What do you do when you find out you've been naive?

[J.B.]

Well.. I have to admit. I have been. I was dumb enough to think that because he had proposed to me & claimed that he loved me that he would be faithfull even though he was in another state...
WOW
Talk about naive...
I call & find out he's been seeing another woman for the past week...
So what am I going to do you ask? Well if I were there I'd be temped to kill him... If not come through with my promise to bobittize him... But well he's just not worth the effort. I am mad that I was dumb enough to fall for him though. Well I'm going to get on with my life & tell him to go to hell...

And so ends another chapter of When you've just been too naive

 

[lobito]

JB, there's a difference between being naive, and being decieved. you were the 2nd. F U C K E D Fucked!

 

[Elizabeth]

Hugs for you. There isn't anything I can say to make you feel better.

 

[seXieleXie]

*hugs*
i'm really sorry to hear that jailbait. the bastard doesn't deserve you, obviously.

 

[Shy Tall Guy]

JB, there's a difference between being naive, and being decieved. you were the 2nd. F U C K E D Fucked!

For the third time or so in as many days, what he said.

To love someone you have to trust them. That is not naive that is a requirement.

Naive is cheating on a loving woman and thinking it is not going to come back and bite you in the ass.

I was tempted to vote "walk away", which is probably what I would wind up doing, but it would depend on what stage of the relationship I was in, and how/why she cheated on me. The end effect would probably be the same though.

Sorry to hear this happened to you, but obviously he is scum and you are better off without him. His loss.

 

[Cheyenne]

I'm sure you've heard this already, but it is lucky you found out BEFORE the wedding. Easier to call off an engagement than it is to go through a divorce, although I doubt either would be much fun. Sorry.

 

[Weird Harold]

Well.. I have to admit. I have been. I was dumb enough to think that because he had proposed to me & claimed that he loved me that he would be faithfull even though he was in another state...

Breech of Promise laws are archaic and sexist, but they're still on the books in most states. Depending on how the law is worded in the applicable jurisdiction you could make him (or at least his wallet) very sorry.

Of course if the law is worded such that you can only force him to marry you, it probably won't do you much good -- you definitely don't want to marry him.

 

[J.B.]

Thank you for your kind thoughts... Tough I know it sounds corny, it does feel nice to have someone else say he's the S.O.B... I really hate acting all weak & weepy though so F him

 

[Rubyfruit]

Swallow hard, and move on baby.

 

[Vinny]

Hug

First you deserve a huge HUGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
Now when I was younger, I used to say "I will kill that SOB" One thing has changed. "I would not kill someone from cheating on me because I am more mature now. Yes someone cheated on me and got preggers. But one thing has not changed. They still are an SOB so darling, hang in there and try to move on. Keep busy to keep your mind occupied and email or pm a friend whenever you need to talk.

 

[sexy-girl]

so F him

those words prove you arent naive ... im sorry it must be very tough on you at moment but you have the right attitude *hugs* take care i wish you well through this ... im sorry

 

[Paradyce]

Quite honestly, I can understand how you feel - really! My husband of 12 years is leaving me for someone he met on line, and never actually met in r/l...

May they both be incredibly happy together. I'm getting on with my life, and I will be happier without the bastard...

 

[J.B.]

May they both be incredibly happy together. I'm getting on with my life, and I will be happier without the bastard...

I agree... & I am sorry for your situation as well...
They're just not worth it...
I hope I don't sound all bitter & depressed. I would really hate to come across as one of those victorian novel heroins. You know back of my hand to my forehead feeling a faint comming on. I just felt that I had to let all of this steam out .

 

[Andreina]

same shit happend to me last year (although we weren't engaged but "just" in a long term relationship)... first of all i hid in my room and cried for 2 days, my friends came to feed me with chocolate and orange juice. Then i realized that i'd only do him favour if i drown myself in self-pitty and moved on.

oh - and put a photo of his eeny meeny teeny tiny cock up in our local supermarket with his phone number underneath and a note on the side that his mom makes pretty good apple strudel for the church picnic on sundays. and that he was a lying bastard who loved being fucked with a strap-on up his arse.


it worked.

 

[Paradyce]

I would really hate to come across as one of those victorian novel heroins. You know back of my hand to my forehead feeling a faint comming on.

Well, you could do the whole "hand to the forehead" thing, only just keep the middle finger up as you turn and walk away from the man who is obviously not worthy of someone like you...

 

[Vinny]

399th post

Been trying to think before I sleep what to use my 3rd hundreth post for. Well it is for jailbait and paradyce. Hugs hang in there darlings

 

[Paradyce]

Been trying to think before I sleep what to use my 3rd hundreth post for. Well it is for jailbait and paradyce. Hugs hang in there darlings

Thanks sweetie... (((HUGS))) to you too...

 

[J.B.]

Well, you could do the whole "hand to the forehead" thing, only just keep the middle finger up as you turn and walk away from the man who is obviously not worthy of someone like you...

Good point! or... I could do what LittleDevil did..

oh - and put a photo of his eeny meeny teeny tiny cock up in our local supermarket with his phone number underneath and a note on the side that said he was a lying bastard who loved being fucked with a strap-on up his arse.

nahhh... too much effort on my part...

Oh & Vinny?
muah! Thanks hun..

 

[plasticman33]

It's a sad fact of human nature, but walk away, life goes on! Hugs!

 

[fallon2]

Corny but true . . .

Remember that tomorrow is another day and just think what would have happened if you and he had become more than lovers . . . better to find out before you bought a house together and/or had kids.
The hurting will continue as it must but you WILL get over it. Hang in there and SMILE since it will confuse the bastards!

 

[MissTaken]

After a brief period of "Oh God! Was i ever stupid?" and the hurt becomes a dull ache, I get on with life.

 

[Pechorin]

ALL MEN ARE...

...not the same.

As has been said above, better to find out now then after the "I do" bit.

Hindsight is a wonderful thing. Everything is obvious after the event. Don't go analysing it all too much. Take a deep breath, draw a line and move on.

(but if you do see his car at the mall one day, be sure to let all four tyres down)

Take care.

 

[privy2u]

I agree with Cheyenne JB. It's better you discover now that he's fucking around than to find out later.
You weren't nieve! A trust was broken. It's a very serious risk we all take in the beginning and over time we prove to our partner that we are trustworthy. My wife and I had both been in bad marriages prior to meeting. Over time the risk we each took has grown.
Some day you will meet someone that is willing to take that risk seriously.

Privy