Very angry and hurt

[knightstalker]

Ok friends I hate to be a downer but I have to get this off my chest..I got my Boys the other day and we went swimming well I was going to put some sun block on them and asked them to take thier shirts off ..They both hesitated and I told them do it now or no swimming for them ..My 8 year old started to cry which left me confused then the other started and said they couldn't take off their shirts because I would get mad ..I told them to get rid of the shirts now and they did ..What I saw had tears coming down my face ..They were black and blue and had burns on there back from smokes and a lighter..My god the feeling i got was like noithing else I ever felt ..I told them to tell me who did this..

I knew it was not my Ex or her boyfriend because they are good people ..My oldest told me he couldn't tell me because if he did he would be killed..ok now i was seeing red and wanted to get my hands on this bastard ..I told my boys that they had to tell me and that i promised they would be ok ..It ended up being the babysitters 15 year old daughter ..That little fucking bitch is already on a teether and after going to the police and fileing child abuse charges she will be going away til she is 18..

Her mother had the nerve to ask me to not press charges but i told her since she couldn't control her daughter she was out of a job also ...How could something like this happen ..How can you be babysitting and not know this is going on what the hell am I paying her for..

I am sorry to lay this down on you all but I had to get it off my chest ..Thank you for listening and taking the time to read this ..
Take care and have a great day

 

[naded]

My friend, if there is anything I can do, just ask.

 

[Jewelz]

Ohh my god. Mike, I am sickened to read this. My heart just sank. I am so very sorry for your sons and you. How disgusting that this happened. *hugs* Im sorry I am pretty speechless right now.. Just know that I will keep the boys in my thoughts.

 

[Ladybird]

Hey...... you say what you need and do what you need!!

Those poor little boys.. and what an evil bitch that girl is to put them thru that!!

I don't know how you coped... I'm furious here.. can hardly type.

I was abused as a child and I sorry hon.. but you never forget. You hug those little boys and give them as much love and reassurance as you can. Cos they're going to need it.

My love and prayers are with you, your sons and their mother.. that you ALL heal as quickly and painlessly as possible.

Bless you Mike.

 

[Nicodemus]

Vent, bitch, moan, cry, cuss....do what ever you have to whereever you have to. the fact that you went to the police rather than took things into your own hands is commendable. Just the thought of what took place had me thinking thoughts of felony level crimes. I am not a parent.....just a proud uncle and god-father but let someone treat either of them like that and I would see blood ( and probably demand it).

Right now the important thing is to be there for your sons and let them know that it was not their fault. Reassure them, let them know they are loved (although that is probably not in short demand) and most importantly keep that communication open. Even though it upset them to do so, telling you was the best thing and now you can help them to heal phycally and emotionally. I am sure all this is moot....you probably are doing all this and more between you and the x. Just some outrage (sure ya got plenty to spare) and alot of sypathy/support.

Nic,

 

[MissTaken]

The babysitter?

Can her ass!


HOw in the hell would her daughter have time to do those things if they were being supervised!

My son was two years old and except for my daughter was the youngest at the babysitter's home.

I showed up to pick him up one day and the babysitter was in tears adn repeatedly said, "I feel so bad." My lil guy had welts and rug burns all over his face.

Sotry was she ONLY left them alone for a minute, but she found the four year old on top of my guy , pummeling him.

This, after, I had told her NOT to leave my kids alone with the older kids. We had already dealt with bite marks and kicks to the ribs etc.

Ya Ya Ya

If ya can't do the job, you aren't doing it for me.


After five years I found a babysitter who is fantastic. I travel 20 miles out of my way to make sure the kids stay with her.

I have had some awful experiences with sitters, but have the utmost respect for those that lovingly give care to other's children in their home.

 

[Elizabeth]

I am so, so sorry about this KS. My heart goes out to you and your boys. I'd kill the little cunt but that's beside the point. You are taking the right legal steps and that's the best thing to do. (((((KS and boys))))

 

[knightstalker]

You have no idea how much you I truely consider you all friends ..I will post again and say more but right now I am a bit emotional over the words I have read from you all and it is hard to keep the tears from falling..Thank you so much to each and everyone of you ...If ever any of you need me I will be there ..Again thank you so much and I will post later..

 

[Mountain Man]

Kinghtstalker,

I can oinly imagine the anger that is coursing through you right now.

As the father of 2 daughters (5 & 7), i hope to never be in the position you find yourself in. The 15 yr old and her mother are lucky that all you did was press charges and call the police.

