What are stepdaddies for, anyway?

[Guest]

My wife's 22-year-old daughter still lives with us (dammit) but our household is--different, you might say.

This afternoon, as the stepdaughter was preparing to head out to meet a friend, she was playing with a set of nipple clamps. You know the type--a chain attached to small metal spring-loaded alligator clips with a thumbscrew for adjusting tension. Turns out that they belong to an on-and-off boyfriend with whom she'd had a recent fight. For no good reason, she'd had them draped around her neck post-fight and forgot about them as she walked around our local Walmart. It was only as she got into vehicle and they dropped into her purse that she remembered.

The upshot is that one of the thumbscrews had fallen out and the (apparently on-again) boyfriend had told her that she owed him a new set of nipple clamps. I opined that I didn't think we had a spare thumbscrew but my wife reminded me that one of the replaceable rubber tips was missing on our set, hence the lack of use.

I fetched ours and it turns out that our set is identical to her boyfriends, save that ours is a bit heavier-duty, and the thumbscrews are an identical match. So, we gave her one. The stepdaughter was greatly pleased and then started laughing uncontrollably. She finally said that, when the thumbscrew came up missing, she'd told her boyfriend, "I bet my mom can help."

I told her we expected pictures.

Just before she took off, she was wondering where to buy .380 ammo for a handgun that she wants to test before buying. I told her that I had some that she could blow off, enough for four or five clips; it's a couple of years old and I won't miss it.

She left a happy camper, but not before thanking me. I said, "Hey--what are stepdaddies for?"

Which earned me an eyeroll and an "Oh, my God" but she was laughing, too.

Yeah, we're a little different...

 

[john-the-author]

Kinda sounds a bit like our house. The Wonderchild lives with us but we don't necessarily see a lot of her. I was the one who bought her good condoms when she went off to college her freshman year and I've been the one who talks to her about some of the stranger things that her mother really would rather not know about.

I'm hoping she moves out eventually, but I'm not holding my breath. I give it another year, year and a half. Grad school may be the ticket, particularly if she ends up elsewhere.

 

[Handley_Page]

There's something very special about being a step-Dad.

 

[john-the-author]

There really is, Handley. I'm pleased with the place I have in my stepkids lives and hearts.

 

[Boota]

I've corrupted my stepkids to the point that everyone is sure they are biologically mine. Damn they are fun.

 

[Handley_Page]

When their Mother died a few years ago, I was worried that they'd all go their own way and forget me. I'm pleased to say they haven't and I have a nice set of Grandchildren.

 

[SlickTony]

Every now and then something brings it home to me why I like this place so much. In the other forum I hang out in, a story like that would have brought on about 30 pages of oh how skeevy and squalls for brain bleach.

 

[Boxlicker101]

One of the neat things about stepchildren is that you usually don't have to go through all the hassle and expense of raising them, but you eventually get to be a grandparent.

 

[Handley_Page]

One of the neat things about stepchildren is that you usually don't have to go through all the hassle and expense of raising them, but you eventually get to be a grandparent.

And, even if you've changed a nappy, wiped a bum, grounded the little blighter, there is an enormous sense of pride when they hand you your grandchild.

 

[pornwriter]

If you are going to post a story about the stepdaugther; at the very least you could be porking her in the pooper.
What are stepchildren for?

 

[Boxlicker101]

If you are going to post a story about the stepdaugther; at the very least you could be porking her in the pooper.
What are stepchildren for?

I do have one like that - "Stephanie's Back Door."

 

[Guest]

If you are going to post a story about the stepdaugther; at the very least you could be porking her in the pooper.
What are stepchildren for?

Nope.

I do have an "incest lite" story about a stepdaughter, though. Same great taste, fewer unwanted incestuous grandkids.



ETA:

But if it's any consolation, she had abysmal taste in men when she was 19 or so. At my suggestion, my wife and I bought her a vibrator and an instruction manual for Christmas. It worked--she quit rushing into completely dysfunctional relationships and was generally much nicer to be around. Well, more relaxed, anyway.

And I know she used the vibrator, because we've been treated to the "closed door concert" a time or three.