What do I do???

[Christine]

I have a good relationship with my boyfriend, all is going just well, we're actually moving in together the 1st of august...

There's only one little problem... I want sex a lot more than he does!... what do I do???

 

[Dixon Carter Lee]

Details. More details. How should we know without knowing ANYTHING about you? Is he overweight? That causes a lack of sex drive. Are you a nymphomaniac? Is he over 50? Are you reaching your sexual peak? Are you asking for things he doesn't like? Were you virigns when you met? What are your astrologcial signs? Does he masturbate too much? What are we supposed to say unless you tell us anything?

Sorry, don't mean to be all prickily. "Help Me" posts with no info are just a pet peeve of mine. It's MY problem, and I'm looking for therapy. But these damn Doctors just want to know EVERYTHING...

 

[Christine]

To answer your questions asked... we're both not overweight.. we're both 24... we were both not virgins when we met, I don't think he masturbates too much (although it's not something we discuss over dinner!

We're a perfectly normal young couple (or I think so at least) but he just doesn't have the same sex-drive... maybe I am a bit demanding on the sexual side (now I'm talking about the frequency). I would like sex every single day... is that a lot?

 

[Stormystarr]

It's not to much at all, if I could, i'd have sex 5 times a day! Now thats a lot. And I don't think your needs are out of the ordinary. Have you tried to do something different? That always works for me. I hope it gets better for you.

 

[Skibum]

This may not be much help, but if you take the time to seduce him at least once a day, I don't think he would mind!

 

[Dixon Carter Lee]

If he's moving in with you he must be happy with you sexually. But no one likes to go to bed like they're punching a clock, and maybe he's feeling pressured to perform. If you drop the subject he may just start asking for sex more often.

 

[Svedish_Chef]

And of course if all else fails just rub him up a bit!

Da chef

 

[dancinvixen]

Christine, right now I am having the same problem as you. My drs. informaed me (much to my chagrin in the middle of the waiting room) that I was hitting one of my sexual peaks. My poor husband just cannot keep up with me. And it also doesn't help that every time I get up on stage and dance I come damn close to having an orgasm or actually having one. <g>

 

[Ambrosious]

I would have a lot more sex if my wife would make the first move. I know that this topic has been discussed a lot, but when she doesn't or I don't, ain't neither one gettin' it.

Please consider that if he doesn't want to have sex at that moment, he might later.

And turn off the tv.

 

[dancinvixen]

Sheesh. The tv excuse? <g> Of course I guess in my house it helps that the only entertainment we really have is the 'net or a book (in the middle of reading L.Ron Hubbard's Battlefield Earth, A really thrilling book. It soo pulls the reader in.)

 

[Endlessly]

My advice would be for both of you to move here, and I'd be more than happy to do what I could in keeping you content.

Whoaaaa.. Sorry.. Male moment there.

If it makes you feel any better, hon, that's a problem I've ALWAYS had with the guys I've dated.. -none- of them have ever been able to keep up with my sexual appetite. And it's like traffic, you know, the more you expand the lanes the more traffic will come to fill the space; in the same vein, the more sexual attention I get, the more I crave.

Once a day is SO not too much to be asking.. My first advice would be for you to check his pulse. My second bit of advice would be to do something spontaneous every day, something new and different-- with your clothes, hair, makeup, what have you-- that turns YOU on, makes YOU feel sexy. It's hard for anyone to not find someone sexy who obviously feels it.. And that's always the first step.

 

[dancinvixen]

Now tha Endlessly mentions doing something new. Have you ever tried public flashing? Some guys love it when the woman they are with really shows off for her guy. I know many men who love looking, and love watching the looks their women get.

 

[Jonas]

Christine... If you feel he's wasting his talents on masturbation you have got to talk to him. If you can't maintain an open dialog about sex you'll never expand your
or your husbands sexual horizons. At twenty four the best is yet to come. Of course some flashing couldn't hurt.

 

[SeXy ReDHeD]

Dearest Christine~

Curious... my very, very first post on here was amazingly similar to yours! But anyway...

Endlessly and DancinVixen have got some good ideas... guys really do LOVE to watch!! Just read any story on here...

But, if you're not feeling quite that adventurous, try something simple like sending him a sexy email during the day, or calling him during lunch and telling him what you want to do to him that night, take some sexy Polaroids and slip 'em in his pocket on his way out the door... I know it sounds cheesy and old and lame, but I swear, the simplest things work! I guess the point of all this is to be spontaneous! Do something different.

Or, worst case scenario, perhaps you two will just never mesh sexually. An awful thought, but I think it happens quite often. In that case, I think you just have to decide just how important the sex really is to you...