What Made You Smile Today, v6

My daughter always puts a huge bag of candy together and takes it to the kids next door, and they always have a bag for her, too! Tonight, the neighbor told her she's "grown up so much and is so beautiful." She came home with a huge smile, and her only remark was on how excited the kids were about that big bag of candy. Her happiness was in giving to them. I think I'll keep her! ❤️
 
A man was sitting reading his papers when his wife hit him round the head with a frying pan.

'What was that for?' the man asked.

The wife replied ,'That was for the piece of paper with the name Jenny on it that I found in your pants pocket.

The man then said 'When I was at the races last week, Jenny was the name of the horse I bet on.'

The wife apologized and went on with the housework. Three days later the man is watching TV when his wife bashes him on the head with an even bigger frying pan, knocking him unconscious.

Upon re-gaining consciousness the man asked why she had hit him again.

Wife replied. 'Your horse phoned'
 
Having a customer bitch me out for 15 minutes, then spend about 30 seconds researching her issue to find out that she was 100% wrong and getting to tell her (in the most polite and professional way possible) that she is wrong and can go fuck herself.
 
My wife, she woke up from a nap mid afternoon. I walked in the house, and she nearly flew out of her skin, standing in the hallway in her undies, hair a mess, with a confused look on her face...

Wish I could get a nap that good! 😂
 
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