Vulnerable exhibitionist

[sara_l]

Hi

I am not very experienced in unusual sexual things.
But I realized that it turns me on to be dressed in a revealing outfit especially if it is out of my control and I feel vulnerable and helpless.

My experience of realization was a little while ago.
Due to a misunderstanding I ended up wearing a thin cardigan with a single tie at the top. I had to go to a good-bye party at a bar but had to work late and my friends picked me up - and after a misunderstanding and an awkward conversation I had the choice between my lab-outfit and the cardigan with nothing underneath . That was a little more daring than I was comfortable with. I felt naked, exposed and vulnerable and that turned me really on.
The concerned looks and comments of my co-workers (mainly women) made the feeling even stronger.

I had worn sexy outfits before but that night was really an accident but I have been fantasizing about it since.
I felt not in control at all, I felt vulnerable and I liked it.

Can you relate to this? Have experience (advice) in acting on such a fantasy.

I would like to try similar things but am afraid to talk to my friends.
In fact part of the turn on is to do something I shouldn’t.

Maybe this is the wrong forum please tell me if you can think of a better place?

 

[VelvetDarkness]

This sounds to me like you're excited by the feelings of shame and humiliation that come with wearing revealing clothes and dressing like a slut. It's not uncommon but if you're doing this in public you need to be very aware of your personal safety and how much you drink as this kind of behaviour could unfortunately lead to a sexual assault or intimidating sexual attention that you don't want.

You might want to have a look at the BDSM Talk Forum, we're well versed in humiliation play over there.

 

[human_male]

I agree, be careful of your own personal safety.

 

[SweetErika]

The concerned looks and comments of my co-workers (mainly women) made the feeling even stronger.

Also, not to rain on your parade, but I hope you recognize that in addition to putting you at risk, this kink could make others very uncomfortable, and try to eliminate or minimize that as much as possible. I'm sure you wouldn't want your friends spending a good chunk of the night being distracted from their fun or agonizing over your safety, whether or not they should say anything, how they might comment without hurting your feelings (remember, they don't know you like the humiliation!), etc.

There are places where people accept this type of kink (e.g. fetish clubs, exhibitionist groups, certain parties/events), and while it may not be quite as thrilling as showing off to friends or more conventional strangers, you'll likely be much safer and happier knowing you're enjoying yourself while being respectful of others in the end.

 

[sara_l]

Thank your for the advice.
Yes I want to be cautious and don’t want to cause harm to me or others.
But I don’t see myself at a fetish club or exhibitionist group.

Any ideas on how to create my fantasy situation in a save and responsible way?

 

[johnnynice02]

............

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[Yang4yin]

Thank your for the advice.
Yes I want to be cautious and don’t want to cause harm to me or others.
But I don’t see myself at a fetish club or exhibitionist group.

Any ideas on how to create my fantasy situation in a save and responsible way?

If you have a friend you can trust to protect you if necessary, go out with him/her. Other than that, you might try driving through town in your locked car.




.

 

[sara_l]

I think my fantasy is a little different than just showing off.

I want to be in a situation that makes me feel vulnerable because I am dressed in a way that is slightly inappropriate and could lead to unwanted exposure

I don’t want to walk around flashing people.
I also don’t want just dress-up in a slutty outfit and go tease men.
My fantasy is that me the sophisticated level-headed woman somehow ends up in this situation.

So I don’t think the mall / car ideas would work

But thank you for answering

 

[Guest]

I think my fantasy is a little different than just showing off.

I want to be in a situation that makes me feel vulnerable because I am dressed in a way that is slightly inappropriate and could lead to unwanted exposure.

As I read your original post, you actually didn't wind up being exposed that night, but you might have. So you want to be in a situation where something out of your control might happen, causing you to be unwillingly--but thrillingly--exposed.

That's a fairly common fantasy. Variations include "forgetting" to wear panties under a skirt that might be blown up by a sidewalk air vent or the wind; or under a wraparound skirt that might somehow come undone; or wearing that pesky blouse that just won't stay buttoned--and you with no bra! Or that normal-looking swimsuit that turns totally transparent when wet.

All of which can be accomplished with fairly conservative clothing.

Of course, if you have a confederate who knows your secret turn-on, and who might do something to cause you to be unwillingly exposed--or might not--then you're onto something!

