Vibrating Sexy Toy Shuts Down Airport

cloudy

Alabama Slammer
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Vibrating Sex Toy Shuts Down Airport

Truth is really stranger than fiction, y'all...

BRISBANE, Australia - A scare triggered by a vibrating sex toy shut down a major Australian regional airport for almost an hour Monday, police said.

The vibrating object was discovered Monday morning inside a garbage can at the terminal cafeteria at Mackay Airport in Queensland state, a police spokeswoman said.

Cafeteria manager Lynne Bryant said her staff had been cleaning tables when they noticed a strange humming noise coming from the garbage can.

"It was rather disconcerting when the rubbish bin started humming furiously," Bryant said. "We called security and next minute everybody was being evacuated while they checked it out."

The police spokeswoman said the terminal was evacuated immediately. Passengers who had arrived on a recent flight, check-in staff, cafeteria employees and hire car personnel were all forced to leave.

"Another two flights were expected to land at that stage but alternate arrangements were made for the passengers to collect their luggage away from the terminal," the spokeswoman said on the usual condition of anonymity.

She said the emergency alert was canceled after 45 minutes when the package was identified as an adult sex toy.

Bryant said in retrospect, the humming sounded exactly like a vibrator, but it was better to be safe then sorry.

"You can't afford to take chances," Bryant said.
 
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I give the Brisbane CSI Lab twenty-four hours before they are requesting a sample of your DNA, vella. :eek:
 
What? Someone plugged it in and overloaded the power grid?





Ok ok ok, I'll read the article, and not just the headline. ;)

#L


Of course it's company policy never to, imply ownership in the event of a dildo... always use the indefinite article "a dildo", never "your dildo".
 
SeaCat said:
Hell, so would we, as long as they took pics and she posted them.:devil:

Cat

last time i was at the airport id forgotten that i had packed an old wallet i used for holding my tools.... erm.. i never did clean it out and they did pull me aside..
it was a big no no to carry box cutters on the flight.. YIKES!

i didnt get the strip search though.. *sigh*

so, whos ganna play the gaurd and when we set up our own scene??

pictures? hell i think a full out photo shoot... wow. i think i just got an idea for a story!

YEHAW!
 
I lost my pipe-reamer to the airport cops - almost.

The "blade" is one inch by one third of an inch. the end is rounded and it is uniformly about the thickness of heavy card with neither edge sharpened.

I pointed out that I had a much better weapon in my pocket to which they had not objected - a ball point pen. I said I would give up my pipe-reamer if they took every ballpoint pen and every pencil off every passenger on the flight.

Guess what? I WON, but my pipe-reamer travels in my hold baggage now.
 
Svenskaflicka said:
Why waste a fully functional, working vibrator like that???:confused:

You know, that was my first thought. Why was it in the garbage?
 
Svenskaflicka said:
Worn out?

Couldn't have been too worn out if it was loud enough to attract the attention it did.

Maybe it was too loud?
 
At work, one of my bosses said we mustn't keep our cellulars on, coz the signals would disturb the phone calls. It would be better to turn the sound off and just use the vibrator. Me, I couldn't help myself, so I pointed out:

"I usually don't bring my vibrator to work...":eek:
 
Svenskaflicka said:
Why waste a fully functional, working vibrator like that???:confused:
She had just met her boyfriend in the airport, naturally.

Check for a banging noise coming from one of the large public lockers.
 
A tip from the President's Council on Vibrator Care and Therapeutics: whever you're not using your vibe, take one battery out and reverse it and put it back in. It keeps the batteries where you can find them and keeps the things from going off accidently, like when it's in your luggage or underwear drawer at home.

---Zoot
 
And all this time, the first thing that came to my mind was that scene in Fight Club.

Probably a good thing no one else mentioned it.
 
flawed_ethics said:
And all this time, the first thing that came to my mind was that scene in Fight Club.

Probably a good thing no one else mentioned it.
Actually...

Liar said:
Of course it's company policy never to, imply ownership in the event of a dildo... always use the indefinite article "a dildo", never "your dildo".
 
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