What am I doing wrong?

[AnitaAhz]

So, my Summer Break series seems to be the least successful of my stories ratings-wise and I was wondering if anyone could please give me some insight as to why this is the case. I actually thought that these were the most well-written of the bunch. Anyway, I've just posted the last chapter in the series (I figured I'd retire it after I wrote each character their own chapter).

Please let me know what you think and where I went astray in this series so I know what to avoid in the future.

Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4

Thanks!

-Anita

 

[MagicFingers]

You deserve a reply, Miss Little!

So, my Summer Break series seems to be the least successful of my stories ratings-wise and I was wondering if anyone could please give me some insight as to why this is the case. I actually thought that these were the most well-written of the bunch. Anyway, I've just posted the last chapter in the series (I figured I'd retire it after I wrote each character their own chapter).

Please let me know what you think and where I went astray in this series so I know what to avoid in the future.

Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4

Thanks!

-Anita

I read some of your older stories long ago, like "In The Stacks" and enjoyed them.
I have only read part 1 & 4 of this series, so I can't comment on the whole thing. However, I also think they are well written, as you thought they were.
The only problem I can see is that, well, I hate to even say this, but they seem a little boring. I don't know why. Maybe some character development or showing of their thoughts might help? Why was Veronica so hot for him? What was she thinking?

If you can liven it up, keep writing it. OR, you might want to end it after the stories about each character, as you mentioned, then move on to another story idea.

I like your writing, so keep it up, whatever you decide.
One final comment. I feel some of my best stories are in the Erotic Couplings category also. However, the best ones are hovering around 4.4x voting and I don't get an "H". I have other stories, like the ones in Incest category, that get much better voting. I think is is very hard to get proper high voting in the EC category. I don't know why, but I think that is part of your problem, and not due to your writing, so keep it up.

PS: You seem to have PC's turned off. Maybe if you had them turned on you could be getting some useful feedback?

 

[Synthia]

Summer Break

Your stories are very well written indeed.

I'm pretty new myself, but it seems some new or different theme which has not been done many times before will get some attention.

Also something that "strikes a chord" with the readers, but it's hard to predict what that might be. I put one on about fooling around with married women (infidelity) and didn't expect it to do well, but it got a lot of positive feedback and a rating just below 4.5. Go figure. But it did strike a chord according to the reader feedback.

Synthia

 

[The Neon Wolf]

Hey!

Just finished reading the first two chapters, I think they were pretty well written. Only thing I can see as well as maybe if you gave the characters a bit more background.

Other then that, it was a good read keep it up.

 

[AnitaAhz]

Thanks!

Thanks for the feedback! It's been really helpful.

The only thing about giving too much back story is that I'm afraid readers will get impatient and move on. I know when I'm writing the stories I even get a bit impatient to get to the - pardon the pun - climax. I'll try to find a way though to build up the characters a bit more in the future though.

Thanks again! Anything else?

 

[Colleen Thomas]

Part of it hasn't anything to do with your writing. Successive chapters will tend to have fewer votes/views than proceeding ones. Anyone who didn't like one is unlikely to read two and so on down the line. Also as your story developes, you naturally cut out various continuing story lines. A reader who loved one and found two didn't follow where his imagination went may vote lower simply because it isn't what is expected.

 

[elfin_odalisque]

I've quietly read the lot and I think you write very well. I enjoy reading your prose but I struggled a bit with your series.

To be frank, the series doesn't lead you to want to know the POV of the next protagonist. Unless you've read all the parts, why would you care or empathise with the 'hero'?

Because you know, in your mind, the reactions of the characters, you can read more into the stories than the stumbling reader. There needs to be a closer link between the postings to sell the story. Think of soaps!

Don't take this badly. I think you write very well.

 

[AnitaAhz]

Yeah, I figured a big part of it was that there wasn't much of a link between the stories. I was kind of trying to have things both ways... a story broken down into 4 parts that focuses on each character one at a time that were connected but could stand on their own. I figured that since there were large time gaps between postings, it wouldn't matter too much that there wasn't a strong link, but I guess I was wrong. Good to know for next time though.