What A Fucking Year Long Trip It's Been!

[Dhalgren]

I just realized that today I've been reading, gleaming, commenting, learning, corresponding, befriending you Lit people for an entire year, on this day.

My post count doesn't really reflect how well I've come to know some of you truly wonderful people.
I just rarely want to say something already so eloquently said by some wise soul.

This is not a list thread..I don't particapte in those. I'm simply stating my thanks to a few people in one blanket thread..(besides if I started a thread..oh, say about cym, she'd blush and stuff)

Cym…
Thank you for existing. I wish I was a BDSMer just so I could relate to the board you -as well as the others- so amazingly moderate. Of course I'm a closet lurker, .though.
~smiles~

Black_Bird
You are an awesome human. I think you'll only get more amazing as you age, and I'm glad to call you friend enough to know I could likely see that happen.

Dill..
Our friendship has been a trip! I wouldn't take a moment back of our banter and communication that I believe made us both better humans.

Ruby..
Boy, I'm glad I brought you here!
You shine like a diamond, girl.

Starfish..
The thought of you simply makes me smile..
Knowing you is truly a blessing.
Thank you.

Rain Dancer..
You simply rock!
Enough said.

Mister Man..
Thank you for playing with me..in a place I know you think is silly for me to be in while we do what we do.
I didn't mean to get so addicted..I just really like this place.
I love you…



Thanks for letting me take up some bandwidth, today.
I think I've kinda been saving it up.
~smiles~

Here's to another year of more sex talk on a board filled with Uber cool humans.

Lastly..
Hey Laurel..this is the best BBS out here.
So..thank you for that.


Oh, and Modest Mouse..when you read this, just remember as I'm typing this.. I'm thinking "Fuck you and the horse you rode in on!"
Okay?

 

[Guest]

I am damn glad our paths have crossed. I'm a better person because of it.
Congrats on your Litanniversary!

 

[Guest]

 

[ksmybuttons]

It is a pleasure to be in your company on this pleasure cruise. You are a delight!

 

[Dillinger]

Dill..
Our friendship has been a trip! I wouldn't take a moment back of our banter and communication that I believe made us both better humans.

Indeed. Nor would I. What a long strange trip its been. And I just love strange. Not to mention long.

Oh and trips too. I love trips.

 

[modest mouse]

Ok.

But my horse prefers little white trash wannabe harlots, not intelligent, mature women. You may be forced to get your beastiality fix with another mouse/horse team. I can ask around for you.

...and you owe me an Email, because I said so.

 

[Rubyfruit]

Sweet, wonderful, Dhal.

*kiss*

p.s. Can I call you this afternoon?

 

[Dhalgren]

Ruby..I't would be nice if you called.
Yeah, we are a bit over due, huh?


Thank you all for touching my heart through out this year.
It's been a trip indeed!

 

[Dhalgren]

..prefers little white trash wannabe harlots..

Yeah, when I saw this type of character in the game…I skipped right over it.

Maybe in my next life..I'll fill this one out on my character sheet.


I'll let ya know.

 

[Mister Man]

Originally posted by Dhalgren:
> I love you...

Okay, let me get this straight.

So last night when you said "I don't love you, and I never loved you," that was what? Truth? Fiction? Just fucking with my head? Are we back in a manic phase again? Do you say such things just for fun these days? It would be nice to know, because I'm getting pretty tired of this "impossibly nice person on Lit, mood-swinging psycho in RL" thing. You could really do with resolving a few inner conflicts.

For instance, why is it that here on Lit you're proud of saying "My husband and myself run adult web sites", but in RL you hate working on them, you think "porn is weird", and just yesterday you called me a "lowly" person (!) for running the adult sites? (Something this lowly person does, I might add, all ALONE, because you often remind me that I should never ask you to do any work again.)

Perhaps it's something else that you consider "lowly". What would it be? the studio? the webhosting business? the mall? Why do you like to tell me that my work sucks and that you want no part of it, when you tell Lit you're an "Interactive Artist/Writer/Graphic Artist living in Los Angeles with my amazing soul mate...creating websites for the strange". What, am I not strange enough for you?

Am I *too* strange, perhaps? Does it bother you that I'm a fulltime independent freak, rather than a clock-punching, tie-wearing, corporate tool? I wouldn't think so, but... Am I not capitalistic enough for your tastes? Did ya happen to notice the hemi-shaved head when you met me? Did my tattoo fail to clue you in?

Maybe it's got nothing to do with me at all. Maybe you're just projecting this "lowly" thing on me in real life, to better contrast with the beautiful realm you inhabit in your fictional one. We've certainly been *there* before (search on your own handle for breadcrumbs). But why would you be doing it *now*? I suppose it might stem from a current need for some sort of psychological highground - i.e., it could be nothing more than an ego-defense mechanism - but that still doesn't tell us *why*.

Does your "soul mate" have a right to ask "What the FUCK is your trip?"

Would I even get an answer?

