while being attacked by two 50+ lb Pit Bulls (but I am good and they did NOT bite me. They did realize that it was a mistake to attack me)

...having a nutcase hold a hand grenade in his hand, finger in the pin, and say "I know how to take care of this problem."

...hearing that two of my co-workers have been shot!

...almost having a wreck (i think that is worse than actually having the accident)

 

[Endlessly]

Begging the finance office to let me stay in college when the balance on my account was from THEIR fuck-up.

Hearing the man I'm moving to alabama for tell another woman he loves her.

Being told I look like any celebrity except for Geena Davis.

*Especially* Being told I look like an overweight Jessica Alba.

Hearing "But there are so many other things I find attractive about you" when I'm bitching to my singificant other about my appearance, as opposed to telling me I'm wrong.

Having doctors take one look at my medical history and saying "Dear God, why aren't you on Lithium?" before they even let me open my mouth to say hello.

Admitting a two-year crush to someone only to have them ignore it in favor of requesting masturbation in pigtails.

Getting yelled at for trying to subsist on a diet of bottled water and stomach crunches when.. well.. see but-puckerer number four.

And most of all, negative-energy questions that just nake the funk I'm in worse.

Bah.

 

[Never]

Masturbation... in... pigtails?!

 

[Bushido71XS]

John Ashcroft, Attorney General

 

[JadedHeart]

When my roommate grinds her teeth in her sleep! It makes me want to slap the silly girl, or slap the girl silly. Whichever.

 

[BrainyBeauty]

Lemons