Need criticism for my second chapter, as it's doing worse than first chapter.

[eddie_805]

Hi, I'm new to writing and I started writing a multi part story series involving incest and sci-fi primarily. The first chapter I wrote was primarily focused on incest and got good views and rating for first time, which motivated me to write further.

However when I posted the second chapter, I have gotten much worse views and ratings. Would someone be willing to read through the second chapter and share their thoughts on what's lacking?

Here's the link : https://www.literotica.com/s/spark-of-life-ch-02

Link for first chapter : https://www.literotica.com/s/spark-of-life-ch-01

Alternatively, short summary for first chapter : Krish is a 21 year old guy living alone with his 18 year old sister Riya after his parents passed away. One day he finds an app that lets him make changes in anyone's body, as well as seeing their statuses, distance etc. Using the app to seduce his sister by making her horny, they engage in oral sex.

Same night he discovers his childhood friend Alina is having a party at his neighbor Cathy's house. Using the app again, he sees Alina passed out, with a bunch of men alone. With help from his sister, he peeks on the house and sees Cathy is recording Alina get taken advantage of by multiple men and he uses the app to make everyone unconscious to get her out of there.

Krish puts the unconscious Alina in his own room, watching over her as his sister walks away showing signs of jealousy. He waits for a bit before going back to his sister, confessing that he always cares more about her than anyone else. Immediately feeling horny, Riya again makes our with his brother in bed, as she orgasms, and both of them go to sleep.

 

[TheWritingGroup]

In general, later chapters seem to do worse in terms of views than first. My own Liz Enslaved's chapter 2 got about one-third as many views as the first. As for the score dropping ... maybe people don't want to read really long chapters? It looks like your #2 is about 50% longer than 1. It's really hard to understand ratings on Literotica, there are multiple threads where people discuss it and can't really conclude anything.

-Annie

 

[eddie_805]

Thank you so much for your kind response.

I was aware of the length, and it's because I put a lot of non-erotic story and character building dialogue with setups for big reveals and plot twists in this one, hoping that would make a fun read rather than just writing plain sex between multiple characters.

This resulted in overall two erotic scenes in the entirety with one at beginning and one near the end. Is it possible that that's also the reason?

And just a little more advice, should I spent a few more weeks tweaking for more sex scenes and less length and then re-releasing this chapter, or I just continue with the third chapter? I am currently happy with the plot of the second chapter, just not the ratings...

Thanks a lot for helping me again!

 

[AlinaX]

I need to stop writing those Apps.

 

[TheWritingGroup]

Thank you so much for your kind response.

This resulted in overall two erotic scenes in the entirety with one at beginning and one near the end. Is it possible that that's also the reason?

It's possible. Like I wrote, it's hard for anyone to know why people rate the way they do, unless you got a dozen comments saying, "Boring! Had to wait too long between sex scenes."

I can say this: my Chapter 3 has wall-to-wall sex (but the ending is plot and character).

-Annie

 

[ElectricBlue]

And just a little more advice, should I spent a few more weeks tweaking for more sex scenes and less length and then re-releasing this chapter, or I just continue with the third chapter? I am currently happy with the plot of the second chapter, just not the ratings...

Publish your third, and expect another drop in the number of Views. That's typical - a 50% drop-off from Chapter One to Chapter Two, another 50% to Chapter Three. The Chapter Three View count will then drop off more slowly to the last chapter - assuming you are publishing regularly.

My advice is always, don't bother futzing with an old story or existing chapters. You'll get more readers by releasing more content, not re-hashing existing content.

 

[eddie_805]

Thanks a lot for the straight forward advice!

I had posted a request for removal, but the next day 3-4 more people rated the story well, taking it above 4 star, so I immediately cancelled the removal request. Despite low view count, I'm happy now that atleast few people are liking the story, and I want to continue writing the story for them, with the original plot I had in mind.

Hopefully I can start a new series after finishing this one and get more people to read

 

[TheWritingGroup]

I'm pretty new to Literotica, but in regular publishing there's the concept of a "backlist". If you write something really popular in 2 years, people who like it might check out your previous work.

-Annie

 

[ElectricBlue]

I'm pretty new to Literotica, but in regular publishing there's the concept of a "backlist". If you write something really popular in 2 years, people who like it might check out your previous work.

-Annie

That is very true here. I have ten year long story file, and the whole thing continues to get reads at almost the same rate, even the oldest stories. I get comments on my first stories, which pleases me, because it means folk are finding my content even though it's not new. Obviously there's a kick-up in Views whenever I do publish something new, but thold content doesn't sit and languish in isolation.

It's also why I say to authors, don't worry about your release strategy so much - once the while thing is out there, none of that matters.

 

[Rob_Royale]

I agree with all above. Views drop off dramatically after the first. I charted my trilogy after each had been published for five months and there was a 55% drop in views on everything after part 1. It's just the cross to bear if you're going to serialize your work. As for the ratings drop, there's just no way to gauge that.

 

[Rob_Royale]

In addition, what I have found about releasing additional chapters is that somehow it encourages people to check out your other work. I just posted Freebody Manor Ch. 02 and readers are lighting up my earlier works. Granted with only two stories it's not a factor for you, but when your story list is longer, you'll appreciate it.