Wanted: Advice for using stapless strapon

[SweetMerry]

So, I got a strapless strapon (this model) to try with a bi guy lover. Neither one of us had experience with one before, and we found it a bit challenging. Basically, it wouldn't stay in me. We even resorted to trying to secure it with bondage tape, which worked fairly well until the tape started to stretch and bunch. Eventually we gave up and moved on to other things with the promise to give it another try later.

Any advice for a strapless strapon newbie?

 

[CWatson]

Well, I have no experience with this stuff whatsoever--my ex-lover and I were going to try pegging, but we never got round to it before we broke up. But this is just what I can think of looking into the situation from outside.

1) Your PC muscles. Every woman's endowment is different, but having strong PC muscles that can grip for protracted periods of time might help. (Unfortunately this is not something you can develop overnight.)

2) The design of the toy. Regardless of what it says on the packaging, the simple fact is that the vagina is designed to have something go in it, while the anus is not. Getting something into the anus is a more-strenuous activity and puts more stress on the inserting object (and this I do know from personal experience, because I was never able to oblige my ex's love of anal). Simply put, I bet it's more difficult to use any toy for anal activities as opposed to vaginal ones, especially one that's designed to multi-purpose.

3) The quality of the toy itself. I wouldn't trust a sex toy that cost less than about $70. It's a known fact that mankind judges objects based on their price, and that it's possible to fleece customers by putting the price point of a (crappy) object right in the sweet spot. But the simple fact is that the heuristic still works. The site I'm most inclined to trust for my sex-toy needs is blowfish.com, and their absolute cheapest double-ender is $65, with the average being more like $90 or $100. Does this mean that your toy is inferior? No... only that it might be. But that can make a difference, especially when it comes to how they design the end of the toy that goes inside you. (And that end is the most important, since it's the structural weak point in terms of the toy being used the way it's meant to be.)

To repeat the original disclaimer: I have absolutely no idea what I'm talking about, and all my advice should be taken with a grain of salt the size of a mountain. But, if you asked me, that's what I'd say.

 

[silverwhisper]

my knowledge relates exclusively to strap-ons that have, uh, straps. :>

i do remember hearing good stuff about the feeldoe, but that wasn't a universal positive: reviews were kinda mixed, althoug i think the net response was chiefly positive.

and i'm assuming with all of this that you're using lube, etc, which would have a pretty significant impact on your results.

ed

 

[qrayze]

I have one of the Feeldoe brand ones, and the important thing is to train your pelvic floor muscles to "grab" hold of the bulb that gets inserted into your vagina. Walk around your house with it in (no underwear or pants on) for about a half-hour. That should help.

Also, looking at the type you have, I can see how you would have trouble; the bulb isn't nearly big enough to stay lodged inside the vagina (hooking onto the pelvic bone), and the dildo part is really big at the top which can make penetration for beginners difficult.

Feeldoe's are expensive, but they are totally worth it.

 

[SweetMerry]

Thanks for the replies. I'll work on developing some gripping power down there, as the issue seems to be on my end of things. And if we still can't get it to work comfortably, I'll look into the Feeldoe.

 

[SweetErika]

Thanks for the replies. I'll work on developing some gripping power down there, as the issue seems to be on my end of things. And if we still can't get it to work comfortably, I'll look into the Feeldoe.

You could also see if you can get a harness that your current toy will fit into. That'd give you added flexibility in the future as well if you decided you liked wearing a harness (I do) and/or wanted different dildos.

 

[SweetMerry]

You could also see if you can get a harness that your current toy will fit into. That'd give you added flexibility in the future as well if you decided you liked wearing a harness (I do) and/or wanted different dildos.

Good idea. I'll think about it.