 

[alaskabibear]

Another thought; since this seems to be a newly discovered pleasure perhaps you could spend some enjoyable moments writing some erotica that probes your new feelings and publishing it here. This would give you a safe way to explore/research the things that excite you and perhaps provide a safe outlet for your fantasies (at least for a while until you better understand this new desire and learn how to safely indulge it for real).

 

[onthebeachtoo]

interesting fantasy!

Are you into flashing? Have you ever flashed a stranger..maybe no panties ...or maybe a down blouse view?

 

[Zoots_owner]

Hmmm...

If you also have a submissive streak, maybe you could use a firm hand to guide you into interesting situations, which are beyond your control, while keeping an eye on you and making sure that you're safe.

Such things work for some people.

 

[In Anticipation]

Hi

I am not very experienced in unusual sexual things.
But I realized that it turns me on to be dressed in a revealing outfit especially if it is out of my control and I feel vulnerable and helpless.

My experience of realization was a little while ago.
Due to a misunderstanding I ended up wearing a thin cardigan with a single tie at the top. I had to go to a good-bye party at a bar but had to work late and my friends picked me up - and after a misunderstanding and an awkward conversation I had the choice between my lab-outfit and the cardigan with nothing underneath . That was a little more daring than I was comfortable with. I felt naked, exposed and vulnerable and that turned me really on.
The concerned looks and comments of my co-workers (mainly women) made the feeling even stronger.

I had worn sexy outfits before but that night was really an accident but I have been fantasizing about it since.
I felt not in control at all, I felt vulnerable and I liked it.

Can you relate to this? Have experience (advice) in acting on such a fantasy.

I would like to try similar things but am afraid to talk to my friends.
In fact part of the turn on is to do something I shouldn’t.

Maybe this is the wrong forum please tell me if you can think of a better place?

Hmm, the lab coat with nothing under it would have been hot!

If you have a friend you can trust to protect you if necessary, go out with him/her. Other than that, you might try driving through town in your locked car.




.

Good advice, be safe!

Perhaps the skill is finding the right balance between vulnerability and actual danger.

 

[ivantheterrible]

maybe make sure you have a big strong man around to keep an eye on you while you play out your vulnerablity? someone who can hang in the background and other people don't know he is with you. that way you have a safety net.

 

[HardNightDay]

Thank your for the advice.
Yes I want to be cautious and don’t want to cause harm to me or others.
But I don’t see myself at a fetish club or exhibitionist group.

Any ideas on how to create my fantasy situation in a save and responsible way?

Hi Sarah, I don't think there's any cause for concern here. There's a time and place for this sort of thing and my first impression is you seem to have a handle on that. I'm also a little shocked at the implication that you're not safe! I am assuming that you aren't intending to walk dark streets alone, or drink too much. I see no reason why you shouldn't be able to do the things you're talking about safely. The only thing I would caution is be careful with work environments. For the sake of one's career its best not to experiment there.

I also agree there's no need to go to extremes with this. It sounds like you're having fun and would like to experience more. why not go with that and hold judgment about if you want to go further for later?

How about going out to a dance club with friends or your boyfriend? Even by yourself is ok. Wear something a little more revealing than you're used to. Dance clubs are great because they're very good at letting you draw as much or as little attention to yourself as you want. Another idea is, how about wearing something revealing to a library...really shake up those book worms! Summer is almost over, but try laying out in a park in a very skimpy bikini...

My curious is peaked by you're friends comments. I'm curious what they said. Would you mind sharing further?

I think what you're experiencing is a little bit of an exhibitionist thrill. My last girlfriend used to like to dress in very short skirts....very short...and wow did she have the legs for it! We discussed a couple of times how she got a little thrill out of people noticing, nothing wrong with that.

 

[sugarisnice]

The best way to go about being an exhibitionist is to do so with someone you love and care about who shares the interest, like walking up to them at their work and saying, "I'm not wearing anything under my lab coat." You could actually have something on, but just saying it is the turnon. Always conduct your exhibition in a safe area and manner. You don't want to show yourself off to the wrong person, who may have the wrong idea. If you do this for your own thrill, do it in a public place, such as a mall and just walk around with nothing under a raincoat. That should be a big enough thrill at first.