My thoughts are with you and your boys..I hopr they can recover from this and that you can as well.

 

[Canadian_Eh]

Knightstalker you have no need to be sorry. Those are your boys and you have ever right to vent, yell, swear and anything other thing you need to do. Hope the boys are ok and that you follow threw with the charges that girls needs help.

 

[Blue Dolphin]

Knightstalker
have seen you around but never spoken
but I have to say Sir
your post cut me up
I cannot imagine how you must have felt my friend
My heart
my prayers
and my thoughts are with you Sir
just wish I could do more
BD

 

[calif_hunk_2002]

Hang in there Buddy .....

Will say a prayer for the boys and their Dad to overcome this ordeal. Take Care.

 

[Tantanah]

Ok friends I hate to be a downer but I have to get this off my chest..I got my Boys the other day and we went swimming well I was going to put some sun block on them and asked them to take thier shirts off ..They both hesitated and I told them do it now or no swimming for them ..My 8 year old started to cry which left me confused then the other started and said they couldn't take off their shirts because I would get mad ..I told them to get rid of the shirts now and they did ..What I saw had tears coming down my face ..They were black and blue and had burns on there back from smokes and a lighter..My god the feeling i got was like noithing else I ever felt ..I told them to tell me who did this..

I knew it was not my Ex or her boyfriend because they are good people ..My oldest told me he couldn't tell me because if he did he would be killed..ok now i was seeing red and wanted to get my hands on this bastard ..I told my boys that they had to tell me and that i promised they would be ok ..It ended up being the babysitters 15 year old daughter ..That little fucking bitch is already on a teether and after going to the police and fileing child abuse charges she will be going away til she is 18..

Her mother had the nerve to ask me to not press charges but i told her since she couldn't control her daughter she was out of a job also ...How could something like this happen ..How can you be babysitting and not know this is going on what the hell am I paying her for..

I am sorry to lay this down on you all but I had to get it off my chest ..Thank you for listening and taking the time to read this ..
Take care and have a great day

It's terrible that this happened to your boys. How come your EX didn't notice this before?

 

[Bug Eyed Monster]

.

 

[Parris]

I'm so very sorry for all that you, your boys and your family as a whole are going through. You are to be commended for the way you handled the situation. You went to the police. You filed charges. You're assuring the boys that you love them and they are now safe. You're a loving, caring dad. You're boys are very fortunate to have you.

~Parris

 

[Guest]

 

[HoldenMcCrank]

As a Father I understand

You are to be comended for not beating the snot out of the girl that did this. The only thing that I can add is that you need too, I am sure that you already have, let your boys know that NO ONE has the Right to treat them like that! I am sorry that you had to go through this and I am Shocked that the Mother had the Balls to ask you not to press charges! I will always love my kids but that doesn't make them perfect!

Holden

 

[carrie-on]

HUGGGGGGG KS...My heart goes out to you and your kids,Baby!
I just can't believe she would threaten to kill them if they tell. Were there any other kids at that babysitter's house? If so, I hope they come forward if things like this have happened to them.
Again...huggggggssssss keep in touch !

 

[Angelofsex]

My heart stop...................

OMG.........I am so angry when I here something like that........Could just kill people who do that to kids.......How could they ever protect themselves......Anything with childen, I see red could hurt the bitch myself. Sorry for going on, but kids I love very much.......Kids pay for everything.

Mike I feel for you to fine that.....you hear of other kids but never think it would happen to yours.


((((((((((Mike)))))))))))) and your (((((((((((boys)))))))))))

 

[SexyChele]

Knightstalker, I don't really know you, but your story truly touched me. You see, I work for Children Protection Services, and this is - unfortunately - an all too common occurrance. You did well to handle it the way you did. Many people take the situation into their own hands, and end up on the wrong side of the law themselves. You are to be commended for this. It's tough when it involves your own kids to keep a level head.

If you don't mind, there are a couple of things I would like to add:

1. Get your boys into counciling. Especially if you do not know how long this behavior has been going on. If it was a one time only thing, counciling might only consist of one or two sessions. But if this abuse has been ongoing over several weeks/months, the damage could be much more severe than the physical. Having your boys speak to a therapist will help them to get rid of the "bad" feelings they might have, as well as learning to cope with trusting people again. This is NOT saying your boys won't talk to you, but sometimes a licensed therapist, especially one that handles child abuse cases, knows of warning signs that can help both you and your kids. (Kids who have been abused often become abusers, unless they receive counciling)

2. I know this is going to sound as though I'm defending the perpetrator, but I am not. Just asking you to keep in mind that for this girl, at 15, to abuse your boys in such a manner is probably indicative that she has been the subject of abuse. More than likely she has simply mimicked what has been done to her at some point in her past. This is what I meant when I said kids who are abused often become abusers. No, I'm not saying the girl was blameless nor should she be "left off the hook" - certainly not! But it might help you to understand her actions a little more.

