What’s ‘Diagnosable’?

[EastMidsMale2]

Anyone else ponder whether their ‘appetite’ for sexually motivated thoughts and stimulus goes beyond fantasy and fetish and tips over into being diagnosable as an addiction?….

 

[Desiree_Radcliffe]

I think that anything that impacts your life in a negative way overall and affects the quality of your life can be something you should be concerned about. Sex addiction is one of those hard ones, because there are (or were, I don't know the current trends) different ideas about it. If you are, maybe, constantly chatting to get the fix and then feel super guilty after, but then repeat the process anyway...and it becomes compulsive, you might be concerned. Also, sometimes that can be part of another thing, like bipolar disorder. But, like, I am not a professional and if you are concerned for yourself or someone else, you should try to consult a therapist or doctor. Assuming that is what you meant.

 

[EastMidsMale2]

Oh by the way - that wasn’t a personal reflection necessarily - and I think what you say relates to what I would ‘think’ about it. Sex doesn’t ever overbear my personal life or impact it in a negative way. And that’s quite an interesting point - I see a common trend in perception that if ‘something’ is possibly evolving into something ‘clinical’ it can be assumed to be negative.

And I’m not suggesting you’re wrong or meant anything critical - but lots of diagnosable behaviours are really positive.

So. If you’re obsessed with tennis and can’t get enough - society says cool. You’re committed and dedicated. We don’t diagnose.

But if you just can’t get enough threesome porn scenes and end up venturing into the ‘niche’ categories on the hub - that same enthusiasm is classed as diagnosable!

 

[Sageboundtight]

I went to therapy in the past because a partner thought my sex drive was too overactive and I was an addict. I've never done crazy things to get sex just wanted more connection(and wasn't educated enough on relationship) with a partner and I think we were mismatched in that department. Compulsivity and associated guilt like Desiree_Radcliffe touched on is the spot to study more I believe.

But Idk shit.

 

[EastMidsMale2]

I also know the sum total of fuck all about psychology and what you both say makes entire sense. (Which is VERY rare here!).

On a personal note - I resonate with the scenario when a partner says you should get therapy - and it being a terrible take: all that taught me was ‘I’m sound. You not getting that is your issue’.

All counselling taught me was to back myself

 

[Sageboundtight]

I also know the sum total of fuck all about psychology and what you both say makes entire sense. (Which is VERY rare here!).

On a personal note - I resonate with the scenario when a partner says you should get therapy - and it being a terrible take: all that taught me was ‘I’m sound. You not getting that is your issue’.

All counselling taught me was to back myself

Good.

I'm always looking at my and think at this age maybe it's just better to be alone. But that sucks. Easy to back yourself up alone tho.

 

[Desiree_Radcliffe]

Oh by the way - that wasn’t a personal reflection necessarily - and I think what you say relates to what I would ‘think’ about it. Sex doesn’t ever overbear my personal life or impact it in a negative way. And that’s quite an interesting point - I see a common trend in perception that if ‘something’ is possibly evolving into something ‘clinical’ it can be assumed to be negative.

And I’m not suggesting you’re wrong or meant anything critical - but lots of diagnosable behaviours are really positive.

So. If you’re obsessed with tennis and can’t get enough - society says cool. You’re committed and dedicated. We don’t diagnose.

But if you just can’t get enough threesome porn scenes and end up venturing into the ‘niche’ categories on the hub - that same enthusiasm is classed as diagnosable!

No, actually. You could be obsessed with tennis in an unhealthy way that affects the rest of your life. Maybe you don't eat or miss work constantly, because you are always at the court.

Like, literally in the DSM, when the doctor diagnoses something, a big factor in a diagnosis is that it impacts the person's life in a way that is debilitating.

So, like, you could like niche sex stuff. One of your fetishes could even be, like, that you think pictures of garbage cans are arousing. But that's not itself a paraphilia (a clinical thing). If that is the only way that you can get off, and you are running around town with your dick in a trashcan, that is different. Does that make sense?

I didn't think that you were saying that you had anything or thought you did. I just thought you were asking out of some curiosity. I certainly wasn't relating it to you in particular and usually, in instances like these, when I use "you" I mean in the general sense of anyone.

Sex addiction is something that clinicians argue about, because there are some who think it's prudish to pretend it's a thing, and there are some that think that if something impacts a person's life, it can be part of a bigger problem. There is a spectrum, right?

Also, there aren't any clinical diagnoses of particular fetishes, except for when you get into the realm of sadism and masochism, and even that has to be super extreme. Like, cenobite extreme.

So, no, it's not about enthusiasm at all. Something is diagnosable if it's hurting you and/or those around you.

 

[Sageboundtight]

No, actually. You could be obsessed with tennis in an unhealthy way that affects the rest of your life. Maybe you don't eat or miss work constantly, because you are always at the court.

Like, literally in the DSM, when the doctor diagnoses something, a big factor in a diagnosis is that it impacts the person's life in a way that is debilitating.

So, like, you could like niche sex stuff. One of your fetishes could even be, like, that you think pictures of garbage cans are arousing. But that's not itself a paraphilia (a clinical thing). If that is the only way that you can get off, and you are running around town with your dick in a trashcan, that is different. Does that make sense?

I didn't think that you were saying that you had anything or thought you did. I just thought you were asking out of some curiosity. I certainly wasn't relating it to you in particular and usually, in instances like these, when I use "you" I mean in the general sense of anyone.

Sex addiction is something that clinicians argue about, because there are some who think it's prudish to pretend it's a thing, and there are some that think that if something impacts a person's life, it can be part of a bigger problem. There is a spectrum, right?

Also, there aren't any clinical diagnoses of particular fetishes, except for when you get into the realm of sadism and masochism, and even that has to be super extreme. Like, cenobite extreme.

So, no, it's not about enthusiasm at all. Something is diagnosable if it's hurting you and/or those around you.

You crack me up. You are well spoken, decisive and digestible.

I used to climb mountains even when I knew my knees were going to swell, lockup and I'd be stuck out there happily camping in pain soaking knees in cold stream. It was obsessive and ignoring preservation instincts.

Dick in a trashcan is great

 

[Desiree_Radcliffe]

You crack me up. You are well spoken, decisive and digestible.

I used to climb mountains even when I knew my knees were going to swell, lockup and I'd be stuck out there happily camping in pain soaking knees in cold stream. It was obsessive and ignoring preservation instincts.

Dick in a trashcan is great

 

[Sageboundtight]

Bahahahah....I hadn't seen that before. Like dirty flight of the Concords. So funny. Well my gift ideas are taken care of for this year So bad

 

[Desiree_Radcliffe]

Bahahahah....I hadn't seen that before. Like dirty flight of the Concords. So funny. Well my gift ideas are taken care of for this year So bad

It's one of those newer classic SNL skits. I am glad I could give you something nice. Muahahahaha.

 

[Sageboundtight]

I don't have current television(I guess I have a phone is I have everything) so thank you. And nice laugh by the way. Fitting for today.

This is my favorite and it touches on the tennis topic discussed earlier

 

[Desiree_Radcliffe]

I don't have current television(I guess I have a phone is I have everything) so thank you. And nice laugh by the way. Fitting for today.

This is my favorite and it touches on the tennis topic discussed earlier

Their "Bowie in Space" is iconic. Sorry to have derailed the thread.

 

[Sageboundtight]

Their "Bowie in Space" is iconic. Sorry to have derailed the thread.

Me too. Apologies. I'll check it out now. Thank you. Blessings

 

[EastMidsMale2]

Wise words! And great clips!