 

[sara_l]

update and thank you for feedback

Hi a quick update

A few people contacted me. Some messages were quite mindless (to be polite), but I got some good feedback – the posts here and private messages. I mailed with a few people and have actually tried some things.

I created situations in which I ended up dressed in a vulnerable way.
Some attempts failed and nothing much happened but I also had a few great experiences.

I prepared a blouse so that the buttons would come undone ( I replaced the original buttons with smaller ones). I went to a bookstore – the anticipation was the best part. After that I wore it for a night out – crazy experience overall thrilling and a big turn on.

I also had someone order me to run an errant in an outfit that was determined by chance - first run was soso the second run worked out really well.

My last adventure was Halloween – the whole thing worked out differently than planned. But I ended up dancing in a very vulnerable outfit and also walked around in it.

I think I am slowly finding out what works, at the same time I try more extreme things – just have to be careful that I don’t overdo it.
But I definitely want to try a few more things.

Sara

 

[CumalotCastle]

Very interesting concept that has always turned me on (thinking of a girl in that situation). How did the buttons at the bookstore work out? Did you have a bra underneath?

 

[NakedMale]

Love the way you are exploring your sexuality in a good well planned responsible way. Good luck to you. From the male point of view its far far better to see some flesh by accident rather that blatent design. See some thing that your not meant to see has far more impact.

 

[silverwhisper]

you know, one of my favorite things is when someone asks a question, then finds the old thread & posts an update.

i'm glad this is working for you, sara! :>

ed

 

[HornyHenry]

This sounds like fun

Hi a quick update

A few people contacted me. Some messages were quite mindless (to be polite), but I got some good feedback – the posts here and private messages. I mailed with a few people and have actually tried some things.

I created situations in which I ended up dressed in a vulnerable way.
Some attempts failed and nothing much happened but I also had a few great experiences.

I prepared a blouse so that the buttons would come undone ( I replaced the original buttons with smaller ones). I went to a bookstore – the anticipation was the best part. After that I wore it for a night out – crazy experience overall thrilling and a big turn on.

I also had someone order me to run an errant in an outfit that was determined by chance - first run was soso the second run worked out really well.

My last adventure was Halloween – the whole thing worked out differently than planned. But I ended up dancing in a very vulnerable outfit and also walked around in it.

I think I am slowly finding out what works, at the same time I try more extreme things – just have to be careful that I don’t overdo it.
But I definitely want to try a few more things.

Sara

Yeah, like people said, be sure you are in a safe place, or with a "Wingman" who will watch your back, like a trusted girlfriend. The library sounds like a great place to start. Target guys you can have an instant fantasy about, then be sure they notice what you are doing!
Of course you are not doing it to be slutty or an exibitionist, but guys WILL NOTICE YOU! So, be prepared for that and enjoy it. I certainly think it is very hot to see and I'll probably just give you a smile to let you know I appreciate it. So just smile back.

Remember, YOU are in control. YOU have the power, even if you feel vulnerable inside. No one needs to know you are doing your own fantasy, unless you want them to know.

Damn!. Yes, it's hawt!

 

[Jack_Samuel]

Hi Sarah,

Its really good to see these boards being put to good use. It sounds like you have found both more satisifaction and safety through some suggestions. I hope it keeps getting better

 

[sara_l]

new idea

Hi

Again thank you for the feed back I got here and by personal message.
I was focused on other stuff recently but kept on thinking about ways to get in a situation where I am dressed in a vulnerable outfit.

I was thinking about the following idea:
I know a nightclub that is looking for waitresses and bartenders. The girls working there always dress sexy – obviously to get tips. The whole atmosphere is very sexual.
I was thinking to try out for a job and wear something that makes me vulnerable. I would be in front of many people and would have to do a job so I am in some sense out of control.
At the same time it would be safe – they have security guys watching …

Do you have any thought – suggestions – ideas?

Thanks

Sara

 

[fireymatt]

That sounds like a good idea, if your willing to get another job and have the time. Try going to someplace that is busy and has lots of people... like a Home Depot or Costco with something like you described before.... revealing blouse... maybe heels and a skirt... have the button on the skirt pop off

 

[sterculius]

How about a part time job at Hooters?