You've already told me "I've never trusted you and I'm glad I've never trusted you" (several times in variations on the above, over the course of the last year), even while you're telling Lit "I married my best friend and soul mate". One has to wonder what the hell it is you're not trusting me with, when the title of "soul mate" is bandied about so readily. Of course you also said you *did* trust me, and you told Lit that you married me all over again (a fact with which, privately, you alternatively agree and disagree, depending on whether you feel like tossing your ring at me that day). Meanwhile, the only vow you actually opted to take was "I'll never say I don't love you again" - and as we have seen, this temptation was just to great to resist.

Of course, I don't expect to be given much cred in this place, since I'm the thing that represents your *reality*, as opposed to the google-augmented sagacity and imaginary sexuality shared by so many of your friends here. But I don't think anyone - even a board-dweller with no real life at all - would consider it a *good* thing that their S.O. turns her love on and off every other day, all the while posting on the board about how great her life is.

And saying "I never loved you" in RL, followed by saying "I love you" out of your persona's mouth here at Lit - that is completely fucked up. Is that your way of apologizing? If my fictional persona said "I love you too", do you somehow think that would mean more than everything I've said in the real world? Has reality turned upside-down for you now, and only what happens on the board matters?

Dig it: You're real, Dhalgren is not. My relationship is with you, not her. I am not "playing". And you have some issues to solve before you're dead, so figure it out already. The difference between you and Dhalgren is so extreme, it bypasses denial and heads straight into full-on schizophrenia. You like to say "Lit is a place where I find myself", but you're losing your grip on yourself in *real* life.

And you're losing me, just from the sloppy narrative.

- mM

 

[Black_Bird]

Coming from you, hon... that means alot.

 

[Black_Bird]

.

 

[Dhalgren]

Alright Mister Man..

I'm good with honesty.

The thing is you know you are an extremely jealous man..and quite possessive.

I said some things about people I know..and you create fiction.

You know that I can understand the way you handle things..but when you begin to lie about people we both know…it crosses a big line.

I know you'll say any lie-any harmful lie because it bothers you that I relate to others.
You hate that I use my time on a place you deem competition.

(i can't bare to read your whole post..)


Your goal is to do anything to make me stop writing here.
You think that people will believe your words as truth and I'll never get over the hatred it will drudge up.

But I have faith in these people..and I've seen you do this before.

Really low though..

As low as it gets, my friend.

 

[Mister Man]

Ok, which sentences are lies?

You tell me which, and then maybe you can start to be "good with honesty".

- mM

 

[Rambling Rose]

I read the whole post. I wish I hadn't. I am glad you're here, Dhalgren. No matter what. Thank you for your presence here.

 

[Guest]

 

[Rambling Rose]

Mister Man you have a pm. Please read it.

Peace.

 

[Black_Bird]

I don't know who he is, but he's pissing me off. Dhalgren; You're a great person and I'm really glad you're here. Don't let a fucktard like this guy drive you way.

 

[Dhalgren]

I dunno..

I really can't bare to read it.

But I know what you are doing.
And you do too.

I'm saddened that you felt the need to be this way.


Me being here bothers you so much.
And I guess I should have stopped…

But I thought you had tried.

I turned off my emails and made all my pass words open to you.
You read everything I send or receive.


Open and honest for the entire world to see..
Do you really have to destroy everything I enjoy?

Probably time to stop writing here..
And reading it is just sad.

You know where I live if you wanna communicate.

 

[Starfish]

I appreciate your intent in making this thread, Dhalgren.

Too bad that regardless of what life is like for you, it is an utter shame that any contradictions that exist couldn't be kept private, because your partner couldn't have had better taste than to ruin the good feelings you were sharing with us.

RL problems are hard enough.

MisterMan, your life is yours, but it is my opinion that even if you have reason to be upset with your partner or not, your post ruined this good vibe, and was in very bad taste.

 

[Guest]

Dhalgren,

I want to offer anything I can to help.
I am at a loss for any profound offerings of words. I'm sad that you may leave or that someone wants you to leave. Whatever the case, you are cared for, very much so.

 

[riff]

As a perfect son of imperfect creation, which is just a fancy way of saying I am a man with a heart, I just want to say....

Live a little, learn a little, learn a little. It seems to be all I can do.

(hug)

Your words touch me.

 

[Mister Man]

Love Under Will

"Dhalgren" wrote:
> Your goal is to do anything to make me stop writing here.

Your answers are unsatisfactory, and you have yet to apologize for your recent lapses of consciousness. If you wish me to remain tolerant of your fondness for this place, you will take responsibility for your actions, you will accept your own consequences, and you will prove your devotion, right here.

You know exactly what to do.

- mM

 

[Rambling Rose]

Oh good. This is the perfect place for any mate to prove their devotion. You're a bit of a control freak, Mister Man. Go talk to your wife privately and stop bringing this shit to the board. It's gone beyond innappropriate and straight into scary now.

Remain tolerant? God, I'd be happy if you remained on some other little corner of cyber space. Just what happens if you are no longer tolerant? Do you leave her? From what I've read that may not be such a bad thing after all.

Or maybe you'll just tie her to the piano with a full bladder and bang out Bach.

 

[Ginny]

that's really weird....are they like in the same house...posting crap back and forth?