Wanted: accomplished smugglers

[Subo97]

to join the sex toy underground.

A Federal Appeals Court has declared that the State of Alabama has the right to outlaw sex toys and that there is no right of Sexual Privacy under the Constitution.

People this is a crisis!

Millions of Alabamans are bereft of sexual enhancement aids. From Birmingham to Huntsville, alabamans are engaging in phone sex with no assistance other than their own fingers and whatever they can find in the kitchen.

It is dangerous work. Captured agents can be expect to be tortured by Jerry Falwell sermons and Lee Greenwood songs. It is not for the light hearted.

Where you hide the sex toys while passing over the border is left up to each agent.

Applications are now being considered. Please leave your qualifications and vital statistics on this thread.

The march of freedom is not to be denied.

 

[boxofrocks]

Only in America...

We have sex parties here... anything goes

The vibrators are imported from China, so have weird faces on them, because they aren't allowed to symbolise a cock.

Go figure LOL

They can look like a Cheeseburger and I could care less as long as they are phallic shaped and give me a buzz

 

[cantdog]

Smuggling has a long and honorable tradition in my state. I'm retired now, and at one time I used to tell the firemen I'd probably start a second career at it.

Sex toys down. What are the cigarette taxes like in Alabama? What can I smuggle back up?

 

[Subo97]

I might add..

while there is no pay as such, the benefits are obvious. You get to meet brave freedom fighters like boxofrocks. Phallic shaped cheeseburgers? No wonder they were dragging Ronald McDonald away.

where are all those liberal activist judges when you need one?

 

[Guest]

I AM a sex toy.

I'd be caught for sure.

 

[Guest]

 

[Svenskaflicka]

Oh, if only I had the possibility to do it, I swear to you I would help out!

You poor, poor dears...

 

[shereads]

In the proud tradition of my dad's Southern Appalachian ancestors, I'll make bootleg sex toys. I don't know how bootlegging is done exactly, but I know it involves corn.

And a banjo. I'll need banjo accompaniment when the Revenuers are chasing my souped-up Pontiac Firebird.

 

[cloudy]

I can be the contact within enemy territory.

Sadly enough, I live in Alabama.

 

[shereads]

I can be the contact within enemy territory.

Sadly enough, I live in Alabama.

Does Alabama have corn?

 

[Lord DragonsWing]

Well hell. I missed that article in the Mobile Press. But I can make runs for the next party. Gives tupperware parties a new definition. lol

 

[shereads]

Well hell. I missed that article in the Mobile Press. But I can make runs for the next party. Gives tupperware parties a new definition. lol

Tupperware...Hmm.

What's needed is a way to make sex toys that look like ordinary things one might have around the house. Things that even the Sex Toy Police are likely to find indispensable in their own homes.

Any ideas?

 

[Tome Reader]

I AM a sex toy.

I'd be caught for sure.

Pardon the thread hijack... but that is a lovely, lovely AV.

 

[Clare Quilty]

I've smuggled the occasional cuban cigar from Canada to the U.S., which at 8" x 54 gauge could be used as a sex toy. Of course, this was pre-9/11.

 

[Guest]

Pardon the thread hijack... but that is a lovely, lovely AV.

*blush* Thanky, Ma'am. *blush*

 

[Guest]

I'll need banjo accompaniment when the Revenuers are chasing my souped-up Pontiac Firebird.

Sher, pardon me but I can't let this go by. You misspelled Revenoors. Depending on what holler one is from, it can sometimes be spelled Revenooers, or even Revnoors. I grew up next to "hillbillies" in Detroit.

Perdita

 

[Tome Reader]

*blush* Thanky, Ma'am. *blush*

Oooooh, and I made him blush, too!

Score!

 

[GratefulFred]

I'll help 'bama out...

I got a few used sex dolls badly in need or some repairs and a some mold removal. Only 12 years old also.

Ok people let's start a collection.

 

[Belegon]

I'd be willin' ta do some shoppin' fah the poor oppressed souls en 'Bama...

Dago ain't up to SF standards on toy stores, but we have a few...

Cloudy, my secret wish would be that you would ignore the presents and go for the delivery boy...

 

[snooper]

The Alabamans will just have to make do with human penises. I know they don't vibrate like the real thing, but they will have to do.

If you lived in a democracy, and a majority of people wanted the law changed, it would happen. Just like in Europe, where 70% (Opinin Poll respondents) want capital punishment brought back.

 

[snooper]

Incidentally, please post a link when the first Alabaman policeman is arrested for posession of sex toys, to wit a nightstick and handcuffs.

 

[cloudy]

Does Alabama have corn?

And peas.



And juice is still legal.

But of course, Belegon. Toys plus hot delivery guy - heaven!

 

[Colleen Thomas]

For a serious moment here. i am heading home soon and have to drive through Alabama. If I get pulled over i wonder if I can get arrested for having a vibe in my luggage?

-Colly

 

[cloudy]

For a serious moment here. i am heading home soon and have to drive through Alabama. If I get pulled over i wonder if I can get arrested for having a vibe in my luggage?

-Colly

Call me - I'll come get you out of jail.

 

[Colleen Thomas]

Call me - I'll come get you out of jail.

thanks

*HUGS*