what does "single" mean to you?

[Mz_Scarlett]

I have to admit, I'm getting increasingly more jaded by the day. I don't want to be redundant and go into all that happened to me last Friday- in a nutshell, my best male friend in the city betrayed me by going out with someone who had turned on me and then hiding it from me and then lying to me before telling me the truth. 'nough said on that.

I have been chatting with someone from Lit on the phone, on email and on AIM. When I first started chatting with him, he told me he was single. Today he tells me that he's "single" but that he has a girlfriend that has been living with him for 5 years. To me, this does NOT qualify as being single. I would have wanted to be friends with this individual regardless of him being involved with someone, but the fact that he wasn't truthful about it upset me and now I've lost trust in that relationship.

So this is my question- what does single mean to you?

I consider "single" to be no attachments. Even if I am not committed to one individual, I always qualify that ie: I'm single, but I am dating someone non-exclusively.

Thoughts??

 

[April]

Single means not married, not having a girl/boyfriend of x number of years/months. Single means not involved with anyone at all. If this guy can't figure this out, then he's not worth any effort, IMO.

 

[Elizabeth]

To me, single means unattached. No spouse, no exclusive bf/gf. Not almost divorced or almost broken up.

 

[sexyspank]

Sorry

Sorry to hear you've had problems.
Single to me means

One
Unattached
Alone
Not with a partner


don't give up,try to raise a smile and have faith in the future.




Wendy

 

[T.H. Oughts]

Single, is no boyfriend (someone you see as a regular thing), no live in partner and no husband.

 

[MorgaineLaFay]

Personally for me, my dating status doesn’t exude who I am. I don’t feel the need to discuss my SO here. But that is just me. This is MY place. I come here to get away from the everyday bullshit that haunts me.

Being married, or saying I am someone’s girlfriend doesn’t tell you who I am. So for me I see no reason to talk about it.

But...and that is a big, heavy sigh but...I too have been lied too ... and it hurts ... but I am the type of person who tries to see all sides to the story. I know we all do things for our own reasons. Tell our own stories the way we want to. Maybe this other person was hurting as well. Maybe they are unhappy and want to be single. Or they simple feel alone.

What do I know?


Morgy

 

[estevie]

I agree, 'single' means no attatchments. Single means one, if there is another, its not single. Simple really.

 

[Wiggles]

If I was dating non-exclusively I would consider myself single.

If I'm dating someone, and we call each other boy/girl friends, then I'm no longer single.

It's all about the level of commitment.

Sorry to hear about your bad luck with the males, Mz. Scarlett

 

[freakygirl]

Single means not married, not having a girl/boyfriend of x number of years/months. Single means not involved with anyone at all. If this guy can't figure this out, then he's not worth any effort, IMO.

she stole my words..

 

[SempreAngela]

Single..

..alone but not lonely.
No reason to make excuses to anyone.
No attachments of the heart.
No regrets.
Able to give what I choose to give.
Being available for all things bright and beautiful.
No tears.
No lies.
Responsible only for myself.

It is NOT a bad way to live.

 

[roxie]

Single= unnattatched in any way shape or form.


Maybe he was confusing being single with I'm taken but looking for my next ex?













*disclaimer: Roxie is in a really smart ass mood today. Beware!

 

[alexandraaah]

How lame...

of that guy.

Single, to humans who speak and breathe means no attachments.

Single to applications and other such forms means simply not married.

Apparently, someone chose to be literal...which was obviously misleading.

 

[Viscountess]

not attached at the hip

I think, (my own personal experience) When he walks out the door it means single.
When are the hospitals going to start taging boys at birth?

single means one, all the time, not just away from home.

 

[SexyChele]

To me, single means unattached - no spouse, no live in, no exclusive dating relationship. Simple. Easy to understand.




I wonder where the guys are on this one?

 

[MunchinMark]

Single means no romantic attachments, or at most in the very early stages of a relationship and I hesitate to apply the word to that.

Involved means in a relationship that is serious. Without being engaged to be married.

 

[NoRegrets]

Not Single

One of the most intersting parts of life is how and where we draw the lines but this isn't even close.

Living with someone for 5 years is not single.

People who lie to get what they want rarely make good freinds. Anyway, that's my take on it.

 

[Ishmael]

single

Ibid, all the above.

I'm a die hard romantic. A sexual relationship to me is a commintment, and that means 'attached'. Not single.

I wouldn't have anything to do with a woman that has casual, multiple, sexual partners.

I don't care to discuss the point, it's just the way I am and I really have no intention of changing. It's lead to a great deal of disappointment, but the rewards have been unbeleivable.

Ishmael

 

[morninggirl5]

Single means there is no implied, stated, or real commitment to another person. Single ceases to be the term when a relationship reaches the point of exclusivity. Then, you're attached. You may not be engaged, married, or living together, but you're attached.


I agree, where are the male voices on this question? They seemingly have another definition and i would like to hear their reasoning.

 

[Ishmael]

see abpve

I agree, where are the male voices on this question? They seemingly have another definition and i would like to hear their reasoning.

See the above post. One man's view anyway.

Ishmael

 

[Weird Harold]

So this is my question- what does single mean to you?

To me, it means my kids are too old to claim as dependents so I can file as "Head of Household".

Seriously, single means "not married" and has very little bearing on dating. It only becomes a factor when things progress from dating to a "relationship."

 

[Gamelover221]

I personally agree with what everyone else is saying.

I do have one male friend though, that considers himself "single" unless there's been a verbal contract made to see someone exclusively. Damn lawyer type...

I have one female friend that was dating 3 guys at one point last year and sleeping with at least one of them and still considered herself "single."

A different female friend I have says that she's never been on a "date" in her life because no one has specifically said "Will you go out on a date with me?"

People and their word games drive me nuts!

 

[RavenStorm]

I agree with the people up here also. I am married although I am legally separated. I will not be single until my divorce. Then and only then will I be single. I will date and go out with someone. I will never go back to my husband so I don't feel like I am cheating.

 

[DntWkeTheNghbrs]

Hey Sexy!

I'm really sorry to hear about your bad luck! I agree with what everyone has said; if someone says they're "single" that should imply they don't live with a boyfriend or girlfriend!

I'm happy to see you're having some fun on the boards anyway. This is such a special place! I hope you find the love you deserve!

 

[Unclebill]

Well, technically, . . .

I have to agree with WH; single means not married. And technically, he didn't lie.

However, I have no respect for someone like this who purposely distorts or misrepresents something for their benefit. IMNTBHO, this is the caliber of man who will quibble over what the meaning of is is.

Frankly, if he couldn't be honest about this, you have little reason to put any trust in whatever else he might tell you. What he wants he has already demonstrated to be more important than being honest with you.

 

[Weird Harold]

Re: Well, technically, . . .

I have to agree with WH; single means not married. And technically, he didn't lie.

However, I have no respect for someone like this who purposely distorts or misrepresents something for their benefit. IMNTBHO, this is the caliber of man who will quibble over what the meaning of is is.

I would never tell a woman I'm "Single" -- I'd tell her I'm divorced and unattached. I wouldn't use "single" because there's far to many interpretations of that status -- i.e. "singles" bars, clubs, etc where anone who is unaccompanied when they enter is "single."

Like you UB, I believe in being as precise as possible -- "single" just doesn't qualify as precise except as a tax filing status.