3. Call Social Services in your area. It states you live in Michigan, and I'm not familiar with their laws, but most CPS will allow you to lodge a complaint against a babysitter. This is especially important if this woman babysits other children in her home. Your children may not have been the only ones abused! By contacting CPS, if the law enforcement hasn't already, they can investigate her home and/or contact the families of other children she may have babysat. This isn't true of all states, but it's worth checking out. Also, if the babysitter is operating a licensed day care center (which in most cases is not the case), your complaint is lodged with the licensing section of Social Services. If there is enough evidence of continued or sustained abuse, this woman could have her license revoked. Yes, it takes away her livelihood (chances are she operates unlicensed), but you might be taking other children out of a potentially harmful situation.

Good luck to you and to your boys. I can only hope justice is served as it should be.

 

[TBG]

I am saddened

I am saddened to hear about the awful ordeal your family is going through. As a father, it pains me to hear the ordeal you and your kids are going through. my thoughts are with you.

 

[hatara]

knightstalker I wish I could say something to help you at this time but it will take time and love. Tell your boys how much you love them and concentrate on them for now. I think the police should have charged the mother as well since the children were in her care. She is also responsible there is no way she could have not known what was going on.

You and your boys will be in my prayers.

 

[Marilyth]

I wish I lived in Michigan right now where I could be their babysitter and coddle them and make them mac & cheese and read them stories, and play nintendo and do all sorts of kid fun that they should be doing, instead of going thru adult-like evil things.

I think (in my opinion) that she should be treated as an adult!! Going away until 18 is BS, in my opinion. She needs to go away for a lot longer for what she did to them!!

Hug them and love them! They really need you and the rest of their family. I'm so glad that your ex & her bf are good people. They'll love them too, and these boys will be the most loved in the world!!

 

[peppermint_barbi]

In my thoughts and prayers

I have seen some of your posts around Lit but nothing has made me tear up as much as this. My heart, thoughts and prayers go out to you and your sons. If you ever need an ear, please let me know. I know you have many friends but it doesn't hurt to have one more. Prayers and thoughts to you and your children.

 

[Guest]

OMG!
Sweetie, I am so incredibly sorry to read that this has happened to your treasured boys. I know how much you love them, and that they are your life. The anger and pain you are going through, hun.

There's so much I'd like to say, but can't find the words to express. My heart is breaking for your precious children.

I'm sure the police have requested or adviced a medical exam, and documentation of the injuries that are visible.

As a former victim abuse advocate...this is just the beginning of the process, I feel you need to know this. I have lots of literature on where to go from here. I will pm you later with some more information, and how to deal with the emotions of you, your sons, and their mother.

As SexyChele stated, and as hard as it is to adjust the thoughts to, this 15 year old is probably a victim, too. It sounds like a typical acting out pattern to me. Not that it's ok, by any means, or that it makes it any easier to deal with. But if this babysitter was liscensed, your CPS agency can make sure that she no longer is, and to interview any other children that may have been hurt by this girl. The police usually have so long to cross report to CPS, but since this wasn't a 'in-home' abuse it may not get done at all, so I would also encourage you to make the phone call and get the ball rolling.

Sweetie, I just have to say....you did everything perfectly. You handled it wonderfully, and in a way that let your boys know that you will always protect them. This has given them re-assurance that they can come to you and feel safe, no matter what they fear. Your boys have got the best father, and they know it!

Also, the Victim Witness should be able to provide your boys and any other immediate family that has been effected by this with free counseling. It's part of their grants...and they should provide you with a list of therapist that work with them on this funding. I would also encourage this...before many more interviews take place and especially before the boys may have to testify in court.

If you need any help at all with this contacting these agencies, or finding out what your boys rights as victims of this horrible abuse. There should be an advocate that will be their just for your family, not employed by law-enforcement or CPS or the DA.

You know, my friend, that I'm here for you always. Ranting, venting, just to listen, or anything else you need.